I’ve caught my husband out on a little lie and I don’t know how to feel about it. He’s lied before. Mainly when he’s feeling awkward or in a difficult position and nothing has been life changing about it so I’ve always just let it go for the sake of peace and our very long marriage. This one has really hurt me though. We’ve been married a long time with small kids. It was his birthday a few weeks ago and on his birthday I popped out to the shop to pick him up the dinner he wanted and some goodies. While I was out, he popped out to see a friend who gave him a bit of weed for his birthday. Now I don’t necessarily mind the smoking. Each to their own but when I asked him later that day if he’d had a nice day he didn’t even mention being out or seeing this guy. The next day he made a big deal of not having been outside for days. A few days later he let slip he’d seen this guy. I was a bit surprised considering he said he hadn’t been out of the house for days and hadn’t mentioned it all. He spoken in great detail about the people who had called or sent cards but nothing about this guy. I asked him why he hadn’t told me and he erupted into a barrage of accusations. He didn’t tell me because I would have shouted at him. I made him feel awkward then it just got to uncomfortable to tell me. He became very defensive and hostile. Because I then said I think you’re being very unfair here. I haven’t shouted and wouldn’t. He then stomped off. His back was up because he “never gets to do what he wants to do” he’s made reference to this several times lately. For reference, we live where we do because it’s where his family are (not mine). We live hundreds of miles away from my choice of area. He gave up his job to WTH and works 2 out of 5 days a week which he does. He goes out drinking not often but encouraged by me. I’m not that kind of person. On the other hand I’ve got 3 friends he has banned me from seeing over the years. I do have an issue with this particular friend. I introduced them by the way but the first time he came over my DH took him upstairs in our house where I had all of my underwear and the room what a shit heap. I expressed my boundary that I don’t think it’s appropriate. He also started having this guy come over to the house and not even tell me he’d be coming. I think it’s basic respect to say to the other person who owns the house that somebody will be visiting. So I’ve had niggles with the way he’s gone about this. I’d never stop him seeing him as he seems to suggest but he’s felt within his rights to make opinions and say when he doesn’t want friends of mine he doesn’t like not to come to the house but the one time I do it, it’s a problem? I think overall it’s the fact he’s taken to lying to see this guy that makes me feel uncomfortable and I wanted other people’s opinions on it. FWIW if I invited one of my friends over he hates for dinner without telling him, he’d give me the silent treatment and probably end the marriage