Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Addiction to a video game!

4 replies

christmastime4120 · 05/12/2020 06:45

I’ll probably get flamed but here goes.

Oh of nearly a decade loves world of war craft. I know little about but it appears to be a game that never ends. Oh always says you can play for hours and still not complete anything - great. I’ve googled it and addition to WoW is a real thing that many have suffered from.

When we first met he was on it all the time and had been addicted for many years prior. Admittedly he has a good job and is hard working. But her stay up until the early hours, play it for hours on end and go to work tired. For the nights he couldn’t stay awake he would get up really early to play. If we went out at the weekends he’d be gagging to get home and play. It also affects his mood, I’m sure of it. Probably a mix of the tiredness and actually from the game.

On paper he’s a great man. He’s hard working, he’s worked in the same job for 15 years, is a great hands on father to our two dc, he is supportive, he cooks but he does bugger all around the house.

Anyway, a year or so into our relationship he gave it up. I think he was recognising it was too much. He still played video games but they weren’t like wow - not so addictive. No problems.

But a few months ago he started playing again. I raised my concerns over it as it caused problems last time. He said he wasn’t going to play it much this time.

However, here we are again. Still he is going to work, being a great dad but often at the weekends particularly at the weekends during lockdown as we had nothing to do, he would spend hours on it. He spends evenings on it too. Normally we would go to bed same time but now he’s up and down on wow and wants a pc in our bedroom.

It negatively affects his mood. He denies it but I notice he’s more short tempered when in a game.

Aibu to be pissed off? I try talking to him about it and he says things like would you rather me go pub then I’d be out rather than staying in playing games (maybe I would prefer if he went out sometimes). Says he needs something to do when he’s bored - I could think of loads that needs doing around the house.

I don’t have the time to sit around playing games for hours on end.

It hasn’t really affected his parenting. He takes the kids to school around his hours, he bathes them, cooks, he takes them out for walks but it’s the in between bits.

Last weekend he spent about 5 hours on it continuously one afternoon as we were all home that day and had nothing to do plus the extra time he managed on it too.

I’m really miserable. Aibu? I sound like a nagging wife but he seems to have forgot the issues we had the first time. It’s not got that bad yet but he give it up as it wasn’t healthy!

I just feel a bit neglected.

Like he said it’s the game that never ends so it’s difficult to turn off.

OP posts:
NekoShiro · 05/12/2020 10:43

It never ends because it a huge open world mmorpg where you play quests which reset everyday and do dungeon boss fights for the chance to get rare loot. A new expansion to the game has come out recently which is probably why he's started playing again, does he have friends that play it with him online?

You said when you first met he was on it all the time, we're you not okay with it then? Have you tried playing it with him, you'd be spending time together then.

I'm biased though cus me and my partner both enjoy playing video games, last night we played for 4 hours before bed, he's was practicing with his friends for a league of legends tournament that happens tonight and I was playing an mmorpg that I love.

Could you talk to him about maybe only playing on certain days for a certain amount of time? Also emotions run high while playing videogames so I'm not surprised he seems short when he plays games, also he might be being short because he's doing something he has really enjoyed before your relationship and you're negative about it (which is perfectly fine to be, don't misunderstand) I just think you guys really need to keep talking towards something that works for you both. Maybe a night a week that just for you two to spend time together doing something together.

Oh and side note about him being addicted, personally I only see people being addicted to videogames when it is a detriment to their lives or responsibilities, there was a couple in America whose baby died because they were to busy playing games to take care of them and there was a guy on China who died because he hadn't left his computer for weeks and starved to death. If he's still going to work and showering and looking after kids then I wouldn't say it's an addiction.

Oh and I think it would help if you learnt how the game works, cus then you can ask him to turn the game off after he finishes his current Raid or quest etc

lovepickledlimes · 05/12/2020 11:06

@NekoShiro I would say it is effecting his responsibilities as a partner if it means he is in a bad mood, making him overly tired meaning he can't spend quality time with his partner, or rushing home when they are meant to be having a nice family day out etc. Also it seems OP is implying house projects could do with being done. The up keep of the house should not rest only on OPs shoulder.

lovepickledlimes · 05/12/2020 11:08

Also I would like to add both me and fiancé game together, however we both make sure it does not cut into quality time together or make one of us too tired

vivienrose · 17/10/2023 08:25

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread