AIBU to think this nurse should not have said this?

[Bluemooninmyeyes1]

So I went for an appointment with the nurse today to get the pill and after she weighed me she commented ‘wow you’ve put weight on since you were last here!’. To be honest I didn’t know what to say as the nurse who I normally see has never commented on my weight before so I tried to make a joke of it but I just felt really awkward. I know she’s right as I’ve been wfh since lockdown so I know I’ve put a few pounds on but I wouldn’t say I’ve massively obese or anything.

I’ve told my DH and he thinks I’m just being over sensitive and they probably have to tell me about any changes but I know my weight fluctuates a lot and no one has ever commented on it before.

YABU- she was right to have made the comment
YANBU- she should not have made the comment

I've put YANBU, but that's just for the way she said it. I imagine the weight gain is relevant from a medical perspective, but she should have said it in a kinder manner and offered you some support with it.

I think it's a case of "its not what she said but the way that she said it"

I've put in a stone in lockdown and actually sometimes someone else saying something has been the kick I've needed to lose weight.

Wasn't it a pill check too so weight is important.

The weight is relevant to the conversation you were having. If she really said it the way you heard it,of course she was wrong but is it possible you were already feeling sensitive about it and have projected a bit?

YANBU / I struggled with my weight for a 12 month period and the twice I went to my clinic they brought up my weight gain since my last appointment! First time the nurse looked at my scale and made a face and wrote down the obs and out loud said "weight gain"
The second time the nurse said there's a few extra pounds since last time but nothing we need to worry about!
It's not what they say it's the way in which it's said

She should have said it but not in that way , probably just thought that by being a bit jokey was taking the sting out of telling you but she misjudged it .

Depending on what pill you're getting, being overweight can have an impact on whether it's the best choice for you.

If that's exactly how you worded it, it is unprofessional. Was that really what she said, or have you paraphrased? Because honestly, you've made it out to be 100% unacceptable, whereas telling you you'd gained weight would be perfectly fine, if you get what I mean.

How much weight?

She should have been more diplomatic and supportive about it but excess weight is a big risk factor for lots of diseases and should be brought up if it's a concern.

It wouldn't bother me ... It's either a statement of fact or a mis-statement of fact. If it's a 'nasty you norty person' statement: that's her problem to think that way - that fat is something to be ashamed of, not my opinion to share or my problem prejudice to hold. All on her.

No, those were her exact words and she even looked at me after she said it waiting for a reaction, that’s why I made a stupid awkward joke about needing to lose some weight for an event next year and she just laughed. She didn’t actually say how much weight I’ve put on and I stupidly never thought to ask but I just wanted to get out ASAP. I do suffer a bit with my nerves so maybe I’m just being over sensitive.

Why wouldn’t she tell you ? It’s part of her job. She made an observation. Why are you so sensitive about it ?

Did she literally say 'wow'? She was right to raise weight gain especially in the context of an appointment about contraception but perhaps she could have said it differently.

Being weighed must have been part of your check up or whatever your attendance was for. I think it's fair enough she stated a fact. If not it seems like you would be none the wiser. At least now you are aware.

Yabu to not say bugger off to her, theres no need for a nurse to be rude and sarcastic she should support you not make comments !

We need to be more open about weight. I wish someone had said to me when I was bigger.

If you want to lose weight, do it for your health, not for some event. It's the latter that leads to yoyo dieting, which isn't good for you.

Yanbu.

If she was concerned about the potential impact on your pill/general health then she could have gone to the effort of taking your blood pressure, having a chat about your general health etc.

If she just wanted to make a snidey comment she should have kept her mouth shut. As it is she's made you feel rubbish without offering you any actual medical advice.

How she said it was a bit insensitive and hardly couched within a therapeutically helpful style.

I'm very aware if I've gained or lost weight. Most people know this stuff from, you know, mirrors and wearing their clothes tbh.