To expect dh to NOT have random female friends on facebook!!

[mosschops30]

Yes ok I know I probably am. But dh has a woman on his facebook friends that I dont know (apparently shes 'some bird in work') and now he's friends with his brothers ex who moved back to australia 5 years ago! She sent him a message and he replied saying 'how could I forget you'!!! He doesnt mention me or the fact that we have kids, and she doesnt mention me either.

Now admittedly I have lots of male friends on facebook but I have always had lots of male friends and dh always says that men and women cant be friends because men are always thinking about sex with that female!

So am I being irrational or not.

Plus he doesnt even want to be my friend on facebook (not that I'm bothered)

i think it's weird you aren't friends with each other...otherwise maybe he just thinks that his porevious idea of not being able to be friends with opposite sex is old fashioned..I have friends on facebook of both sexes and i don't think I've had sex with any of them and quite probably won't be

I find the whole Facebook/MySpace thing very worrying. People might think YABU but I would be exactly the same. It just opens up a whole web of insecurities that wouldn't be there otherwise.

strange he doesnt even mention you or your dcs

My dh has never really had female friends since I've known him. He works in a very blokey job and just doesn't meet females but since joining facebook he's found loads of old schoolfriends (girls) on there. I found it a bit odd to start with but it's only facebook. Perhaps he doesn't mention you and the kids because it's personal info that he doesn't want the whole world to see. Lots of people keep it quite vague on sites like that.

i dont think there can be anything wrong with speaking with his brothers ex who lives a million miles away.

the other woman probably is "some bird from work" who wants to make her friends list a little longer so added him.

i woudl be pretty offended if i added someone as a friend and they refused. so he was probably just being polite.

tbh its nto like having her added as a friend measn anything. it jsut shows her face there, nothing more.

it's only a utility it doesn't actually change who you are or how you think..some people as you know have loads of friends and stick everyone on and others just keep it close

I have an ex husband and an ex boyfriend on my fb friends, there's nothing remotely sinister about it, I am extremely happily married, it doesn't mean anything and dh is welcome to look at my fb friend any time he likes.

I think it is unreasonable to have male friends on there, but not to want him to have female ones.

But I think your DH has weakened his case with his "men and women cant be friends because men are always thinking about sex with that female" comment.

And I can understand why you are annoyed that he doesn't mention you or your DCs.

So, after pondering the evidence for almost a whole minute, I find in favour of mosschops.

thanks HC

he cant use the excuse of not wanting evryone to see his info, this was private messages in his inbox.

In his defence he did let me read it

Facebook is protected by a login and password, so if he wanted to hide anything nefarious from you it would be pretty easy to do so. The fact that he hasn't suggests he has no such intentions.