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AIBU?

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Original poster

Shouted at for not wearing my mask outside 😔

239 replies

Dandylioness1 · 30/11/2020 15:16

I took my son for a walk at lunch time.
We drove to a nearby park that I haven’t been to many times before.

We were walking and the path became very Narrow.

A couple were walking towards me, it was impossible for us to pass with a 2m
distance it was more like 1m.

It was such a brief encounter and I’d passed other people on the same path with no concerns.

However the female in this couple put her hand out and told me to stop, she began to shout at me for not wearing my mask.

She told me I must not walk past her unless I have my mask on as I’m putting her at risk and I’m ignorant. ☹️

I did have my mask in my bag but I’ve never worn it outside before and especially if it’s just a brief passing, as this was.

The woman was so bloody rude to me I could feel myself getting upset.

I put my mask on and they walked past us.

The thing is they wouldn’t have been face to face with me and it was such a short time for them to pass me.

I honestly feel so upset about this and it’s the first time anyone has ever refused to walk past me outdoors because I don’t have a mask on.

Am I in the wrong?

OP posts:
LongDistanceClaret · 30/11/2020 18:09

I bet she wouldn’t have said it if you were a man. She sounds like a bully.

Impatiens · 30/11/2020 18:09

Except sadly, it happens more often than you think, I've seen it a lot locally over the last month or so and we arent even in lockdown where I am in scotland. Round here, even people with exemptions are being terrorised by the covid warriors.

Well all I can say is I must live in a very tolerant area! I go out with my dog every day, never had a single issue since the first lockdown. Yesterday I went all round the park and through town centre, no one was being hostile. In fact everyone seemed to be very relaxed and enjoying the sunshine.

SleepingStandingUp · 30/11/2020 18:09

@Janegrey333 even if you're going house car park car house? I can understand around town between shops, or school run on the bus (I put mine on as I get on the bus to go and take it off once I've decided I'm not going in the local shop to come back) but why would you walk around a park in a mask?

CloudyVanilla · 30/11/2020 18:09

Haven't RTFT.

If for any reason she is feeling particularly anxious about the virus or feels particularly vulnerable to the virus, to the point where she would feel the need to shout at a complete stranger outdoors, then she needs to be the one taking further preventative measures to avoid people

To be honest she sounds unhinged and looking for a confrontation. I had similar in a supermarket during the first lockdown when they had only just introduced the supermarket measures including the one way system. A woman insisted I had walked the wrong way. I actually absolutely hadn't and could double check by checking the aisle numbers. Just smiled and nodded and went on with my day.

Some people are just waiting for the tiniest excuse to blow up at people; I don't know how they can live that way.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 30/11/2020 18:10

I’d have pushed her into the hedge personally😂

IrmaFayLear · 30/11/2020 18:10

Can anyone supply a useful comeback for these types? (Not abusive!!)

When I was shouted at I just sort of winced and hurried on, and I feel I shouldn’t have let the nasty idiots get away with such unpleasantness. They no doubt felt fully justified and were puffed up with their own importance, but they left me quite shaken.

Kokosrieksts · 30/11/2020 18:11

Just smile and wave next time :)

FreezeFloodlit · 30/11/2020 18:12

I think I'd have involuntarily laughed. Clearly she was feeling very anxious which is actually sad, but she's the one who should be adjusting her behaviour and expectations, not you.

I hope your son is a baby too young to be upset by someone shouting at his mother.

CloudyVanilla · 30/11/2020 18:13

And OP I agree when I do the school run in the mornings which at the moment is basically the only time I go outside near people, everyone wears their masks near the school but walking the streets where everyone has dispersed, no one wears their masks walking around in the open air.

As far as I'm aware there is no reason to wear a mask in open air and we have actually never been told of any benefits to wearing the mask in open air if not near people or touching equipment

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 30/11/2020 18:14

I'm sorry you had this crap experience.

I expect she is usually in the polite police or busying herself spying on her neighbours but as there isn't much going on, she has moved on to interpreting the COVID rules as she sees fit and shouting at random people for not wearing masks.

She may well pick the wrong person to shout at...

HyacynthBucket · 30/11/2020 18:18

MrGrinch [shocked]
You could do with cultivating a little empathy for those less able than yourself. The vulnerable still need to get out and have exercise, and it would not hurt others to keep to the 2m distance as we have all been advised to do. If you see someone ahead on a narrow path, stand aside for them and let them feel safe.

ktp100 · 30/11/2020 18:21

That's ridiculous!! You could have just walked facing away from each other for 2 seconds, surely?!!

