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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think he’s just not a good father.

4 replies

j101112 · 04/11/2020 19:26

I have DS with my ex. DS is 10. We split when I was pregnant. A long time has passed since we split.

Things have been a bit hit and miss over the years but problems really started last summer with contact. Then covid happened. Ex used covid as an excuse not to see DS saying he wanted to protect both DS and his younger children with new partner. Although we were told children can travel between homes. My ex did not want to do that. Fair enough but bearing in mind he only lives 5 minutes away...

Lockdown eased. He seen him maybe 3 times since then. Once last week. Now lockdown is starting again he won’t see him.

I don’t see a huge risk. We take it seriously. Ex’s job is outside and minimal contact with others. But I can’t force my ex to see him.

Ex told DS that he cannot see him due to lockdown (as above only lives 5 minutes away).

DS has now discovered that children were always allowed to travel between parents. Something must have been mentioned at school, they also watch the news etc. A teacher May have said something not knowing the situation. Or maybe he overheard me. I don’t really know.

But DS is now upset that his dad had told him he just couldn’t see him but he could have all along?

Aibu to think my ex is just a s**t dad? Most parents couldn’t not see their children for weeks on end if they really cared right?

I know there’s different circumstances why a parent couldn’t see their children during lockdown. But In our case I didn’t feel it was too risky.

It’s like Covid is a perfect excuse for ex not to see him!!

OP posts:
Ffsffsffsffsffs · 04/11/2020 19:38

Yup, he's a shit dad.

Mine didn't see the kids from Summer last year until summer this year, despite knowing that both kids were struggling during lockdown, and being furloughed for months whilst I wfh'd/went into work as well as homeschooling. Utter cunt. I have nothing but contempt for him. Kids are smarter than we give them credit for,your ds knows who's got his back.

NetflixWatcher · 04/11/2020 19:43

He is a dickhead prick of a dad. Your poor boy, that is heartbreaking.

Mellonsprite · 04/11/2020 19:46

Yes he’s a shit, sadly I know one of my friends ex-DH said the same as he literally can’t be arsed to make the effort with his kids.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 04/11/2020 19:51

Hes a shit dad. You and your DS have my sympathies. My ex has also used Covid as a reason not to see our DC. They are teens so are well aware he has been allowed to see them all along.
I'd crawl over hot coals and broken glass to see my DC. Not sure how so many parents can just opt out of seeing them for months on end.

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