What’s the point in getting dressed

[Bottomsupfizz]

I’m so fed up. I had a baby at the start of the year and we’ve spent the majority of our time stuck in.

When lockdown 1 eased we still weren’t able to mix households as we are in a high case area.

We’ve met people for walks and outdoor coffees.

In September baby classes opened and we signed up to a class, which was great but we only went for 4 weeks before the 2nd lockdown started and the classes of gone to online.

My husband is out at work all day and I don’t really know that many people with children that I could meet up with for a walk.

I feel so trapped in the house and it’s gotten to the point where I don’t even get dressed anymore now.

I always dress DS and we do loads of activities together but I just feel so down and feel like this is our life now.

When is it ever going to change!

My son has never played with another child his age.

How is everyone else coping?

I just can’t seem to pick myself out of this at the minute.

Do you drive? We've explored all of the parks/woods etc in our area.

Appropriate clothing means you should be able to do this still.

We'll sit and have snacks out and about and get home for lunch/nap.

My mum friends are quite far away but we get out for some type of adventure every morning (not always driving). Are there fields with cows etc in near you? A river with ducks? If you're city based are there parks further out you can walk to?

Listen to podcasts whilst walking/chatting to baby.

Its lonely and an odd year for sure but you can leave the house and get dressed if you put your mind to it and break the cycle you are in now.

I meant my mum friends are far so I only see them once every 10 weeks at most at the moment.

Getting dressed is as much for mental health as anything else. It serves to get you moving, makes leaving the house socially possible and delineates between sleep and awake times.

Do you go out at all? Even just to the supermarket once or twice a week?

@Wale90

Do you drive? We've explored all of the parks/woods etc in our area.

Appropriate clothing means you should be able to do this still.

We'll sit and have snacks out and about and get home for lunch/nap.

My mum friends are quite far away but we get out for some type of adventure every morning (not always driving). Are there fields with cows etc in near you? A river with ducks? If you're city based are there parks further out you can walk to?

Listen to podcasts whilst walking/chatting to baby.

Its lonely and an odd year for sure but you can leave the house and get dressed if you put your mind to it and break the cycle you are in now.

Yes I do drive.

Are there any swings near you? Mine loved a little go in an outdoor toddler swing.

I feel exactly as you do and have given up with making an effort too. When I do bother I feel it’s just a waste of make up.

Hope you feel better

@PicsInRed

Getting dressed is as much for mental health as anything else. It serves to get you moving, makes leaving the house socially possible and delineates between sleep and awake times.

Do you go out at all? Even just to the supermarket once or twice a week?

@PicsInRed

I take my son for a walk a 2/3 times a week, just local.

All my shopping is delivered so I don’t go anywhere.

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz

Are there any swings near you? Mine loved a little go in an outdoor toddler swing.

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz

There are, but I’ve been a bit paranoid taking him on a swing because of Covid.

@Thestateofplay

I feel exactly as you do and have given up with making an effort too. When I do bother I feel it’s just a waste of make up.

Hope you feel better

@Thestateofplay

I think my baby is probably a similar age to yours. It has been a very strange maternity leave and I can definitely relate to how you are feeling but I feel so much better on the days we go out even if it’s just to the park in lots of layers. I was a bit paranoid about swings too but have decided that - for me - the risk is low enough to ignore in favour of her having some normality and fun. I use hand sanitizer for me and a baby wipe on her hands before and after we use the equipment. I’d really recommend it if you can get comfortable with it.

Same.

Except husband is wfh in the kitchen so I can’t even make a brew/our lunch without horrendously getting in his way.

If you're worried about swings, buy a big pack of those antibacterial wipes and take them with you and give the parts that your baby would be touching a quick wipe over. Covid will be around for a while still, you can't keep a young baby/toddler away from the park until it has completely disappeared. Parks are one of the few things we can still do, make the most of them!

I'm not in exactly the same situation but I know what you mean about getting dressed. It's for your mental health. On days where I have no meetings (WFH), if I don't bother to get dressed properly it makes me feel really down and demotivated and I don't get much done. Whereas if I force myself to put some makeup on and get dressed before 9am I feel my day goes so much better and I feel a lot more positively.

Try to get out for a walk every day if you can. Baby will like it and it's good for your MH, and it will also give you a reason to get dressed. Aim for a certain number of steps each day if it will help give you some motivation.

@PicsInRed better put than I could have done.

I dont own any lounge wear, pjs or a dressing gown. This is so i get up and dressed straightaway everyday.

If i wear pjs or lounge wear i feel sloppy and de motivated and its a slippery slope to depression.

You need to get up, showered, dressed, cup of tea, baby fed and out the door in the morning.

Meet friends for walks; etc

Don’t worry about covid I’m swings, mines licked the swing about 400 times in last 8 months and hasn’t been ill once, some germs are good for them long term.

Stop food deliveries, go and do it yourself.

Go to local garden centre.

Can your OH take annual leave?

Definitely go to parks and playgrounds. Take antibacterial spray and wipes and hand gel if it makes you feel better. Bring a coffee, point out the birds and ducks, push your baby on a swing. You might even get to have a nice socially distanced chat with other people in the same boat. it is difficult I know.

Could you join one of those meet up with mums type apps and find some local parents to walk with?

My son has never played with another child his age.

He’s not 1 yet, at that age they don’t play with, at best they play alongside - he’ll be fine. But, getting dressed and out even for 10 minutes is good for your mental health and his.

I take my son for a walk a 2/3 times a week, just local.

All my shopping is delivered so I don’t go anywhere.

Do you want to stay local, or would you prefer to drive for a different walk? That's both permitted and safe.

Do you want to stay home or would it be helpful to go to the shop every so often? Also permitted and safe.

There comes a tipping point in mental health where you are safer getting out than staying home.

I feel the same op, although my children are 6 and 3. DD's class bubble burst and tomorrow is her (and my!) first day out of quarantine. I cannot wait for some normality back! Shower and dressed first thing, instead of feeling like a slob all day.
It's been a bloody hard year for us all and I can't imagine what it's been like for people like yourself who have had a baby!
If you're in Birmingham I'd be happy to meet for a walk!