I know this has been done to death already, sorry!
Basically DH and I and our baby have been really careful all year, due to pregnancy and other health conditions. We met up with parents and in laws over the summer outdoors, socially distanced, but since then cases have sky rocketed.
DH parents are both vulnerable as elderly but live together in their 70's / 80's. DH's brother is also vulnerable.
My side are a huge family made up of zillions of households (loads of adult siblings, 2 hospital workers, school aged siblings, plus divorced parents and their partners coming and going etc etc).
DH's Mum has assumed we will visit them and spend the day, along with BIL. BIL wants to wait into Feb / March once they have been vaccinated hopefully, and do a meet up then. We agree with him but DH's Mum is fuming and thinks we are all being OTT. We all live hours apart so no chance of a quick outside meet up.
My Mum has also just assumed we will go to her. Not even asked about DH's side. She is desperate to cuddle us and the baby. However her household has loads of people coming and going, and generally the family are not socially distancing. We would prefer to stay away and do it in the Spring outdoors or once vaccine is out. Again, they live hours away so no doorstep drive past possible.
3rd issue is that each mother is likely to get offended if we see the other. They are both the type to get upset over this.
DH suggested we go for a walk with 3 of my family members on the 27th, but I'm still concerned and also feel his mum will be upset she wasn't included. They can't really go for long walks due to their age.
It's all such a minefield! We are not massively close knit to our families but equally don't want to upset them. But we are also very safety conscious and risk averse. I wish I could hide under a duvet until next Easter!!
Not really an AIBU.. but.. How do we explain this to people who don't get how we feel and aren't risk conscious?