To ask for your worst dinner party experiences?

[Smileandtheworldsmileswithyou]

I know there have been threads on this before, I just absolutely love them for some reason. These and the CF ones are the best! I'll start with mine. I had recently moved with my husband to a new country and my new boss invited me and a few other people from work to his house for dinner. When we arrived he was completely pissed, literally stumbling around drunk. He spent ages showing us a lizard on the wall which we all politely commented on, and waited and waited for the food...He then dropped a box of brownies all over the floor that another guest had brought as a gift and laughed about it for ages. Finally we were asked to sit down for dinner, but he said he couldn't carve the chicken so asked me to do it for him. He then came into the tiny kitchen to watch me try and carve it up and told me how I shouldn't worry, he would make sure I passed my probation at the end of the year. He then persuaded my husband to go in and finish off the job with the chicken before asking him if I was happy at work and if I liked him. We finally got to the table and he starts drinking my wine which I just ignore. He then tells everyone that he has made the bread rolls himself, even though I saw them in a packet in the kitchen. He told us a big elaborate tale about where he found the seeds for them. Dessert was finally served at around 1am, by which time everyone was desperate to get the hell out of there. He said we should take it in turns to host, funnily enough no one ever did take him up on that!

[madcatladyforever]

I've spent three Christmases with my aunt who is a born again Christian. Every single time her cat found the turkey and would eat it a big chunk of it leaving a big hole.
My aunt would stuff the hole with stuffing and just serve it hoping nobody was looking.
Then grace would last at least half an hour with much praise the Lord. Waving of hands and hallelujah by which time lunch was stone cold.

[TinySongstress]

Oh I do hope 'Pom Bears' makes an appearance soon. That was my favourite

[jollygoose]

My first ever dinner party my dh and I cooked a duck and he made a lovely orange sauce. I had no idea that a cooked duck shrinks to half the size and by the time it was cooked was clearly only big enough for 2. The guests had the duck and we had kentucky fried chicken and orange sauce, 30 years later and I have never cooked duck since.

[hansgrueber]

There have been a few times we have been invited for dinners different people’s home - only for there to be no food!

NWe were invited to dinner at a fairly grand home during our working with the military period, no table laid, no signs of any food other than nibbles with the drinks, neither host nor hostess left the room. After an hour or so the hostess stood up and announced Dinner is served, and led up all outside where the chippy van was parked! It turned out to be a brilliant evening.

[MajorMujer]

Not a dinner party as such, but my first time visiting DH's Aunt I was served tiny portions of her wonderful food, think 2 small roast potatoes, 1 thin slice of beef and a dessert spoon of peas whilst DH and FIL were served " penis portions "

[Octopuscrazy]

My mum once had a lunch event that she catered for. It was about 15 people all adult women and she had made plenty of food. Enough for at least 25 with extra for the family later, all served buffet style. One of the women took 3 tupperware containers, filled them to the brim and put them to one side to take home, then proceeded to pile her plate with a mountain of food (leftovers were also taken home). There was just about enough for everyone else present and none left over for the rest of the family when everyone else got back from work /school. My mum and I just looked at each other and didn't say anything. Needless to say she was promptly crossed of the invite list for future events.

[allfurcoatnoknickers]

I once showed up to a friend's flat for a dinner party and the dinner was a bottle of vodka and a bowl of guacamole with tortilla chips. I definitely enjoyed myself, but did NOT enjoy myself the next day when I had to go to work after drinking vodka on an empty stomach.

One of my colleagues nicknamed it the "vodka and french bulldogs" party, because the couple had matching frenchies I was very taken with.

[Octopuscrazy]

*out of her bag

[Octopuscrazy]

Another time we were invited to a dinner with about 20 other people. The hostess spent most of the first part of the evening in the kitchen cooking. When it came to dinner time, we were each served a bowl of soup and about 5 pieces of chicken for the table and that was it. We looked at each other, like is that it and it was. Had to stop for a takeaway on the way home.

[BakedTattie]

We had a couple who were good friends round for dinner one night. My husband is a chef and we both love entertaining.

The couple turned up empty handed. No problem though, never expected. But! We had (one) bottle of champagne then prosecco. The couple moaned we didn’t have any more champagne. I offered them beer, wine, prosecco, spirits.... nope they wanted champagne. We didn’t have any more though. They weren’t happy so accepted wine grudgingly.
My husband had made a lovely starter, then as we knew the couple loved it, we had venison and dauphinois potato’s, followed by a nice cheese board. Our ‘friends’ drank 3 bottles of wine between them throughout the meal, then desert wine, followed by whisky. Over the whisky, they proceeded to critique the whole night and , criticise my husbands cooking. It was awful, you could have cut the tension with a knife.

