AIBU not to buy new colleagues Christmas presents?

[CockysGirl]

I recently started a new job in a big company but work in a small team of 9 including myself. They are all lovely and have welcomed me into the team but have all worked together for many years so I do feel a little bit of an outsider still.
Today two of my colleagues gave me lovely and rather expensive Christmas gifts which I am delighted with but slightly embarrassed as I hadn't planned on buying gifts for any of them. I have written cards but certainly hadn't budgeted for another 8 presents! AIBU not to buy any presents or should I just buy token presents for everyone?

Could you bring in something for everyone instead of doing individual presents? A nice cake or a box of chocolates or something so you're only spending £5-10 instead of £40?

Oh my good god. Its expected and then birthdays! I don't do this because it gets out of hand. Take it a tub of chocolates and write the note above. This constant sornding of other peoples money is so insensitive. I've bought my team mates some artisan bits this year but as a treat that I wanted to do. Not with the expectation of a present in return

Oh gosh this is tough. If it really is the done thing where you work and you’re new it’s really hard to just opt out. I’d go with home made sweets or similar I think. One year one of dh’s colleagues made up a load of flavoured vinegars - but am guessing you’d need to make them quite a bit earlier and also the cost of the bottles could add up.

This happens to me once, I bought 10 £1 scratch cards and we all did them together and we made a pact if there was any winnings we'd split them and one won £200 we went out for drinks!

I know this reflects badly on me, but just reading this is annoying. I really like the people in my team and we've worked together a long time, but we don't buy each other presents - and I'm more than fine with that. Cheap gifts often means buying tat that people don't really want, while anything over about £5-10 is unreasonable in terms of expectations.

Lots of posters are concerned about people being able to afford it. Well, that may be the worst aspect of this, but frankly I don't think anyone has a right to commandeer others' cash. I would seriously resent being expected to stump up all the time. Don't care if I'm considered stingy.

As for having to spend loads of time sourcing lovely thoughtful gifts for a fiver or baking treats and wrapping them up... great if you enjoy that, but let's be honest, it's going to be a chore for a lot of people.

(I'd also be wary of baking for people I didn't know well given the number of posters on MN who would bin any homemade food!)

I wish people who love things like this would consider that many others really don't want the bother and expense, and would be perfectly happy with everyone bringing in some sweets and cakes to share together.

It’s awkward, but I’d do nothing different to what you had planned. Thank them for their gifts, give them cards, put out chocolates if you wanted and leave it at that
No need to explain yourseld

I think you will have to get a different job op... 8 birthdays as well?! What's wrong with just getting a £3 cake on your own birthday and sharing with the team? As for the Xmas presents...for me it's be a choice between not buying anything, and getting a large tin of chocolates to share between everyone

Don't send letters or leave note about not joining in, it looks dreadful.

Just.. don't join in, or spend £2 or £3 for the entire team.

Scratch cards are a great idea

Thanks everyone for your support and ideas - I think I will make some festive biscuits and wrap them nicely for each of them - I don't want to be the Christmas grinch but feel a bit pressured into this - I don't even buy Christmas presents for my friends!
They are all lovely people and we are on similar salaries other than the 2 managers but from what I can see they all seem to have a lot of disposable income, new cars and kids in private schools - rather out of my league! I can only assume that their partners must be high earners or they have additional sources of income?
Better get cooking... 😊