To fucking hate myself at the moment

[BloodyGross]

Because I'm pregnant and feel so fucking ugly and fat.

I could literally cry when I see myself.

Sorry op. I've worked really fucking hard to lose weight to get pregnant and now I can't. I am jealous as all the pps have suggested. I'm sorry. I hope you feel better soon

@WhoUsedMyName or cough or sneeze, although that's a bad idea in public at the moment anyway.

Sorry op me @Iminaglasscaseofemotion just contaminated your thread with our bodily fluids. We feel your pain plus more 😂

@Titsinknicks I didn’t think your first post was unkind, just making the point that it’s all a matter of perspective. So glad you came back on to explain properly - huge kudos to you for putting in all that effort (& bloody well done! It’s not easy) and fingers crossed for you

Op, I totally get you, I gained 4 stone each pregnancy and felt like total crap for most of them. This too shall pass. Be kind to yourself: you’re cooking a whole new human being, and that’s a big lift. to you too.

You just have to keep reminding yourself that your job is not to look good right now! It is to create a nice home for your baby to grow. Sadly we don't all look like the women in the movies do when they're pregnant. I say this at 20 weeks pregnant and still waiting for the glow

@Titsinknicks That absolutely fucking sucks and I would be feeling the same. You're a better person than me though, as I'd probably never apologise for making a comment like that! Wishing you luck x

bloodygross I bet you look gorgeous . I heard a lovely talk the other day via DDS school and it was to help negative thinking as you can literally re-set it : every time you think about it, try to instead divert your thoughts to something about you you feeL positive about and within 21 days the pattern changes apparently . I hope you can try it as self esteem so healthy and especially with a new person to guide soon hopefully , I do hope your pregnancy goes well

@Titsinknicks I actually thought your post was a good bit of perspective.

You're a better person than me. When I was struggling to get pregnant there is no way I could have come back and apologised to someone stressing about pregnancy weight.

I think @Titsinknicks is spot on. What does OP want to hear? Some people would be dying to be pregnant and "fat"

I absolutely felt like this when I was pregnant with my first / like a hideous whale exploding out of my clothes! Gained shed loads, stretch marks etc But then I had a second and just felt so different! I felt sorry for first time pregnant me - I was so unnecessarily mean to myself!!! I really do think pregnant women are beautiful and regret not having photos of myself - I took them in my second pregnancy - you lose the weight (if you want to no pressure!!!) but I really enjoy looking at them now as that’s what it took for me to have my babies and I feel proud.
Try and be kind to yourself! You wouldn’t think these things of another person so it’s not your body - it’s in your mind!! Try and focus on all the nice things!

Just to clarify, I didn't take offense to TitsInKnicks comment, I can totally see where she's coming from (I struggled to get pregnant too, it's not because I'm ungrateful to be pregnant).

I'm 30 weeks. I have a bump that I love. It's the rest of me, I feel like my whole body has piled it on recently. I was very sick at first but since that's stopped I just feel huge everywhere, especially my face. And I've not had the glow either. In fact I feel the opposite, bad skin and my hair is very dry and frizzy.

I've also been suffering with low iron so am so tired all the time. I just feel completely out of it and so unlike myself. I posted because I saw myself in a video my husband took earlier and I just look awful. I guess it just worries me that I won't be able to lose this once pregnancy is over.

Hey! Im pregnant at the moment also!... i think its a common thing for women to feel 'not themselves' when pregnant as they have to deal with all the changes to their bodies... i was already obese before i got pregnant and already had stretch marks but i felt i could do something about it and used to go the gym and diet using slimfast to make myself feel like i was in control but now i can't as im paranoid about covid and wouldn't do slimfast pregnant obviously so ive decided to just go with it... try not to overeat, try and walk for 30 mins a day and then concentrate on getting fit when baby is here by taking them out for lots of walks and dieting.. in the meantime i try and wear flattering outfits and put makeup on as i have massive dark circles under my eyes all of a sudden too! And my teeth seem yellow !!

I think I posted something similar during my last pregnancy, I piled on the weight massively from being very slim, and when she was about 6 weeks old last Christmas I literally stood in my bedroom and cried about how awful I looked. I didn't mean I didn't love my daughter, I absolutely adore her, but I felt horrible about myself. This was my third baby too but I gained more weight and was just knackered and felt rubbish.

You are not alone, lots of people feel like you do and it's ok that you do. I obviously understand that there are others who would give their right arm to be pregnant but that's really not what this is about. It's about losing control of your body for a while and being a bit upset about that.

What I would say is that in my case, my daughter turned one last week and I have lost every pregnancy pound and am actually in great shape just now. I feel good about myself again. You can get back to where you were before so don't worry about this, it's a temporary state of affairs and if you are very lucky you get a permanent child out of it, so it's all worth it in the end.

I remember being 9 months pregnant and had to go to a wedding. I had a lovely tight black dress, showing off my bump that I was so proud of, did my make up and hair everyone said I looked so beautiful!

They were lying.

I saw the photos. I had fat rolls all over the shop a double chin and hot flushes so nice and red, not glowing. Genuinely thought I looked good as well

Hoping to make you laugh?

Also, remember with my third I was really unwell. I put on a lot of weight and was very bloated/swollen (was pre-eclampsia) and I remember looking in a mirror and I honestly could have thrown up. I looked disgusting, but DH said I looked lovely. I think he was lying but that's what you do when you love someone.

It won't last forever, you'll have a baby soon, and you'll be able to get your body back. Mine still isn't 100% back but that's my issue and my self esteem is a bit fucked anyways.

Good luck OP. No one looks like those celebrities that do those naked pregnant photo shoots.

Did you think you'd become skinny whilst pregnant, op?

@Srslydontgiveacrap

I think *@Titsinknicks* is spot on. What does OP want to hear? Some people would be dying to be pregnant and "fat"

Maybe just someone to agree or vent to instead of telling her how lucky she is. For some people pregnancy is fucking horrendous. Other peoples struggles shouldn't mean that can't be spoken about!

jesstan1 Did the op actually say that? No, she didn’t.

She feels crap, that’s allowed.

@jessstan1 obviously not but you don't expect to feel like a big fat whale when others are walking around sparkling with a football bump under there tops it feels unfair when your emotional too

@jessstan1 Don’t be a dickhead.

@malificent7 I understand what you’re saying but that’s going to make a lot of women feel like shit.

I felt like that in my first pregnancy.
Didn't help with MIL comments of "You are getting so fat!" and "We will need a JCB to lift you out of that chair!".....I wasn't overweight at all, just pregnant!

It's not too early (or late, I guess) to watch what you're eating and don't 'eat for two,' whatever you do. We're probably all bored shitless of going for walks by now but any exercise is better than none.

I was slimmer AFTER one pregnancy than I had been before but during the pregnancy after that, I piled weight on because I just thought i could eat anything.

A lot of how you're feeling will also be down to those fucking hormones.

Waste of energy hating yourself.. Hating others great use of energy

[quote WhoUsedMyName]@jessstan1 obviously not but you don't expect to feel like a big fat whale when others are walking around sparkling with a football bump under there tops it feels unfair when your emotional too [/quote]
I was like a beached whale but for some reason didn't care. I ate my way through pregnancy quite contented and cow like.

When I look back, I would have been better to have eaten less but it's a bit late to think that now.

I'm sure the op doesn't look half as bad as she thinks and she will lose it.