To ask for a ballpark return date??

[yolopolo]

Neighbours are flying to New Zealand in a few days and have asked me will I keep on eye on the house, check it once a week as such. They have given me a key. I don't normally mind, however normally when they go away they have a return date. Right now...they don't know when they will be back. It will be at least 4 weeks-6 weeks. I feel like I would like a date as such as I just gave a lot on and I like to work towards a date. We have no other neighbours close by so I am really their only option. Maybe I'm overthinking this??

Anyone 😭

You could just say no?

Absolutely fine to ask. And to ask to be kept informed of any changes.

@borageforager ah I would feel bad saying no. @Wallywobbles that sounds good.

Realistically how long is it going to take you to nip in once a week and lift the mail and just keep a general eye on the place. I think YABU to think this is too much of an ask.

I appreciate it’s a wide window but they have given you a ballpark return date of 4-6 weeks and clearly can’t narrow it down any more than that as they don’t yet know themselves. That said, you could ask that they keep you informed of any changes and let you know as soon as they narrow down the window. And of course if you don’t want to agree to do it because it’s for an indeterminate amount of time, or for any other reason, then you are perfectly entitled to say no.

I'd message them after 3.5 weeks asking for an update

I think it’s fine to ask for a date, and ask for updates.

Re saying no, if your houses are attached, it’s really in your best interest to have the keys and check in occasionally.. for example if there was a leak and the damage spread to your house.

However, you perhaps need to be clear that you are very busy, so you will go as often as you can but it might not be once a week on the dot. You don’t want them trying to blame you if something does go wrong and you haven’t noticed.

@JemimaTiggywinkle our houses are not attached. There's a huge field between us so I would walk over. Would probably take me 7-8 mins as I have a long drive too.

Just with out what you're happy to do but if you're going to say that you can do 6 weeks and not 8 for example, your probably want to back it up with a reason - "we can cover til Christmas but then we're away for a bit and I'm starting a new job" for example or just say no from the outset though from what you've said that sounds a bit churlish.

If the tables were turned would you want them to help you? If they're good or at least half-decent neighbours and it's not a huge time commitment then personally I'd do it. If they're awful then I'd say no outright.

I don’t think it’s a huge task and they have already given you a ballpark, they can’t narrow down if they don’t know the date themselves. You could ask them to keep you updated though

Its what 10 mins out of your week, I really dont know why it's such an issue......

You already have a ballpark return date. It's in 4-6 weeks and I'm sure they'll let you know when they're on their way back.

Even if they call you from the airport, you'll have 24+ hours notice.

Its only a few minutes once a week. Plus, it must be a serious reason that they're going - terminally ill relative? Because otherwise they wouldn't be going but if that's it, obviously they won't know how long they need to be there.

You already have a ballpark return date I'm not sure what else you want from them. Would you prefer a fictitious return date?
If they are good neighbours and would return the favour then do it but if it's every 10 days sometimes don't beat yourself up about it.
Our neighbours go away sometimes and we feed the cats and in normal times in summer they might say they will stay a few more days, are we able to keep feeding or do we have plans. No big deal.

It will be AT LEAST 4-6 weeks but probably more...

But that is their ballpark date. I don’t know what you want them to say, make up a date? “They don’t know, will be at least 4-6 weeks” is a ballpark date. That is all they know.

Well they dont know so how can they?

It's not like you're feeding the cats twice a day.

It’s no effort at all to pop over once a week, check the mail, put the bin out, turns some lights on and off.

Don’t you think they’d do the same for you?

Alternatively just say no it’s too much responsibility and suggest they fund a housesitter for several weeks.