Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or is my neighbour about parking

50 replies

Ifimoveyoumove · 02/12/2020 14:05

I’m having recurring problems with one neighbour about parking, not sure if she is BU or I am. I’ve made a diagram but I suspect it might make my post less clear Grin the diagram shows how we are now parked.

We all live in quite small 1930s semis. Each pair of houses has a joint dropped curb leading onto narrow drives, and then a small-ish curb in between the next pair of houses. One of the long buses drives down one side of the street every 20 minutes so we all park on the other side when parking on the street because the bus can’t easily weave between parked cars on both sides.

Most people, including me (yellow house) park on our drives. Sometimes, like today when I have a plumber over, I’ll park on the street and leave my drive free for easier access to tools etc. A couple of weeks ago I parked next to the curb (green in the diagram) outside neighbour (pinks) house. I parked in the middle because the curbs are quite short and I didn’t want my car to stick out too much on either end and make it hard for the cars on the drive to get out. Also, the curb is so small I’ve never seen two cars parked on any of them, everyone else parks one car in the middle. Neighbour (pink) came over and asked me to ‘be more considerate’ and park right up to the edge of her dropped kerb so she could squeeze in her car on the street as well. she only has one car which she parks on her drive but wanted to have the option to move it onto the street overnight. She was also rude. She didn’t introduce herself or say please or thank you, just demanded I ‘be more considerate’. I was annoyed but I stayed pleasant throughout. I apologised for the inconvenience, introduced myself, moved my car and I’ve avoided parking near her house since.

Today I had to park there again (and will need to for a while, gas pipe maintenance has blocked our drives). I parked as close to the dropped curb as possible as she had asked last time. Within minutes she rang my doorbell, asking me to move again. I asked her why and she said she’d like to park across her own dropped curb but the drive on her side wasn’t as wide as her car so she wanted part of the car to be where I had parked (legally). Again she was rude and aggressive. I got annoyed and I said that whilst I was willing to move my car, I was doing so as a favour and I expected to be asked politely. If she wants to reserve the space outside her house then she needs to say that clearly, as I work from home and cannot move my car every time she changes her mind. I moved my car. She parked hers. She got out of her car and said ‘don’t do it again’ and flounced into her house. I am so annoyed. I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong but I’m really second guessing myself and it makes me feel nervous about parking near her house again.

AIBU or is my neighbour about parking
OP posts:
EnjoyingTheSilence · 02/12/2020 14:07

Ignore her. Whatever you do will be wrong.

If you need to park there, do so. When she comes over complaining (which she will do) ignore her. You don’t have to stand and listen to her, just close the door and walk away.

Sooooooembarrassed · 02/12/2020 14:09

YANBU - What you did wrong was moving the second time

helloxhristmas · 02/12/2020 14:10

Smile nod ignore. Or tell her to fuck off!

Ifimoveyoumove · 02/12/2020 14:13

Oh thank god. I thought I was breaking some unspoken rule about how considerate people park

OP posts:
CoffeeRunner · 02/12/2020 14:14

She’s being a twat. IMO you were right the first time, when you parked allowing room for driveways to be used. I’d go back to doing that & ask her to call the council or Police if she thinks you’re parked illegally Wink.

billybagpuss · 02/12/2020 14:15

Park legally, don’t answer the doorbell.

SpamIAm · 02/12/2020 14:16

Oh I'm really annoyed you moved for her! Park where you want in future and ignore her requests to move.

Yeahnahmum · 02/12/2020 14:18

Ignore the doorbell next time. You may park there as she may f*ck off. What a nasty person

liveitwell · 02/12/2020 14:23

She sounds like an absolute knob who's making a thing of something that needn't be given she's got one car and one drive.

