Chronically sentimental-Is this normal?

[Igglepiggle78]

Not sure if sentimental is the correct term. I’ve always been a fairly sentimental person and have vivid memories of my childhood and teenage years. The years since then have been generally happy and aside from obviously this horrendous year, I’m fairly happy.
But I can’t stop thinking about my past, it started more and more when I hit my mid 30’s (42 now) I love to think about my teenage years (my favourite years) and the person I was then and the excitement and experiences I had. Life isn’t completely boring now, I live abroad and have travelled lots and had a good career etc, but it’s massively dull compared to the past and fairly relentless with a toddler day in, day out, as m much as I adore her.
When I hear music from my childhood/teens/twenties it affects me so strongly, I even feel it for 4/5 years ago. How can I stop doing this, does anyone else to this extent? If I could be younger again with my family at home or go back to that teenage girl out clubbing every night, I’d do it in a flash, do it all again.

Yes I'm exactly the same. But i have no idea how normal it is. I find I beat myself up about it, and feel as though i dont fully appreciate the life I have now because I yearn for the past.

Im in my 30s and have a family, but the last 2 years have been very hard for various reasons and its made me even more like it!

@Anon99925th It’s strange, isn’t it?
I try to live in the moment as I know I’ll look back on these days and want them back too. But when younger, I didn’t even think like this, I just ‘Lived’
Depending on what mood I’m in, it can make me desperately sad, for example I’m watching Totp from 1990 now, when I was around 12 and I vividly that girl then, it’s sad I won’t have that again (obviously!)
The passing of time is strange

*Remember

You're not alone! and i'd say it's pretty normal..
I'm music mad, always have been, and at 57, my music memories go back to the '60s, i can be kitchen dancing one minute and weeping the next, depending on what track is being played.
To me certain tracks are akin to a photo album, although you don't see images they still take your mind back to where you were at the time!

@Jellykat Completely, music is so powerful 💓

I'm a hugely nostalgic person, I'm 33. It can be extremely overwhelming, I remember crying as a child/teenager when a sleepover/birthday/Xmas etc was over as I found it so difficult to accept it was over. Now I relish memories, but I spend a lot of time reminiscing. I'm a bugger for day dreaming about the future or missing the past, I really, REALLY wish I could live in the moment.

I've been watching a lot of noughties stuff this year, Bridget Jones etc, brings back a lot of good memories given the uncertainty of this year.

@notheragain41 NOSTALGIC...that’s the word! 🙈couldn’t bring to mind what I wanted to say earlier. I’m exactly the same, I notice that I seem to be more than others I know, so I wondered if it was healthy really.
When things aren’t going so well, the hankering to return to those times is even stronger. You can’t go back can you 🤷🏻‍♀️

Happy to help ha. Do you ever get really sentimental about buildings? I really wish I had a time machine and could just walk through my old houses, look through the window and watch if that makes sense?! I always make sure I take lots of photos of our home etc. I love looking at old photos of cities/towns I've lived in and watching "period" programmes set in 80s/90s/00s etc! Loving the noughties programme on bbc2 at the moment.

@notheragain41 Yes! I found it really really hard when my parents sold my childhood home, I’d been there from around 4 until I formally moved out at 23 (was away from 18 really) I was living abroad, so really it shouldn’t be of much concern to me anymore, but I almost went into a depression about it 😳so many years, so many memories..I’ve not been back since to even see it as it’s most likely changed and would be upsetting.
It mainly comes through in music/television/films for me though, especially songs from my youth and even songs with nostalgic vibes really appeal to me, lots of The Killers and Elbow songs do this for me (I’m North west originally so am a sucker for Guy Garveys poetic lyrics about childhood etc)

Yes notheragain I have a serious attachment to Battersea Power Station, it was my bedroom view up until 13 yrs.. and Londons docklands in the 60s/70s for various reasons.. But i can never go back there, its all changed beyond recognition and i want to keep them as they were in my mind.

Yes my parents sold my childhood home when I was 16, to this day it's the home I'm usually in when dreaming!

I'm really nostalgic about London too, we lived there early on in our marriage, had our second child and started my career there, if I have to go back to London for work I get such sad pangs on the tube!

TV is probably more of a trigger than music actually, I'm a complete tv addict and it has always been such a comfort to me, I have programmes/films I will watch when feeling a certain way or in certain seasons. Probably sound crazy!

I'm just like this to the extent that I actively avoid old songs and TV programmes that bring on nostalgia. Have been trying to do meditation to get me into the present instead of constantly pining for the past or worrying about the future, and have been trying to practice acceptance (sounds totally hippie which is the opposite of what I am but I knew not being able to let go/accept things was the root cause of all my unhappiness so read up on acceptance) and both those things are really helping.

@mswales how do you practice acceptance? I need a dose of that for various reasons. I try to keep a gratitude diary to help keep me grateful for what I have now.

This really resonates with me

I love reminiscing about teenage and student days. I'm happy enough with life now (in my mid 40s) but it doesn't compare to being young.

My parents still live in the house I grew up in so I am quite lucky in that respect

It’s madness isn’t it as I’m sure ten years from now we’ll look back and want to be back at this point in our lives (covid crap aside)
I mean my girl will be a young teen and I know for a fact I’ll pine for these lovely days now..it never ends! 🤷🏻‍♀️
I have it for tv shows occasionally, I had a real phase for watching Wonder years (which I’d cry at) it so reminds me of sunny Sunday evenings with the whole family sat around the tv..or Fresh Prince in my young teenage years.

God me too. But I try to think along the lines of it’s a wat of relishing the happy times.. acknowledging the love and being grateful for it

I’m exactly the same. So intensely nostalgic about my teeenage years and experiences. I always assumed it was because I lost my mum when I was twenty, so my life has been sharply divided, but good to hear other people have it too.

I live about 10 miles from where I grew up, and given that I grew up in London, the changes have been intense. My school has been knocked down, so has the leisure centre, and the ‘town centre’ (central Lewisham if you’re interested) has been completely remodelled. I feel a kind of psychic pain when I go back. It’s gone forever along with my past...

I find it unusual how I’m so like this but my dp isn’t really, for example. We’re the same age so I often reminisce about tv shows we grew up watching or songs, he joins in with it for a moment, but it clearly doesn’t affect him the same, he also doesn’t remember a lot, whereas my memory from certain years is so clear.

I’m very nostalgic. I miss the past terribly. Especially my late teens/early 20s when it was all about girls holidays and the start of my relationship with dh.

I’m also the same thinking about when my dd was born/a baby. She’s only 2 now for goodness sake!

I'm a bugger for day dreaming about the future or missing the past, I really, REALLY wish I could live in the moment.

This is exactly something that annoys me about myself. I miss so much because I’m living in the past or thinking of the future.

@JeremyIronsBenFolds I thought it could be having lived away for so long, I have a huge yearning to return to my home town (my parents moved to the South, so I’ve not been back for 5 years, but also I want to keep those memories in my mind, I hate changes!

I’m reading all these with interest - I’m exactly the same

@Greenhairbrush Yes, it’s intensified more with the birth of my daughter (now 2.4 years old) I too feel sad when I think of her as a baby..need to get a grip really! It’s a strange thing to always be yearning for the past.

I'm the same, 47 now, and think I get worse as the years go by.

@Igglepiggle78 I have just started a similar thread and completely understand how you feel! Not sure how to make it go away though...

Yes about being nostalgic. I recently had to spend a lot of time in my old University city due to DS's sport.

I had hours to kill waiting for him and I thought it would be fun but I felt like a ghost wandering around my old playground. Things had changed but even though there was a lot I still recognised it was if I had never lived there at all.