I was really surprised to see 2 receptionists & 2 mechanics just chatting merrily and sitting on top of each other in the garage I took my car to for an MOT today. I really don't think it would hurt people who are facing the public to wear a mask. You're not telling me all 4 of them were exempt!!

Goosefoot · 30/11/2020 18:23

@CloudyVanilla

And OP I agree when I do the school run in the mornings which at the moment is basically the only time I go outside near people, everyone wears their masks near the school but walking the streets where everyone has dispersed, no one wears their masks walking around in the open air.

As far as I'm aware there is no reason to wear a mask in open air and we have actually never been told of any benefits to wearing the mask in open air if not near people or touching equipment

The mask around the school doesn't really make any sense either.I think that is the kind of thing that encourages people to think it's helpful or necessary, and people who don't wear masks outside are lax.
fairydust11 · 30/11/2020 18:24

@Dandylioness1 you are not in the wrong.
How awful. You shouldn’t have to deal with someone shouting at you like that. Try not to let it upset you. 💐

cansu · 30/11/2020 18:27

You should have told her to walk around you or go back. She is being completely ridiculous.

frogface69 · 30/11/2020 18:27

Ooh another mask thread.
Ticks off on MN bingo. And a cross cos it’s a good un.

fussychica · 30/11/2020 18:32

Good Lord! Some people are so vile to people who they think won't answer back but as others have said, bet she would never have said it to a burly bloke. You did nothing wrong not wearing a mask outside, assuming you are in UK. If she's that worried about meeting people without a mask she needs to walk in a quieter place or at a quieter time.

BBCONEANDTWO · 30/11/2020 18:38

She might not have been so brave had her partner not been with her - or if your partner was with you.

She's an ignorant rude woman.

user1481840227 · 30/11/2020 18:49

I'm not buying this being scared nonsense......I don't know anyone who wears a mask outside so if she's going on walks with narrow paths then she would have already encountered other people and did the exact same thing to them. If she was so scared about passing people who don't wear masks then she should have stayed in or been more careful about where she goes walking!

She was clearly the ignorant person, for all she knew you might be exempt anyway even if indoors and yet she still thought it was ok to shout at you!

donquixotedelamancha · 30/11/2020 18:55

Why did you acquiesce to this lunatic? Tell her to mind her own bloody business and you'll walk where you like.

The only thing you did wrong was giving in to her. I would have told her to bugger off stop being so ridiculous and then continued on my mask-free way.

You opened your bag, rummaged in it for your mask, put it on and then walked past her? Why??? If she was that bothered she should've turned back. Jesus.

Oh come on. IRL I am considered bolshie but I don't react with aggression to strangers.

Very few of us would have the presence of mind to say no in a way which avoids escalating the situation. It's not a big deal to put your mask on- not least because she sounds quite unwell and going along with it is probably the kinder and easier thing, despite being frustrating.

jessstan1 · 30/11/2020 18:56

The woman was a nutcase. Forget her.

user1481840227 · 30/11/2020 18:58

@IrmaFayLear

Can anyone supply a useful comeback for these types? (Not abusive!!)

When I was shouted at I just sort of winced and hurried on, and I feel I shouldn’t have let the nasty idiots get away with such unpleasantness. They no doubt felt fully justified and were puffed up with their own importance, but they left me quite shaken.

I suppose you could just tell someone they have no right to try to intimidate people and that shouting was more likely to spread covid further in the air so if anyone was guilty of anything it was him!!!
user1481840227 · 30/11/2020 19:01

Very few of us would have the presence of mind to say no in a way which avoids escalating the situation. It's not a big deal to put your mask on- not least because she sounds quite unwell and going along with it is probably the kinder and easier thing, despite being frustrating.

Some people can't wear masks though and she may put them in a very upsetting and embarrassing situation if she thinks she has the right to go like that!
Or she could bump into an anti-masker who might be very quick to react to her...so I don't think going along with it is necessarily the right thing to do because that just enables her to keep going around laying down the law!

Fcuk38 · 30/11/2020 19:01

I would have just said you didn’t have a mask with you as your outside and if she doesn’t like it then she can jog on in the different direction.

RaspberryCoulis · 30/11/2020 19:03

I wear my mask outside. Most other people do as well.

No they don't!