Next time goes out, move your car there. Then ignore her when she comes over. The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up for yourself. You're entitled to park there, especially as you can't access your drive atm.

billy1966 · 02/12/2020 14:23

OP,
YABU....to move YOUR car for someone so rude..TWICE. 🙄

You are legally parked.
I would generally be very accommodating towards my neighbours but I would NOT tolerate that sort of rudeness from anyone.
Flowers

DynamoKev · 02/12/2020 14:24

10/10 good diagram would read again.

YANBU

Roundtoedshoes · 02/12/2020 14:26

Park there every single day until the end of time and ignore her. So upset you moved the car!

WiddlinDiddlin · 02/12/2020 14:28

So, occasion 1 you were in the wrong and should have parked so that two cars can fit, however I can see why you did that.

Occasion 2 she was absolutely in the wrong and she may have a driveway that has a dropped kerb however she CANNOT park across a dropped kerb, hers, anyones. She does not own the dropped kerb, it is there to give her access and prevent damage to the pavement.

Next time she comes to shout at you, point that out very sweetly that it is illegal to park across a dropped kerb on a pavement, regardless of who paid for that dropped kerb or whose drive it accesses.

Sunshineandflipflops · 02/12/2020 14:36

I think people can get precious about the space outside their house and think it's theirs. YANBU.

Esspee · 02/12/2020 14:37

Why did you move the second time? I suggest you make a point of parking there to establish that it is a public space to which she has no entitlement.

Mummyoflittledragon · 02/12/2020 14:41

Next time I hope you will say no and shut the door in her face!

WhereverIGoddamnLike · 02/12/2020 14:41

Why do you keep moving your car for her? Grow a back bone and say no. You've parked legally and you're also not parking too close to dropped kerbs because you dont want to limit visibility and manoeuvring space for your neighbours. But she comes and basically barks an order at you and you do it? Are you generally a people pleaser no matter how rude they are to you?

She does not own the street.

KihoBebiluPute · 02/12/2020 14:43

You shouldn't have moved your car, it will only feed her sense of entitlement. All on-street parking is "first come first served" and no-one has any rights to reserve or have priority over any part of it.

Funnyface1 · 02/12/2020 14:46

I definitely wouldn't have moved for her the second time. She doesn't own the street and it doesn't sound like she really needed to park there, just felt like being awkward.

I'd be a bit more forceful next time, she won't be expecting it.

TreestumpsAndTrampolines · 02/12/2020 14:49

We lived somewhere similar for a bit. There wasn't really room for 2 cars, unless one person parked a bit over a dropdown (which sometimes people did, and we all rubbed along as it was normally still OK to get out, if a bit tricky)

She really doesn't have a leg to stand on anyway - but if she's the aggressive type, probably best to steer clear if you can incase she does something to the car. Yes, you could stand up to her, but it's probably not worth the hassle.

Ilovesugar · 02/12/2020 14:50

Argh I’m so annoyed on your behalf! People don’t own the roads outside their houses unless it’s a private road. She sounds like a cock womble

Ifimoveyoumove · 02/12/2020 14:53

Thanks everyone! I would love to passive aggressively park there everyday (she never uses it) but I’m a bit of a wuss so I won’t. As a few posters mentioned, I do actually worry about parking so close to the dropped kerb as I’m afraid I’m blocking people or visibility and the rest of the street thinks I’m a parking wanker

OP posts:
NoProblem123 · 02/12/2020 14:54

As soon as you said she was rude, all bets are off.
Normally my advice is to build neighbourly relations and work together but I’m now annoyed that you’ve let her be rude to you TWICE.
As PP - park and ignore the doorbell.

FedUpAtHomeTroels · 02/12/2020 15:07

Park where you like, even in the spot she thinks is hers. Next time she rings, answer the door, say "No" and close the door. She's rude and entitled.

Nottherealslimshady · 02/12/2020 15:15

YABU to move your legally parked car twice for someone who could park on their own drive but wants to be spiteful.

Park in the middle of the dropped Krebs because you're right, you're obstructing peoples view and turning to be so close to their drive. If she does it again just say "no, sorry, can't, you'll have to park on your drive"