New job is making me sick

[CatnipEverdeen]

I feel so stressed out with my new job :( I just don't know what to do. It's a big step up and I thought I could handle it, but I can't. The work load is insane, but I feel like more experienced people could probably handle it...which then just makes me feel like a complete failure.

I'm only 3 months in, but I work until midnight most nights and almost always at the weekend... I can barely sleep because all I think about is the work I should be doing. Food isn't appealing anymore. Today I was actually sick. I just cry all the time.

It's not like my manager is horrible or a bully. She just doesn't really understand my job and throws everything at me. Other people have it so much worse I'm sure, which makes me feel like I'm massively overreacting and that I just need to pull myself together. I try every day, but I just can't seem to pull myself out of this. And I don't feel like I can go and get myself signed off when I'm only 3 months in. I just feel like such a failure :(

You are not over reacting, this is your boss' fault, she should be making sure the work you are given isn't excessive and that you are coping. I can guarantee that she is an arse who is also a bully.

You are now in the 'what's the worst that can happen zone'. This is the best place to be because you are free to tell your boss that you are having to work until midnight and at weekends because she has allowed your workload to become unsustainable. Ask her what she plans to do about it and tell her you will be working your contracted hours while she comes up with a solution.

Don't just allow yourself to be destroyed by her - get active and get angry. This is not your fault, no one could manage the workload more efficiently and you boss need to step up and become a decent person or you will get signed off sick.

You’re not a failure. But, someone could really need that job and could be a much better fit for it than you. Could you ask for more training and see if you improve and enjoy it more?

Remember you got the job on your own merits and they believe you are the best person to do it. Nobody should have a workload that sees them working until midnight every night however. Without knowing what the job is, I would say you need to meet with your manager and ask what they want you to prioritise. Break it down into small chunks, agree what can be realistically achieved in timescales and go from there. To protect your own health have a cut off point each day and get out for a walk, have a hot bath, whatever you find relaxing.

Thank you that's good advice. I really do need to meet with my manager and talk about the workload, but for some reason I just can't seem to say the words out loud. Like it's admitting I've failed somehow. I don't know if it's starting a job remotely and not having met anyone, it just makes everything feel so much harder. I'm just not usually this person and I've never been in this position before.

Thank you though you've all been helpful and have made me feel better