To want to cry?

[blubberball]

I can't remember the last time I cried, maybe about a year ago? That was a rare one off. I really want to, but I just can't. I have depression and have come out of an emotionally abusive marriage, and I just feel nothing now. My dm's dog died, and I didn't cry. Can I learn to cry again, or force it? I feel like it would be a good release.

Try watching a very sad movie?
If you just need a release you can try throwing pillows around, jumping on the spot or shouting when noone can hear you.

Can you watch some Donkey Sanctuary adverts or RSPCA or similar? These get me crying even though I can't cry either.

Thanks. I need to try these. I feel it bubbling below the surface all the time. Kind of scared that I'm going to snap and break down at some random, inappropriate moment.

Are you on antidepressants? They can be pretty emotionally blunting itms. If so I'm not advising coming off btw!!

Sounds like a tough time. From the more psychological side it may be that you're in survival mode and don't really feel safe to feel right now.

It sounds superficial but I'd also say sad movie. Have you seen, "The Perks of Being a Wallflower?

I haven't seen that. I should try it, thanks. I am on antidepressants and have been for years. I've managed to cut down a lot, but have never managed to come off them completely. Living in survival mode is spot on. Just struggling to get through the day every day.

Life is blumming hard.

Maybe as silly as it sounds do set aside time to watch a sad movie and maybe give yourself half an hour a day when there are no kids or work etc to deal with to say it's ok for me to feel now and sit quietly and tune into your body and how that feels and focus in on the physical sensation of your emotions.

I cry very rarely as well and I know what you mean: it is a blessed release sometimes.

Oddly enough the really awful, big things in life tend not to make me cry -- I barely cried immediately after my mum's death. Sad movies don't make me cry either.

Its mundane, frustrating stuff like having lost my keys that really unhinges me.

@blubberball

I can't remember the last time I cried, maybe about a year ago? That was a rare one off. I really want to, but I just can't. I have depression and have come out of an emotionally abusive marriage, and I just feel nothing now. My dm's dog died, and I didn't cry. Can I learn to cry again, or force it? I feel like it would be a good release.

Don’t force it, but don’t worry about it. I cry a lot, but to be honest I wouldn’t cry if someone else’s dog died either!

No someone else's dog likely wouldn't get me either. I have strange crying triggers nowadays. It's usually just when something strikes me as a really honest and true reflection of life's pain, or how it feels to have to keep on surviving and it just resonates with me deeply and unlocks a bit of stored pain or grief by bringing light to it.

You're right. Crying is important. When I am moved to tears by something like I just tried to explain it definitely feels therapeutic or healing to meet and allow that pain.

Numbness is hard but usually there to protect us I guess. Hopefully short term till we're safe to feel.

Have you got Netflix? Watch "If anything happens, I love you". The trailer made me cry (I can't watch it) and it's only 12 minutes long.

The boy in the striped pyjamas film made me cry like I've never cried before, and I'm not a crier!

I find it very hard to cry and always have done primarily because there was somebody who I was determined not to cry in front of. Films, books etc just don't do it to me like they do some people, it took some really bad news before I cried and then it didn't really help. It's not always the panacea that people think it will be OP.

When I need to cry it out, I watch 'Me Before You'. Always does the job for me!

I cry easily and often, though...

Hope you manage to find something that works, because it's true, sometimes you really do need to just let it out.

Thanks everyone.

Abused dog & cat rescues on You Tube get me every time. You're right, it's a release. It's really common to become numb after a terrible time.

I really thought my tears were broken, wen through the death of two parents without crying. Then I watched the Bruno Christmas ad on youtube. Definitely not broken now.