Would this annoy you?

[Boop79]

A bit of a random one. My own DM is very much a talker will talking to random people even people she doesn’t know. Also in her job she meets a lot of people.

If she gets talking to a stranger and she finds out they live in the same area as me (roughly 15 miles away from my mothers home). She asks if they know me or my kids of if their kids go the same school etc etc. She even tells them what street I live on and where my kids go school and if they have kids if their kids go to the same school and know mine. Giving out our names etc.

Then she rings me asking if I know these people - like I bleddy know everyone. I keep myself to myself and don’t know a huge amount of people. I don’t really give a crap (sorry not sorry 🤣)

Sounds trivial but it’s really starting to irritate me.

Aibu?

I’m finding it quite intrusive tbh! It’s one thing saying oh yeah my daughter and family live there too but giving out street name and names, school is another thing!

Aibu? Am just being a grump?

Personally I would hate that. My life is private!

Sounds like it would be very difficult for her to stop doing this. Have you asked her directly to stop doing it and why you want her to?

Wow my mum is exactly like this and it drives me crazy!

I just look at her like shes mad and say time and time again "I hardly know anyone" or "I know who they are but I dont know them and they dont know me"

I'm really private and hate the idea of nosey people thinking they "know" me

@Chamomileteaplease no not really. She’s not the easiest to talk to. I will try and mention it. Usually when she mentions it I don’t really respond hoping she will get the message.

@RedTawny so annoying isn’t it!

Also she has actually got talking to people I know (not friends with but know from the school, work for or whatever). And they have approached me saying they have met my mum. I just want my own life! She’s just very intrusive!

Usually when she mentions it I don’t really respond hoping she will get the message.

Unfortunately it sounds like your mother will need this spelling out rather more clearly.

Tell her that you really don't want her spouting your business to all and sundry. Very clearly!

However, no offence but she sounds quite strange and I don't think she will stop

I'd hate that.

My mum is similar, she was recently chatting to someone in the supermarket and found out the woman's child went to the same uni as me as a 1st year when I was 3rd year. She told the woman which halls I lived in, then phoned me asking if I knew this bloke (I left uni 14 years ago) and said the woman had given her the sons number and passed it on to me saying I should ring him to chat about our days at uni!! Wtf mum.

Quite apart from the intrusion on your privacy ask her if she has even thought about the safety aspect of this. She shouldn't be giving out such personal information about you and your children to random strangers without your permission.

I would loathe that. When I was a kid my parents used to socially engineer me to be friends with kids of people who they thought would be useful to them professionally or socially (my dad was a terrible social climber). It's left me with a lifelong hatred of using other people as pawns in your own social ambition. Even if well meant.

As others have said its also a potential safety risk.

Just tell her to talk about her own shit to random strangers and keep her fucking mouth shut regarding your life.

Does she tell everyone on the bus where she lives herself etc etc? I bet she doesn't. Stupid cow.

This would wind me right up!

My mum does this too.

But she also has a freakish memory for every single person I went to school with and all their siblings / great aunt / neighbours and always takes the long route around any tale to tell me any tiny bit of insignificant info.

Mum: “Oh hi Shirley, you know who I bumped in to? A woman you might know. Do you remember Gregory from year 2? He had a sister called Samantha and a brother called Aaron. Aaron was very naughty and once took the school hamster home? Remember? Anyway, their parents ran a pub in the town and there was a man who used to drink there called Roger. Roger had a daughter called Bev who was in the same year as Karen’s daughter Rebecca who lives next door, do you remember? Well, you’ll never guess what. Bev’s dog has died”.

Me: WTAF why do I not remember any of these people.

I would hate that tbh.

I have an uncle like this. When my df’s partner died my uncle went to the funeral 300 miles away where my df lived very privately.
By the time my uncle had left all df’s work colleagues knew df and his partner were not married, that he had left my dm and how many years he’d been with dp.
My df wasn’t best pleased.
My uncle is still the same many years later.

My DM has some faults but thank goodness this is not one of them. She is in fact the exact opposite. It's like MI5 with her. If told a secret it will never pass her lips and scammers have no chance. Perhaps you could go down the scamming route that giving out information like that is not just inappropriate but could affect your finances or worse.