They left without so much as a thank you. But said they would have us to their house to ‘show us how to throw a ‘proper’ dinner party’

We went to theirs (grudgingly!) a month later. Arrived and They had no food in so left us at theirs to go to the shops. Came back bragging about what an amazing meal we were about to have.

They served us both a glass of Coke, with plain penne pasta with smoked sausage cut up through it to eat.

Safe to say, we aren’t friends anymore.

[SirGawain]

Again not a dinner party. We were invited to an afternoon gathering for a friends 25th wedding anniversary. As it was early afternoon we did not expect a full meal but assumed that there would be some canapes or light snacks so we had a very light lunch. In the event the only food for a sizable crowd was a few bits left over from the family lunch that they had held. I was just about to take a bite from the only item left when DW signaled me not to eat it. Earlier she had spotted a large fly crawling over it. We really had to stay a couple of hours out of courtesy but we were starving and went to a restaurant as soon as we left. I don't think they were mean, (still good friends 18 years later), I think it was just a misunderstanding of expectation.

[LadyHedgehog]

@FinallyHere

After years living in student-y flats, we finally got a jobs and a (joint) mortgage on a lovely cottage in the country. Aga, roses round the door, the works. I bought a set matching storage jars to sit on the open shelving...

Which is how I came to make white sauce using icing sugar rather than flour without realising what had happened.

I served the food and went back to the kitchen for something. Came back to a slight atmosphere in the dining room.

One mouth full was enough to know what was wrong. They were all manfully continuing to eat.

Bread and cheese, and wine, lots of lovely wine it was then.

I once mistook polenta for powdered milk. Luckily I realised when it wasn’t dissolving. I now have a label maker.

[sofato5miles]

Turned up at a neighbour/ work colleague of my DH's for a dinner party of 8. High expectation as we had cancelled 2 high end restaurants for the meal as his wife wrote to us all that she wanted to host and 'do something special'. She is lovely but properly batshit crazy. Goofy genius type.

Anyeay, she opened the door in a food stained tshirt and trackie daks. I exclaimed 'Shit, you've been busy. I'll take over while you go get ready'. Well, she looked at me puzzled and assured me it was all fine, of course she was ready ☺️.

She then stayed in the kitchen, no sign of her DH, while we 6 sat in the living room dressed up, giggling as we heard the strains of "All by myself".

Sat down to a dinner that she didn't eat as 'on a keto diet' and her husband, the work colleague himself NEVER APPEARED as he was 'enjoying reading upstairs' However, she served a full plate for him for every course. My other mate was sat next the empty space trying not to laugh. We all roared with laughter when we walked home.

Everyone remained friends. They are just complete oddballs.

[ememem84]

I went to a wedding once which was absolutely slated by the rest of the guests.

The couple married at around 12 ish. Three on loads of wine bubbly and cocktails and canapés in the afternoon. Then at around 7/8 in the evening when we were all a bit pissed had the “wedding breakfast” which was just that. Full cooked breakfasts. With pastries. Toast. Hash browns. The works. It was ace.

[PussyMalanga]

Ah, "Fight Night" - the name we give to an infamous dinner party my friend hosted with his boyfriend. There were about seven of us - me, and several gay couples. My friend had also invited a lass he'd met randomly on a night out. She turned up drunk, and proceeded to slag everyone off using pretty awful homophobic language. My friend told her to leave, and on her way out she tripped and fell literally flat on her face. She ended up being carried out to a cab by two of the very gracious guys she had just called "f*gs" to their faces...

[ILoveYoga]

@jollygoose (goose instead of duck😁?)

For this reason my DH and I have never bought a whole duck again either though thankfully it was just us when we cooked a while duck. Stuck to buying breasts only from then onwards.

[Wormwoodgal]

Years ago DP and I were invited to dinner by lovely friends who are fantastic cooks. We ate outside in their beautiful garden, and all was delightful. However I had eaten something dodgy at lunchtime and soon after the starter began to feel very unwell indeed. Determined not to spoil the evening I covered up by excusing myself to go to the loo, throwing up comprehensively, lying on the bathroom floor moaning feebly, washing my face and returning to the table ready to join the sparkling conversation and eat the delicious main course. Then I started feeling wobbly again. This time I exclaimed I needed to take a peek at their baby asleep upstairs. After a refreshing lie down next to the cot I my way once again to the bathroom where I bade farewell to the main course. Back to the table, sparkle sparkle. On the way home (DP was driving thank goodness) he had to pull over a couple of times for me to be sick in the gutter. Classy. Later that night, after a home visit from the emergency doctor, I was taken by ambulance to hospital with acute gastroenteritis. Our lovely friends visited me there and were relieved to hear their dinner wasn’t to blame. We’re still good friends...

