Bloody Elf turns up in a balloon now

[DressingGownofDoom]

I know IABU and a curmudgeon but why does everything have to be such an exhibition at Christmas? Elves can't just appear this year they have to float from Lapland in a balloon with a present I know, I know if you don't like it don't do it. That's fine but I do feel sorry for the kids whose parents don't have £15 to spend on an elf balloon and then a present on top just because it's the first of December. I thought this year might make us all step back and maybe consider a simpler celebration of Christmas but no, the social media onslaught of who can be the most ostentatious Christmas fanatic is worse than ever. I hate it.

We have an elf, however he’s an artisanal one crocheted out of reclaimed lentils and stuffed with quinoa.

But yet, I rent...

I don’t know where I stand here!

If you are middle class you take Luca and Sophia to Lapland to ride in a sleight, see real reindeer and Santa’s workshop.
The advent calendar will be paper doors with pretty Christmas scenes as heaven forbid any chocolate is eaten.
No Christmas Eve box but then you wouldn’t have the time to do hot chocolate and watch a Christmas movie as you will be late getting back from the Christmas market and who needs more food when you are stuffed full of stollen.
Santa brings them wooden educational toys and you buy a goat for them from grandma and grandpa’s Christmas money..

If you are lower class or sub lower class you Jayden and Ellie may help stick tacky lights to the front of your rented hovel. You might even have an inflatable Santa dressed as Bart Simson or projector with Christmas scenes.
On the 1st the Poundland elf arrives with a chocolate advent calendar and spends 3 weeks hiding in the fridge or sitting by the 70 inch tv screen.
Christmas morning they open shed loads of plastic tat and then nan and grandad arrive with even more.

There a simple guide so no one fails to comply with the MN guide to maintain class standards at Christmas .

Crikey I'm fairly new to mumsnet and am astonished at the class war about an elf. Imho sm is the problem here. We all have different traditions . Surely elfs don't have to cost money . ? It's the posting on Facebook etc.. just a reminder folks only post what they want to you see !! Enjoy your family and your little traditions with or without an elf .

@Paddingtonthebear

WTF has renting got to do with it? Does it make someone a lesser person?!

Ironically, our rent is twice the amount of most of our friends mortgage repayments.

Exactly!!!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 I've reported that user's horrendously ignorant comment

Crikey I'm fairly new to mumsnet and am astonished at the class war about an elf.

Get used to it. Check out some Christmas Eve box threads if you really want to see what we can do...

I bloody hate those elfs.
Knowing this my MIL got my DC one and said it was to make sure they were good for Santa. He stayed for 3 days and then disappeared for ever leaving a note saying what good children they were and that he had seen enough to know they would never belong on the naughty list.
Should have seen MILES face when my excited children told her this

This is brilliant the post above me.

@LastChristmas20

Well I'm about to break some hearts.

I live in a very naice Surrey suburb.

University educated.

My TV isn't even wall mounted.

Work full time.

Claim no benefits.

And still fucking love seeing my 7 year old squeal with delight when she saw her elf back this morning.

We rather unceremoniously put it in the Christmas tree.

But sorry - I'll tell her she's too middle class for such scummy nonsense and put a swift end to the magic and happiness it brings her!

(Also - will horrify some - my business owner, more than full time working, husband - does far more of the elaborate elf situations than I do)

What a load of miserable snobby trollops some of you are.

Miserable snobby trollops you say? I feel a new username coming on

@princessnutnut sorry wont post again . Will stick to the happy boards

@TheKeatingFive Don’t forget you must list reading the Night Before Christmas as one of your Christmas traditions. That is the naice middle class thing to

Oh god I didn't even realise I was middle class. My working class parents will be so pleased. It's a Christmas miracle 😂
For what it's worth I do elf on the shelf with DS. I enjoy seeing his little face light up every morning (or every 3rd morning😉) when he sees what the elf has been up too. I own my home incase anyone was wondering, it's not a 'class' thing, if you don't wanna do it don't do it. If you do then do, it really is that simple🤷‍♀️

[quote Madonnawiththebigboobies]**@princessnutnut **sorry wont post again . Will stick to the happy boards [/quote]
Oh don't get me wrong, we are at our happiest when declaring how middle class our Christmas habits are!

@LastChristmas20, pity someone with a University education and is as you describe still uses an outdated sexist insult as trollop to other women.

Hahah @DressingGownofDoom

I would be most honoured. I'm not sure I've ever used the word "trollop" before today, but once it pinged into my head I was too amused not to.

Glad to see the Christmas threads are well and truly underway on MN.

Cheers to you all. May you enjoy your evening sorting elves or not.

I can't be the only person who quite enjoys making some stupid elf tricks up, can i?

