AIBU to not really know what my vagina normally looks like (waaaay TMI)

[NameChChChChChanges]

Apogies in advance for the TMI nature of this post. Naturally, I've name changed because I'm a bit mortified.

After having a nice relaxing bath tonight, for no reason whatsoever other than the fact I'd just bought a new magnifying mirror (with the aim of making it easier to do my eyebrows!!) I decided to have a little look at my vag. It's literally been years since I bothered looking down there, am well past the point of making any effort to make that area look presentable.

Anyway, got the shock of my life to see (sorry, this is the TMI bit) no hole but instead a big fleshy lump sticking out where the hole should be. What the actual fuck?? Also have a couple of other fleshy lumps around the inner lips.

Am quite frankly mortified by my lumpy bits and after frantically googling will be making a GP appointment tomorrow.

Am also a bit mortified that I have no idea how long my bits have been like this, or even what they are supposed to look like any more. Was thinking that I pay attention to how my boobs feel and check for lumps etc but it has never occurred to me to do the same down there.

So it got me thinking whether I am strange for my lack of vagina/vulva checking?? Nothing feels any different down there, so I haven't given it any attention really. Does everyone else check down there on a regular basis?

Errr... prolapse?

I don't, I never have. When I had dc1 the midwife told me to look. Given I'd just given birth I declined.

I can honestly say, I’ve never ever looked down there.

Is it sore?

@grassisjeweled nope, not at all. Honestly, if it wasn't for the fact my new mirror was just there I wouldn't have looked down there at all. Nothing else that would make me think there's a problem!

Well, I'm no expert on what other vulvas look like but for me (at 48yo) any lumps wouldn't be normal and would be cause for concern. I'm glad you're getting them checked out.

In answer to your other question, yes I do still 'groom' the area so know what I look like. The only time I refused to look was post partum x2 when I knew it would be horrifying!

I have never felt any interest in looking at my vulva. It seems to get along quote merrily without my scrutiny.

Has the apparent aberration that you have found interfered with your sex life or inserting a tampon or caused you any symptoms?

Do not forget you were using a magnifying mirror which is likely to have distorted things a lot. It acts like a wide-angle lens.

I recently had to learn how to self catheterize and the nurse made me look down there with a mirror to practice! The horror, the total shock and horror and then trying to hide that horror in front of the nurse! It didn't work. She then told me she'd seen far worse! And I was near and tidy after having three kids. Sooo embarrassing. First and last time looking in the mirror down there 😂

God it was awful. Sort of wish I hadn't looked.

Sex life, tampons etc all fine. No bleeding between periods, no pain, nothing of any concern whatseover.

Why the hell does no one know what their vulva or vagina looks like...? Pretty sure all men know what their penis looks like! For the sake of your health I think everyone should know what their looks like incase of changes

This actually worries me that women can't look at their own genitals without being embarrassed

I had the same shock when I looked at mine for the first time in ages. Same fleshy lumps too. I thought it was a prolapse but gp said there was nothing wrong. I guess they just get uglier as we get older!

Probably a mild prolapse. Tends to happen after vaginal birth
www.google.com/search?q=1st+degree+prolapsed+mild+prolapsed+uterus+pictures&tbm=isch&client=ms-android-samsung&prmd=ivsn&hl=en-GB&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwj5pfTezIXtAhUGeRoKHWaFBIcQrNwCKAB6BQgBENYB&biw=360&bih=572#imgrc=KR1scZCHU6WHTM

I look at mine quite often, maybe once a week or so? Always have done, my mum taught me to look from when I was a tiny tot. Even if I didn't look though, I'm sure DH would notice if something looked off as he likes to be down there.

It's never occurred to me to look!

I've got that bit that sticks oit too, and when I have been sat on the toilet too long it sticks out futher so that I can pinch it. It's really weird because when I do I have no feeling in it.

I've been pregnant with it too, and had internal exams and nothing has ever been said about it.

I haven’t looked recently but like a PP have had a look now and then since I was quite young.

Relieved to see it’s not suddenly changed.

OP, surely if you still have an unaffected sex life/periods/no pain, there is still an opening (your description of “no hole” was a little worrying!) and it’s mainly a cosmetic change? But do get checked out of course. Good luck

It's not the same as a penis though, it's tucked out the way and you need to be undressed from the waist down and have a mirror. It not like just going for a wee and it's there.

I had a mild prolapse, so not to the extent that anything is protruding, and it could really be felt internally when I was symptomatic. Like a bulge sensation, like a tampon that’s slipping out. I’d be surprised if it was a prolapse and you had no idea, but only basing that on my experience.

Surely it's more equivalent to an anus than a penis (purely because of the impossibility of catching a casual glimpse of it, no other reason) and I can't say I regularly examine my anus either. It's good that you're getting checked out. I hope all is well.

It’s not unusual for women to have no awareness of their anatomy at all. Let’s be honest we rarely have a good close up look do we?

However I think it’s important to have some idea of your “normal”, in the same way we should be breast aware. Get to know your genitalia.

I’m a specialist nurse practitioner (women’s health) and have seen thousands of fannies - they’re all different but essentially the same. I’ve seen women who have no idea what’s normal - I saw one terrified woman convinced she had cancer because she’d found a lump and it was her clitoris.

Familiarise yourself with your fanny! Say hi to your hooha! Get to know your genitals!

Oh it might be a remnant of your hymen. I have it too. Also, there's a programme on channel 4s catch up channel on vaginas. It's really interesting

I remember looking at mine in a magnifying mirror a couple of weeks after giving birth, don’t recommend that! It looked ok after a couple of months. I am in my 40s, had 3 vaginal births and although I don’t have a prolapse it is definitely no longer neat and the walls are a bit fleshy . Can’t really expect it to look like a 20 year olds pre kids.

I haven't not looked because of embarrassment - it's my own body after all. I just haven't looked because it's never occurred to me and I'm too stiff

Yeah I know exactly what you mean. I’m 47 and I reckon mine looks the same as yours. It looks completely different to when I was younger, and i don’t just mean pre-kids. It changed post kids but it’s even changed from post-kids now too!

I reckon a slight prolapse. It all feels a bit, er, saggier.... I cant do star jumps anymore that’s for sure. I couldn’t even do PE with Joe during lockdown without pissing myself a bit.