Expectations of a ‘best friend’

[Bleughbleughbleugh12]

Just wondering if I expect too much of a ‘best friend’. Our friendship has been deteriorating for some time. I’m not sure if it’s just a case of our lives are just different now or we just aren’t going to be friends for much longer. Over the last year I’ve dealt with one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to deal with, with zero support from said friend, rarely even a text. On top of that I’m also facing one of the most exciting things to happen, again with zero input from said friend. Over the year we’ve only met up once which was my doing and looking back I’ve realised it’s a very one sided friendship. Always me hosting etc.. but then I also wonder if when I had my babies I struggled and maybe I was a crap friend then and that’s caused the distance now... either way clearly the friendship is causing more bad than good now? So what’s the norm, zero support, rarely a text? I’d like to think I’m a fairly low mainentance friend in general as I am an introvert but surely meeting up once a year is pretty low for any friendship

Cut your losses and cultivate more rewarding friendships. For me she does not sound like a best friend, or even a good friend. More like a passing friend with very little investment on either side.

Accepting that she is just a passing friend and treat her as such. The best friend label is quite teenage, personally, I would move past it to develop stronger, more meaningful connections. No need to formally announce it. Just quietly make some better friends and leave her as the odd text kind of friend.

I am assuming you are not judging her on this one year, as covid has made it very hard for most people to meet up. If she has been like this for years now is the moment to step back. Make some better friends and move on.

I agree with the previous poster and also don't like the phrase best friend. Because I genuinely have 2 very very best friends (separate from each other) and a few other very very close friends. I'm single and they are all there for me in different ways as am I. Some of them have children, some of them don't. I'd like to think I am always there for them but I guess life gets in the way sometimes.

I would move on and develop some strong connections with others.