[MinnieAnonyMouse]

Went to a wedding one at quite a pricey venue which was in the middle of nowhere with no phone signal. Most of us were staying over. Couple get married at 12 noon. We all proceed to have several drinks and about 2, 3pm start feeling a bit nibbly. Two trays of canapes go through - everyone gets max 2 canapes. Then nothing. We notice the bridal party and family have vanished. Turns out they went for a sit down meal but didn't have enough money to feed the guests (because of expensive bloody venue). We're all tiddly and starving, no way of getting food in. The next food is served at 9pm at the evening do. I've never seen people run at a buffet before. For some bizarre reason, they'd only ordered food for (I would guess) half the guests so there was practically a brawl over the chicken nuggets. DH and I genuinely tried to work out if there was a takeaway in walking distance we were so hungry

[MrsMiaWallis]

I got really drunk by accident (host filling glasses and I was taking medication which didn't mix well with alcohol) ended up being sick in the host's downstairs loo.

She asked me if I'd been sick in front of a group of other mums at school pick up on the Monday.

I was so humiliated I lied and said No, but she said I know you were.

Mortified. Never spoke properly to her and her friends again.

[LLC283]

The worse I went to was a wedding reception. The wedding was an hour away from where the couple lived, literally in the middle of nowhere. We were invited to the reception only, but booked a hotel nearby (but turned out to be 15 minute drive away). I’d not long found out I was pregnant with our second so I couldn’t drink but unfortunately I don’t drive. We were there from 6pm and finished at midnight. No food was offered at all, not a slice of wedding cake, not a crisp, nothing. I’m was so hungry and was husband was very drunk and craved carbs. Once the wedding was finished and we waved the bride and groom away, we soon realised that the taxi company that was supposed to be there for the guests had only provided 3 taxis and not returned. We were phoning around but because the location was so remote no other taxi companies would come to us. We were miles from our hotel surrounded by fields and many miles from home. In the end we had to phone someone else who had attended the party and was half way home (his wife was driving) and ask them to please please pick us up. We got back to the hotel at 2am and couldn’t find anywhere that was open for food on the way back, tried local pizza places phone numbers there was nothing. Our hotel was above a pub but obviously at 2am it was shut and no vending machines so we went to bed so hungry. I couldn’t sleep. From that moment I always ensure I have snacks in the hotel room because I never want to go through that again

[SchrodingersMat]

I invited some friends over for dinner recently and they were two hours late. Won’t be invited back again that’s for sure!

[Babygotblueyes]

Not a dinner party but a meal I really wanted to impress with. I was meeting my partners sister and her DH for the first time as they came down to our city with their child and I really wanted to make a good impression. For various reasons we had agreed they were all going to go out for the day and I was going to stay home (BF was very proactive with house stuff, that was not usual- he was a better cook and housekeeper than me).

1. Had read you could make great sponges in the microwave. It was so overcooked it was crumbling. Had a cry then called my mum who suggested using it to make a trifle.
2. The joint I was cooking was on too high and the kitchen filled with smoke. Opened the windows, cut off the burned outside of the joint, mixed up a coating and put it back in on an appropriate temp. Put the potatoes on to parboil.
3. Went out to the landing outside our flat to check on the washing we used to put on the landing there. Because of the open windows, the door blew shut locking me out.
4. Had to climb through the open living room window to get back in. Potatoes had almost disintegrated by then.
5. Managed to drain them and form up some lumps to roast.
6. Had just collapsed in exhaustion when partner and crew came back and remarked on how relaxed I looked, while everything smelled so lovely. It did come out really well. I never told them......

[HotChocolateLover]

We had a couple over to ours and DH spent ages making a lovely starter and main with a dessert chilling in the fridge. They wolfed down the starter and then during the main, the woman went to the loo about 3 times. We all finished our meals and then they went ‘right, we’re off’ 🙄 😬 🤷‍♀️ No dessert, no thanks and drank about a bottle of wine each plus a cocktail each that DH had made. If they hadn’t have liked the food then they could have just said 😂 We didn’t hear from them again.

Anyhow, we saw the woman about three weeks ago funnily enough. And she said ‘we must meet up’ Both DH and I just said ‘no, we don’t want to’ practically in unison! Felt quite liberating actually.

[Bluntness100]

Zombie thread.

[Fluffycloudland77]

@Peanutbutteryogurt

About six years ago dp and I had dinner at dp's friends house with him and his partner. He cooked an absolutely delicious dinner. She spent the whole time slagging everything off, apologising to us about how bad the food was and got thoroughly pissed. It was very embarrassing.

Theyre still together, both cheat on each other, still hate each other. They now have a baby together!

Best case scenario given she cheats really. Dhs swinging colleagues wife wanted a baby. Who with was my first question.