To think this is a dig?

[Sellout61728]

Friend has worked in not for profit sector for last few years, we are 31. They are great at what they do but sort of fell into it after university before pursuing a career. I went straight into corp world and work for big law firm. We were recently talking about how much we admire a politician and friend said “theyre amazing... love how they went straight into (ethical area of) law rather than selling out, too”

Aibu to think this is a thinly veiled dig? We are both left wing, admittedly my job is a corporate one but we both went into whoever would employ us after uni and stayed there. Maybe I am feeling guilty but we both have paid roles (as we should) and I really resent the attitude. Also I do work long and crazy hours 🤷‍♀️ I do want to try and do some pro bono / voluntary work in addition to the day job

Just insecure!

I'd have thrown my head back and laughed loud and long at that.

It might be a dig. Or it might just have been something that came out a bit wrong or a bit of foot in mouth.

If she's generally nice and genuine and a good friend, it probably wasn't meant as a dig. If she has previous form for snide comments then maybe it was.

But you're the only person who could possibly know.

You obviously think you've 'sold out' too. Which you haven't.

I dont think it was a dig, unless she is generally a bitch.

You can admire someone for something, without thinking that people who haven't done that thing have done anything wrong.

If it's a good friendship I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she hadn't thought thought the implications of what she was saying, it was a bit of a thoughtless comment, that's all

Its perfectly possible to admire someone for something without thinking badly of people that make different choices. Unless she often implies/outright says your job is a sellout or whatever regularly then I think you're probably reading too much into it.
I work for a charity but most of my friends work for the "corporate" world, I'm proud of what I do but I don't think any less of them because they earn there living differently.

I think it’s just your insecurity shining through.

You describe your friend’s job as something that, although they are great at, “sort if fell into before pursuing a career”.

Maybe your friend doesn’t like your attitude implying you have a “career” while they just have a “job” which is a temporary thing, before they go on to having a “career” (like you).

Your friend’s remarks might be a dig, but I suggest looking at your own language. I would say that you started digging first.

The reference to "selling out" makes it a dig. Probably out of envy.

Your firm will after all be paying plenty of tax which will benefit people who have less money.

You are clearly doing rather well in the comparison stakes. How would you fit pro bono work in, unless its a firm-allocated loss leader in a law centre or similar? I honestly have no idea how you could do that. As a young solicitor, it took all my time to hold my head above water financially and to get enough sleep at night. I kind of resent the notion that we should be almost expected to do work for free! (And goodness knows, people don't hold back from contacting you at all sorts of hours if they know you and think that entitles you to free work). Do plumbers and plasterers do free work?

Sorry to digress. It just all sounds so virtue-signally that I find it hard to contemplate.

"Sold out".

Anyone who uses that term gets an eye-roll from me. Sorry, but it's so pretentious.

Totally about your insecurities

I don't think it was a dig at all. She probably got home and thought "shit" when she realised what she'd said.

I identify with her. My filter is crap.

@BiggestGhoulie not at all, if that is how it reads then very clumsy for me. My point in saying that was to imply that friend did not have a strong desire to join that sector but rather we both fell into our respective careers by chance rather than design

Also I think you have misread as I used the term career to describe their own path... not mine

I hate the term sold out too (like other PPs) so that may be colouring my view. Find it offensive and patronising

Boo, I wouldn't take it like that. Just agree. In my experience people just want to boast or feel good about what they're doing. No reflection on you x

I don't think it was a dig either

What's being Left Wing got to do with it?????

Actually you said that your friend “sort of fell into it (her job) after university before pursuing a career.” Your words.

That suggests that at some level you consider her work something that is hapenstance, “before her career”.

Your job is a recognised profession; there might not even be a generally recognised name for her role.

I can completely see why your friend might feel a little defensive and want to dig a bit back - even if you don’t ever mean to dig, I would suggest cutting your friend some slack.

I am not trying to have a go at you. I am trying to suggest how to see it from your friend’s point of view.