Midwife not very responsive

[Meganalice]

Hi everyone,

Met my midwife once, she was really nice and answered all my worries. We got on well and I also work for the nhs so we shared some work moans.

However I don’t know if she was a little “too comfortable” with me, said she’s “been doing the job 30 years she has had enough and wanted to go and work in Waitrose”. Also said “I am human and I do have days off so don’t expect to contact me 24/7”. Fair enough comment but I’m not stupid and I would only contact her during working hours.

Anyway, since our appointment I’ve tried to contact her a few times one day about some pain I had been getting and just wanted some reassurance or some advice of what to do. She never text or called me back so I called EPU. EPU advised me to monitor the pain and if anymore comes of it go to a&e as could be a sign of ectopic pregnancy.

Luckily nothing came from it and baby was in the right place when I had my scan, but I feel a bit cross with my midwife she never bothered to follow up my query. In fact, it’s been 4 days now and she still hasn’t bothered getting back to me!

Do you think I am expecting too much or her and I’m being needy or should I be asking to change midwife? This is my first pregnancy and I feel like I need some more support.

Has anyone else found this with their midwife? X

Thanks everyone for their different opinions and experiences. Thank you to everyone that is understanding where I’m coming from and has reassured me I’m not just being a drama queen and understands the lack of response and feeling a bit lost. Just a bit of communication from her would be nice or acknowledgement she’s read or seen my missed call. It’s just polite, I am under her care and she has said “contact me if you need me”, so when I have contacted her as she has advised, it’s human nature to expect a response.

@Millly 1994 - remember she's probably supporting people through late pregnancy loss, long labours and home births - and she probably has a case load that is only just manageable.

Everyone saying contact the team of midwives. Like the OP some of us are told to contact the specific midwife personally.

@ExclamationPerfume

Everyone saying contact the team of midwives. Like the OP some of us are told to contact the specific midwife personally.

I understand that. I'm saying that's a daft system and if you can bypass it by finding a number for the central team that would be my advice. Of course they may just fob you off and tell you to keep trying one individual but if it means you do get to speak to someone when you need to then it's worth a try.

I’m 28 weeks and haven’t even seen a midwife yet - just had phone calls - will be going to first real life appointment next week

I’ve never even spoken to the same person nor will I see the same person at my future appointments

I think you expect to much from this woman - have you been given a General phone number at your hospital that you phone for questions/emergencies? That’s who you should call x

I think she was joking about working in Waitrose.

My NW was awful for responding by text. Tbf she was busy and sometimes on AL. You hit any queries just phone elsewhere 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Mw*

Have not hit 🤦🏻‍♀️