Anyone here work with problem children in secondary school?

[Coolieloach]

Sorry I am posting here for traffic. My son (15) has behaviour problems and has caused harm to one of his teachers yesterday. He is in the IRU and was told to do something he didn’t want to do, he kicked a table in retaliation which skidded towards a teacher and knocked her over.
He didn’t mean to cause this but obviously did and I don’t know how to make it better. He is due to go in tomorrow and will of course apologise to the other teachers , the one who got hurt is not in as she is now off sick.
The HT is meeting with the other teachers to discuss tomorrow morning as they have ‘classed it as serious assault’. I’m so worried and sorry this has happened- can any advise me what the likely outcome is? Will police be involved? How can I try and make this right?

This will be based on your child's individual situation - any aggravating or mitigating factors etc. It'll depend on their past record and the school's behaviour policy and alternative provision for your son. I think it's most likely that the police won't be involved but that he'll be permanently excluded.

It's impossible to know without knowing your child's full history and the school's behaviour policy. In my school, it's unlikely that the police would be involved but it would be a permanent exclusion.

This isn’t for you to make right, OP. It’s for him to deal with the consequences, which, as others have said, are likely to be a permanent exclusion on his record. Sorry you are dealing with this.

This isn’t for you to make right, OP. It’s for him to deal with the consequences, which, as others have said, are likely to be a permanent exclusion on his record. Sorry you are dealing with this.

This isn’t for you to make right, OP. It’s for him to deal with the consequences, which, as others have said, are likely to be a permanent exclusion on his record. Sorry you are dealing with this.

he kicked a table in retaliation which skidded towards a teacher and knocked her over

I'm trying to think how a sliding table would send a fully grown adult flying, but unfortunately, the only way I can imagine it is that he actually picked it up and threw it at her. Which is completely different to his version of her accidentally getting in the way of him being a bit cross - still totally unacceptable, but the intent behind his actions coupled with a 'it was an accident/it was her fault for being in the way' is extremely worrying.

If that is the case and he's already lying to you about what happened/claiming it's an accident that he attacked a woman to the extent that she is now too injured to work, there is not any way that you can make this better and all you can do is accept whatever action they feel fit. Which may well include involving the police - and I can't imagine he will attend the school ever again - for her safety and that of the other staff.

Not nice for you but potentially career ending for her.

I would hope that the school will be 100% behind the teacher who is now either too injured or too traumatised to work (affecting her and the hundreds of children she teaches)

I hope that the school involves the police and report the fact that she was assaulted

I can imagine that if a big male student kicked a table full force it might go over and land on its back, at which point it might knock a teacher’s feet from under her? It’s a really violent action. I hope she is alright.

Op
I think you're definitely looking at a permanent exclusion.
It just wouldn't be fair on teachers to have someone like your son in their class. I wouldn't think they'd involve the police though. What does your son want to do now do you know?

He would probably face permanent exclusion over that.

The teacher herself may choose to involve the police which is her right after such an assault - whether the school themselves would go ahead and call the police is less likely.

If he had done it out of school - in a shop for example - police would almost certainly be involved.

You could start my getting him to write a whole-hearted letter of apology - not to try to get out of the consequences, but to try to show the injured teacher how sorry he genuinely is.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s a horrible position to be in as a parent. I hope it does get resolved and both the teacher and your boy get to move on.

He's likely to be permanently excluded of he has a long record of poor behaviour.

Actions have consequences. In this case, actual harm to someone else, and there may be police involvement of the teacher wishes to press charges.

He's likely to be permanently excluded of he has a long record of poor behaviour.

Actions have consequences. In this case, actual harm to someone else, and there may be olive involvement of the teacher wishes to press charges.

It's hard OP. DSS has significant behavioural issues and I can see this scenario playing out with him. He is in many ways an emotional toddler having a tantrum and kicking out in every direction when he loses control, unfortunately he is so desperate to remain in mainstream education even though he clearly doesn't belong there, because he knows enough to know that he is different but does want to be the same as the other kids.

PP are right - you can't fix this. He has to sit and face the consequences now of what he has done and that may well be the hardest part for you to deal with - but he is coming up to an age where you can't intervene on his behalf. In a couple of years there would be no question about police involvement and the consequences could well be even more severe than they will be now, but that isn't going to change unless he makes changes. If you 'fix' it for him, he will never learn those lessons and the next time it happens and he is treated as an adult - the consequences may well leave him shell shocked.

What is the cause of his behavioural issues? How severe are they? Is he in the right school?

I know how difficult it is for the parents as my see my lovely DH suffering with fear for DSS future - all I can say is that you have to let him take what is coming to him. Perhaps being excluded will mean he is put into a specialist school better equipped for a child with his challenges. And perhaps a visit from the police and the realisation that his mum can't in fact fix his mistakes will do him some good.

I think you are minimising. For the table to have been shoved/flung so hard that it injured the teacher to the extent that she is off sick suggests a considerable act of aggression. You can’t make it right. I would imagine they would want to exclude him, so the next thing really is to think about how to get him the help he needs so it doesn’t happen again somewhere else.

He would probably face permanent exclusion over that.

The teacher herself may choose to involve the police which is her right after such an assault - whether the school themselves would go ahead and call the police is less likely.

If he had done it out of school - in a shop for example - police would almost certainly be involved.

You could start my getting him to write a whole-hearted letter of apology - not to try to get out of the consequences, but to try to show the injured teacher how sorry he genuinely is.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s a horrible position to be in as a parent. I hope it does get resolved and both the teacher and your boy get to move on.

I think you are minimising. For the table to have been shoved/flung so hard that it injured the teacher to the extent that she is off sick suggests a considerable act of aggression. You can’t make it right. I would imagine they would want to exclude him, so the next thing really is to think about how to get him the help he needs so it doesn’t happen again somewhere else.

Having a big and presumably angry and threatening teenager launch a table (insert any other furniture/fixtures/fittings available in a classroom) at you is utterly terrifying voice of experience I'm not surprised the teacher is off.

I've known a colleague claim (and win) against the school after they failed to support him in a similar situation where the child received almost no sanction. Teachers have the right to feel and be safe at work.

Behaviour has consequences. The school needs to ensure they follow procedure to the letter (does your son have an ehcp or SEND needs that weren't being met, for example). Have a look at their behaviour policy which should be on their website, or an abridged version in your dcs planner maybe.

If he's in year 10 he's got some thinking to do over the next 18 months before GCSEs. If he's in Y11 he needs to be thinking fast, making promises and keeping them.

He didn’t throw or launch a table! He shoved it harshly and it knocked a teacher over, that is what I’ve been told. Maybe they were exaggerating?

He’s allowed back on a part time basis and his dad and I will do his BTec work with him at home so he can have a more blended approach. This is a good result and we are all happy with the outcome

Our school has zero tolerance towards any violence to Staff and drugs... both result in a managed transfer and if that fails a permanent exclusion

However, kids get a slap on the wrist for bringing in knives and weapons