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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To isolate before Christmas

34 replies

CitizenofEurope · 29/11/2020 11:47

AIBU to take the DCs out of school one week early to allow us to meet grandparents on Christmas day?

I am trying to weigh it up. GPs are late 80’s, MIL has the early stages of dementia, she is ECV and has been shielding. She absolutely adores her DGC’s. They live about 40 miles away and FIL will drive them over for the day on Xmas day for pressies and lunch. I would love to have them and it will be a lovely day. DCs also adore their GPs and DH really wants his parents to come - he thinks it likely that this might be his last xmas with his mum.

However, DCs are really happy at school. Academically they are ahead so I have no qualms about that, but I know they are really looking forward to the whole school Christmas thing (Reception and year 2) - although they will both get to do their xmas plays the week before.

They will also miss a swimming lesson and brownies ( ok not a big deal maybe but swimming lessons are only starting up again on 5 dec for the first time since march. DD will also miss the first chance to do her hobby since the summer.

They will then be stuck at home for 14 days in the run up to xmas while I try and keep them occupied...

Is it fair on the DCs to miss 14 days of running up to xmas for 1 day with the GPs. ( although will try and do xmas fun at home too...)

WWYD?

OP posts:
Peace43 · 29/11/2020 11:48

That is our family plan. Vulnerable grandparents.

DonLewis · 29/11/2020 11:49

Rightly or wrongly, I'm considering the same. I bet loads of people are and I bet schools will be half empty (I mean, the schools my kids have been to are half empty at the best of times because there's always so many kids and teachers out self isolating anyway!)

Redlocks30 · 29/11/2020 11:53

I’m considering doing the same.

I would imagine the schools will be very very empty that last week. If that is as I predict, no new learning will be missed.

LividJamas · 29/11/2020 11:57

I think this is the only safe and sane way to see family.

And I say that as a teacher (maternity leave).

I’m hugely jealous that my family aren’t so sensible meaning I’ve had to decide we don’t see them.

LegoPandemic · 29/11/2020 12:02

Have a festive day after Christmas so you can isolate without missing school. I have a thread on this exact dilemma Wink

ladyvimes · 29/11/2020 12:04

If we weren’t teachers we’d be doing the same. It’s a real dilemma at the moment about whether to visit the in laws or not.

Newkitchen123 · 29/11/2020 12:10

Definitely
If my parents were still here I wouldn't hesitate

KnitFastDieWarm · 29/11/2020 12:16

We’re taking DS out of school - he’s in reception - for the last week of term so we can see my lovely MIL who we’ve not seen since last christmas.

Littlefluffyclouds13 · 29/11/2020 12:16

I'm an early years teacher, my whole department is expecting very low numbers on the last week.
I totally understand why and if I could I'd do the same myself so I could safely see my loved ones!

LuckyAmy1986 · 29/11/2020 12:22

Nothing wrong with pulling your kids out to isolate to see family. As long as you aren't signing that bloody petition to get schools closed so that others have to do the same!

Your family, your choice.

RoseTintedBlue · 29/11/2020 12:25

@Redlocks30

I’m considering doing the same.

I would imagine the schools will be very very empty that last week. If that is as I predict, no new learning will be missed.

Will be business as usual at my secondary regardless of numbers. All work is already routinely provided online to cater for the ever revolving pockets of students isolating and the kids are expected to keep up.

I'm afraid teachers aren't going to pause the curriculum for people who prioritise Christmas get togethers over the last week of school, they are desperately playing catch up as it is.

SingANewSongChickenTikka · 29/11/2020 12:25

I personally wouldn’t do it, but many will. I think mine will get more out of an as normal as possible run up to Christmas.
Worth bearing in mind that while it will reduce risk it won’t eliminate it. Children are often asymptomatic so could unknowingly have it during the 14 day isolation, passing it on to you just in time for Christmas.

Whattheactual20201 · 29/11/2020 12:26

I have already pulled DC13 out of school for Xmas
DD7 hasn’t been back to school since first lockdown so didn’t need to pull her out for Xmas.

RoseTintedBlue · 29/11/2020 12:29

@SingANewSongChickenTikka there was a thread on this subject a few weeks back where at least one poster said she planned to lie about symptoms in order to get an NHS test right before visiting relatives! I'm sure the testing system will cope brilliantly if everyone has the same idea Confused

MrsMigginsMate · 29/11/2020 12:34

I'm doing this, DD will do the online work to make sure she is caught up, and I will be honest with the school about our reasons for keeping her off. I don't agree with lying to the school, I think they see through it anyway.

Blueroses99 · 29/11/2020 12:35

I’ve been thinking about doing this. I don’t think I will because DD started in September and loves school (she has put her school jumper on today even though it’s the weekend!) and I think she will struggle with 2 weeks off as it is even before we add the extra week.

twinkletoedelephant · 29/11/2020 12:40

Ds hasn't started secondary yet (yr7) and has only just been allocated a school - just waiting for transport its a specialist school.

Wild horses wouldn't stop him from going he is absolutely desperate to start big school, and he's missed so much already - he is provided an hour a day tutoring which is no where near enough for a him.

Strangedayindeed · 29/11/2020 12:40

Do it. Please do it.

raspberryjamlove · 29/11/2020 12:45

We are doing the same, our little one is at nursery so still going to be paying for it (ouch) but just not worth the risk x

MatildaTheCat · 29/11/2020 12:46

I think that’s a lot for them to miss out on when you could host on NYD and have a gorgeous festive lunch and presents with the in laws. That would mean you have two special days and something to look forward to as well as Christmas Day.

It would mean living very quietly during the holidays but there’s not going to be much to do anyway.

TheRubyRedshoes · 29/11/2020 12:50

Do it op they will have 100s more Xmassy class stuff to do and only one gp.

MrsMigginsMate · 29/11/2020 12:54

@MatildaTheCat

I think that’s a lot for them to miss out on when you could host on NYD and have a gorgeous festive lunch and presents with the in laws. That would mean you have two special days and something to look forward to as well as Christmas Day.

It would mean living very quietly during the holidays but there’s not going to be much to do anyway.

Isn't it against the rules to host on January 1st in most places? We are tier 3 and we only have a short window at Christmas in which household mixing is allowed.
BluebellsGreenbells · 29/11/2020 12:55

They are young and will cope

Get organized with activities, set up a time table so they do some school work each day, join twinkle and buy printer ink.

Get so crafts and save ‘junk’ bottle tips, cardboard, etc and a load of glue and paint.

Christmas films if they can sit still.

It’ll be worth it.

MrsMigginsMate · 29/11/2020 12:56

To clarify Matilda I think you have a good point and it would be ideal to do it that way, but the government seems to have other ideas. I understand they don't want new years revelry but by limiting household mixing to a few days over Christmas they are sort of forcing our hand in terms of our isolation window.

MrsMigginsMate · 29/11/2020 12:59

Does anyone have activity ideas to add to this thread to get us through the isolation?

For my 18 month old I thought of putting toys inside set jelly so he can eat his way into them and have some sensory play. We will also do a big tray of dried rice and lentils for him to play with his diggers in. My eldest is 8 and she is a bit more difficult to drag away from the TV so any ideas are welcome.