Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Engagement ring

13 replies

Imworthit · 24/11/2020 20:15

Is it normal to panic after getting your engagement ring? Not about the wedding or the marriage but the ring itself. I loved my ring when I picked it. Its classic, simple and shiny, little flower shape that looks like a solitaire (see pic). But suddenly I'm thinking the stones should have been bigger, band thinner, or straighter. I should have considered how it would look with a wedding ring or other jewellery. My partner would have bought a more expensive one but I didn't want him to have to pay it off in these hard times. Starting to regret I'm not more of a diva 😂. Worried people will think it looks cheap, it should have had more sparkle. Maybe just need to get used to having something on that finger or bummed I can't get my nails done right now. The Christmas jewelry stores and their crazy upselling didn't help 😂. Think I'm freaking that it's such a permanent decision? Not actually asking if I'm unreasonable, per say, of course I couldn't be more blessed. Just wondering if it's common to freak out a little?

Engagement ring
OP posts:
sobsanta · 24/11/2020 20:18

Firstly, it's not a situation that can't be rectified if you still don't like it after you've settled in. I chose my own engagement ring too and it was very much a place marker for something more permanent. I switched up both engagement and wedding rings from silver to yellow gold as I wear far more yellow gold now and upgraded to a larger stone. I still have my older ones in a box. It's not any less special and we are no less married.

But for what it's worth, the ring is lovely.

Redlocks30 · 24/11/2020 20:23

Is it not a ‘normal’ solitaire-sorry, it’s too far away to see?

Millions of people (me included!) have a solitaire-I love mine.

user17425642134531 · 24/11/2020 20:23

It's a ring. I think you need to calm down and probably stop drinking the diamond companies' koolaid.

Bookaholic73 · 24/11/2020 20:24

I absolutely HATED my first engagement ring, so it ‘accidentally’ broke a few weeks later.

stampsurprise · 24/11/2020 20:25

I think it's a beautiful ring and you have dainty hands which suit it. 😍💍

OneRingToRuleThemAll · 24/11/2020 20:28

Your ring is beautiful. You are right saying that your partner shouldn't have to pay off a ring. If it needs a payment plan he can't afford it. Save the money for the marriage instead and start married life in a secure financial position.

HermioneWeasley · 24/11/2020 20:32

It’s ridiculous to get into debt so we’ll done for keeping proportion. It’s also not forever - you can get it traded up in future years if you care about it and can afford to

M0rT · 24/11/2020 20:33

I chose my ring and also spent less then DH was willing to pay as I wanted to prioritise buying a house.
For the first week or so I kept looking at my hand thinking hmmm..but then I got used to it and by the time of the wedding I loved it.
Give it a few weeks and you'll probably be the same.
Think it's just the notion that you will wear it forever, makes it seem a bigger deal than it is.
Try to think of what the rings of people you know engaged/married are like.
Bet you can't Grin

tobedtoMNandfart · 24/11/2020 20:43

You picked it
It's lovely
DP was happy to pay for it.
Presumably you love each other and want to spend the next 70 years together (although you make no mention of this).
Sorry to break it to you but no one else will give a shiny shit one way or the other.
I think you are overthinking this.
HTH

OfTheNight · 24/11/2020 20:47

It’s ok if you don’t like it, just get a different one. I’ve got a placeholder at the mo because I’m super fussy and want something perfect. My first engagement ring from ExH was really expensive but I look back and realise it was a bit tacky. I had a wedding ring made to fit it though, so don’t worry about that side of things!

cretelover · 24/11/2020 20:48

Yes I had the same panic after getting mine, I had mine made and the diamond looked bigger before it was set into the ring! All I can say is when I got my wedding ring it made the diamond look bigger, no idea why! I like yours by the way. Congratulations

Albuswulfricbriandumbledore · 24/11/2020 20:50

Truthfully when you are 20 years a couple of kids a mortgage and you've been through loss and triumph together, that ring won't be about the diamonds or the shine. you'll look down at it and think about how you rubbed it when you felt sad and alone and it made you feel connected to the person who chose you.

Waveysnail · 24/11/2020 21:06

Havnt worn mine since dc1 as scratched him since he was a baby. Wouldnt sweat it

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread