DH blames me for flat tyre

[MmmmWine]

DH has had to go away with work today to meet an urgent deadline before the next lockdown.

He rang tonight blaming me because his car had got a flat tyre and he was in the garage trying to change it.

I last drove the car yesterday.

He drove it over 80 miles today before this happened.

He blames me because my own car has been in the garage 4 times -yes 4 - recently for a cracked alloy (same wheel so obviously weakened) which had been welded but has since been repaired by a brand new alloy. He thinks I keep hitting potholes.

Of course there’s a back story to this but please answer.
AIBU?

I don't know what you could be reasonable or unreasonable about.

However, he must be unreasonable as either the flat tyre was nothing to do with you or he has driven 80 miles on a flat tyre.. Either way, I don't think it is you that IBU in this scenario.

Without the back story, I don't want to speculate any more.

Yes, what is your AIBU?

You are being unreasonable if you keep hitting potholes.

You are being unreasonable to have a wheel repaired 4 times, it should probably have been replaced the first or second time, look up your nearest breaker's yard.

You are being unreasonable to post such a cryptic AIBU without the likely significant backstory.

He's probably being unreasonable to blame you if his flat wasn't your fault.

The whole car industry is being unreasonable for making a spare wheel an optional extra in a lot of cases.

He is BU. He should have checked the tyres before setting off on a long journey. It takes 5 minutes to check / top up tyre pressure at a petrol station.

He’s blaming you because he thinks you’re an easy target for his anger at the situation when in actual fact he’s a bad driver for not planning.

Just tell him 'yes dear' on repeat until he realised you don't give a fuck what he actually thinks. Sounds like he's stressed and is projecting his failing on the easy target rather than realising it's his own fault .

If he's driven 80 miles on a flat tyre he's a dickhead. He would have known very soon in the journey that the tyre was flat as it would affect handling.
He could have caused an accident.

Well its impossible to know. You've damaged your car wheel 4 times, drove his, and how his is damaged. If it was the way round people would be telling you not to let him drive your car if he cant look after his own. You could well have caused a slow puncture, or he's picked up a nail or bit of glass on his journey.

@Nottherealslimshady

I haven't damaged my own 4 times.
I hit one pothole once. The alloy had then become weakened and kept cracking again hence being rewelded.
I didn't realise that re-welding was bad. The garage kept doing it so I assumed it was fine.
This was a mistake by me and when I realised I ordered a new alloy which is now on my car.

Dh thinks I have hit a pothole in his car (I didn't) and after him driving it 80 miles the low pressure warning came on. I haven't heard anything else from him since but I will be doing what @waitrosetrollydolly suggested and will just 'yes dear' him.

Well

A. He should check tyres before a long journey

B. I suspect if it was last driven yesterday then the pressure light would have came on before 80 miles into his trip

C. Hes being a dick

In our area you would have real difficulties in missing potholes & thats after they have "fixed" one road - has anybody noticed the state of our main roads? If it rains & said pot holes fill up all you see is a puddle.
Driving in our area is like a slalom avoiding the potholes on some of the main roads.

How long have you been married? It doesn’t take long to realise that if something goes wrong with anything while dh is using it then it will be the fault of anybody or anything but not him. However, if you happen to be using it you are likely to be asked what you were doing when you used it. It’s a man thing. Never mind as the years go by (60 in our case) he will come to the conclusion that you are always right and he should have realised this long ago. Then you are even. Ha ha. Just shake your head in disbelief. Driving 80 miles and nothing to do with him!Bless him.