To think this is not normal (sex post baby number 2)

[Hope4theBestPlan4theWorst]

So I've got 2 dc, one 5 and 1 is 18months.

Was talking to my colleague yesterday (same age as me just a year younger, 3 children under 10 youngest 4)

She said "we have sex at least 3-4 times a week"

I can count on one hand the number of times we've dtd since dc2 was born

I'm totally exhausted and moreover I've found I don't actually even like it anymore - I hate my body and the thought of it revolts me. Last time I laid there praying he'd hurry up it was awful
I love my other half it's not that I've just gone off sex with no interest to re-ignite
it!

Is this normal??? Does anyone else feel like this??

I could probably count on my hands until DS was 15 months. I was a bit mindful it wasn't good for our relationship so I started to initiate it, at first not completely gagging for it. Once it became a couple of times a week my libido rose and now DS is just 2 and its back to pre pregnancy even willing to try out new positions etc. Sometimes it takes effort to get it back but as long as you still love your DH it will be worth it

I think both are within normal ranges. My eldest children slept best until they were around three and would then sneak into bed all the time, after messing around for hours at bedtime. Then my youngest has never really slept and needs to be held all the time! If I’d had my youngest first, I doubt we’d have managed anymore children! Instead I managed four in under four years.

YANBU OP

Between the years of 2013 and 2020 I could probably count on both hands and one foot how many times me and DH had sex!!

Those seven years were full of pregnancies, babies, breast feeding and toddlers which left very, very little room for sex

It took me 6 months before I could even contemplate thinking about having sex after ds was born. I had nearly died after an emcs, had been in high dependency with my liver & kidneys failing & had such bad pnd that I had been suicidal, I was on a high dose of antidepressants which damped down my feelings for everything, they weren't reduced until 4 months after giving birth & it took a year before I was off them.

I had 2 poor sleepers and breastfed for a long time.we switched to other firms of intimacy but actual penetrative sex happened rarely in the early years.

Like op I was knackered and hated my body post partum

My youngest DC is 2.5 and I’d happily never have sex again 😂.

We bedshare and still feed through the night only, but I don’t even think that’s the reason - in recent months I just haven’t even had a single sexy thought at all. I’m starting to wonder if it’s perimenopause 😬

I'm tired in the evening by the time get son to bed, I find best time is naptime on a Sunday. It does make it very scheduled once a week... But accept at the moment this is working for us.

I too hate my PP body but I'm trying to change my thinking and be proud of what it has done. 💐