I mean I'm very boringly MC, masters educated mortgage shackled so maybe I'm doing the elf wrong to actually enjoy doing silly stuff. None of it costs money....just imagination and 5 minutes of being a bit subversive and childish 🤷‍♀️

@princessnutnut *I'm maybe confused by the irony. I was trying to say that regardless of class(as a pp adhered to )that if you have your little family traditions then good on you . Christmas is all about tradition , family and love . My only observation was Facebook etc doesn't play a good part in the competitnous of this .

[quote Ponoka7]@LastChristmas20, pity someone with a University education and is as you describe still uses an outdated sexist insult as trollop to other women.[/quote]
Just googled the meaning! Didn't know it was quite that severe.

In my head it was an old moaning woman.

Apologies for the mis-use.

Anyway. As you were Christmas haters.

I’ve never done Elf on the Shelf (eldest is 12, youngest 6). I’m not particularly against it, it’s just never appealed to me.

What with advent calendars (which I enjoy getting a nice one), Christmas jumpers usually given at the same time as there are bound to be uses required of them throughout December, a minimal Xmas Eve box with PJs, maybe chocolate etc, and presents on Xmas day, that feels like enough. Then there’s decorating the tree and the house, going to see Xmas lights locally, maybe a Xmas trail, and that seems like plenty.

However I’m not against the elf if some feel like it - others probably don’t do some of the traditions I enjoy!

fastandthecurious I have to read the night before Christmas even if no one wants me to! I’m not doing it to be middle class - probably more because I enjoy the sound of my own voice!

Our elf came with a balloon this year. Why the hell not?! Although he wasn’t actually in the balloon. It cost £20 and made my children happy. We started the elf late after pestering why they didn’t have one when all of their classmates do so figured we’d give them a few years of joy from the naughty elf.

FYI me and DH are decent (not night but above average) earners, own our home, both have 2 degrees/masters, a 32 inch TV not on a wall and are generally considered middle class by others.

@TheKeatingFive

Celebrating the birth of Christ actually, if you want to get back to basics.

I think you’ll find Christmas pre-dates Christianity.

No it doesn't. That's why it's called Christmas. I agree that other celebrations (including Yule) do though.

i agree that other celebrations (including Yule) do though.

Christmas piggybacked off already established mid winter celebrations such as Yule.

@haircutsRus I don't think any of the wise men brought fir trees or flat screen TVs to Bethlehem!

If you are middle class you take Luca and Sophia to Lapland to ride in a sleight, see real reindeer and Santa’s workshop.
The advent calendar will be paper doors with pretty Christmas scenes as heaven forbid any chocolate is eaten.
No Christmas Eve box but then you wouldn’t have the time to do hot chocolate and watch a Christmas movie as you will be late getting back from the Christmas market and who needs more food when you are stuffed full of stollen
.Santa brings them wooden educational toys and you buy a goat for them from grandma and grandpa’s Christmas money..

If you are lower class or sub lower class you Jayden and Ellie may help stick tacky lights to the front of your rented hovel. You might even have an inflatable Santa dressed as Bart Simson or projector with Christmas scenes.
On the 1st the Poundland elf arrives with a chocolate advent calendar and spends 3 weeks hiding in the fridge or sitting by the 70 inch tv screen.
Christmas morning they open shed loads of plastic tat and then nan and grandad arrive with even more.

I'm very confused now. Mumsnet has previously told me my children's names are chav lower class and we do have lots of lights on our house and around our sex pond hot tub. The children love plastic tat and the in laws feat. Nana do bring a shedload more.

However our home is owned, we'd planned a trip to Lapland, the advent calendars are wooden with magnets, Grandma and Grandpa buy educational toys and our TV is tiny.
Oh and our Elves are from Ebay and previously I tried to do the elf in a balloon with a condom which deflated over night and left two shrink wrapped elves in obvious condoms. My teens found it hilarious.

I haven’t read the thread. Don’t intend to. The comment about the renting parents made me mad so I will skip 12 pages.
What I will say though to the OP who felt sorry for kids whose parents can’t or don’t do this. My son went to school today directly from my parents having had to sleep there last night )support bubble before anyone goes Covid crazy)
He got his elf, complete with balloon advent calendar and a cake when he got home from school. I asked him if his friends got elves this morning and he said he didn’t know because they didn’t talked about it. By the time they get to school after the excitement in the morning they just get on with their day. They don’t stand round chatting. It’s schoolwork then break and that means footy.

and we do have lots of lights on our house and around our sex pond hot tub

Well if you have a sex pond you’re some kind of filthy underclass - happy to clear that up.

If there’s one thing Mumsnetters look down on more than elves, it’s filthy sex ponds.

previously I tried to do the elf in a balloon with a condom which deflated over night and left two shrink wrapped elves in obvious condoms. My teens found it hilarious.

😂