Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mum with asthma and a new cough refuses to get a test

32 replies

softandfloofy · 02/11/2020 21:32

I phoned my 65yo Mum today, she mentioned she had a cough and our conversation went like this...

"A cough? Oh, maybe its covid? What about a test?"

"No no, it's just a chest infection I have, I usually get them this time of year"

"It could be covid, might be worth getting a test to be sure, the tests are free and really easy to do"

"But then I might have to self isolate"

"????"

"And anyway I cant get a test I'm too busy"

"Too busy? Doing what?"

"I have loads to do before lockdown on Thursday, I have a hair appointment tomorrow, all the gym classes I booked which I have to make the most of, sort out all this mess from the cancelled holidays. Anyway what really matters is how many people are dying, and all the statistics are fake anyway, they just record people as dying with covid not from covid. I'm sure I dont have it"

I was lost for words! AIBU? Can anyone shed some light on this situation? Mum has gone from being terrified and afraid in March to being completely flippant about everything??

OP posts:
ButterflyBitch · 02/11/2020 21:36

If she doesn’t want to get a test then she has to isolate for two weeks. Can you forward her the government guidance on it? You can’t force her to do either I suppose but it’s pretty bloody selfish when we are having to lock down again due to a rise in cases.

LizzieSiddal · 02/11/2020 21:43

I’m a bit surprised that she can manage all that activity with a “chest infection.”

BritWifeinUSA · 02/11/2020 21:46

I regularly get chest infections in November/December, have done all my life. If she regularly gets them, she would know what they are like. No one knows your own body better than you.

PlanDeRaccordement · 02/11/2020 21:48

I thought a Covid cough was a “new continuous cough” so if she didn’t cough during your conversation, she doesn’t have any Covid symptoms.

Porcupineinwaiting · 02/11/2020 21:57

@PlanDeRaccordement no that's not right. It's any cough that includes 3 or more bouts of coughing in a 24 hour period.

9ofpentangles · 02/11/2020 22:01

Wouldn't she need a temperature on top of that, too? My son was refused a test on account of no temperature and, sure enough, he was well within a day and the cough turned out to be an asthma flare up.

My daughter was feeling unwell last week but, again, temp normal and quick turnaround in 2 days

There are lots of coughs and colds going round as well

LagneyandCasey · 02/11/2020 22:35

She gets it every year and knows what it is. I assume she's coughing up phlegm which is usual in most asthmatic coughs and chest infections, but not usual in covid. Generally it's awful in the morning and eases off during the day for me, but could be different for others. I'll know if my asthma cough becomes something else as it will be a different pattern.

PinkDaffodil2 · 02/11/2020 22:41

Lots of people with COPD / asthma get a bad chest this time of year - caused by a variety of different respiratory viruses. This year it could well be COVID-19 and of course they won’t know for sure without a test - that’s the point of the tests! They wouldn’t usually know if it’s coronavirus or rhinovirus or RSV, given the hugely variable presentation of COVID-19 I’m sure it will be causing a lot of the ‘regular’ exacerbations this winter.

bobbiester · 02/11/2020 22:49

So she's planning to go to the hairdresser and gym? With a cough?

How will we ever get this virus under control???

PlanDeRaccordement · 02/11/2020 22:49

[quote Porcupineinwaiting]@PlanDeRaccordement no that's not right. It's any cough that includes 3 or more bouts of coughing in a 24 hour period.[/quote]
Oh, but the NHS website says
Only people with COVID-19 symptoms need to get tested –A high temperature OR new, continuous cough OR loss or change to sense of smell or taste. Use the NHS 111 online symptom checker if you’re not sure

I don’t see your symptom version anywhere? Only mine (new, continuous cough).

Alexandernevermind · 02/11/2020 22:55

Its coughing season if you are asthmatic. Tell her to keep away from everyone (which she needs to do regardless, particularly if she is asthmatic) and look out for new symptoms.

littledrummergirl · 02/11/2020 23:18

*Porcupineinwaiting

@PlanDeRaccordement no that's not right. It's any cough that includes 3 or more bouts of coughing in a 24 hour period.

Oh, but the NHS website says
Only people with COVID-19 symptoms need to get tested –A high temperature OR new, continuous cough OR loss or change to sense of smell or taste. Use the NHS 111 online symptom checker if you’re not sure

I don’t see your symptom version anywhere? Only mine (new, continuous cough)*.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/symptoms/

Porcupine is right.

OMITB · 02/11/2020 23:26

This time last year my mother, also in her 60s, got a new cough. She didn't make much of it at all. She finally went to the doctor in January this year and it turned out to be stage 4 lung cancer. She died a couple of weeks ago.

I don't mean to be alarmist, but we never thought it could happen to us, either. Please get these things checked out.

BanjoStarz · 02/11/2020 23:45

You can’t force her to get a test.

The problem with the three main symptoms is that it’s perfectly possible to have COVID without any of them - my aunt and her husband have just had positive tests, they both had what they would describe as a cold - runny nose, sneezing etc - no cough, no temp, no change in taste and all the “simple” graphics to differentiate between cold/flu/COVID say runny noses/upper respiratory infections are not COVID.

Both are positive - only picked up because Aunt had a routine pre-hospital admission COVID test and uncle then got tested as he had same symptoms as Aunt.

PlanDeRaccordement · 03/11/2020 00:36

@littledrummergirl

*Porcupineinwaiting

@PlanDeRaccordement no that's not right. It's any cough that includes 3 or more bouts of coughing in a 24 hour period.

Oh, but the NHS website says
Only people with COVID-19 symptoms need to get tested –A high temperature OR new, continuous cough OR loss or change to sense of smell or taste. Use the NHS 111 online symptom checker if you’re not sure

I don’t see your symptom version anywhere? Only mine (new, continuous cough)*.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/symptoms/

Porcupine is right.

Looks like we are both right. Me: new, continuous cough not any new cough Porcupine: that’s not right, any cough with three or more bouts in a 25hr period.

Link you posted;
a new, continuous cough – this means coughing a lot for more than an hour, or 3 or more coughing episodes in 24 hours (if you usually have a cough, it may be worse than usual)

So both right.

user1471457751 · 03/11/2020 01:08

@PlanDeRaccordement No you are not right and you clearly don't know what a continuous cough is. You stated that as long as the mum wasn't coughing during the call then she doesn't have a continuous cough. The other poster gave the definition of what counts (3 times in 24hrs). You seem to think it is a literal can't stop coughing.

GalaxyCookieCrumble · 03/11/2020 02:38

If she has had these symptoms before I think she will know what she needs to do tbh, all you can do is advise her.

MindyStClaire · 03/11/2020 07:58

I'm asthmatic and get a cough after every cold. We have a toddler in nursery who brings lots of lovely germs home. September to December last year I did nothing but cough, it was miserable.

I know I'll have plenty of covid tests this year, because I'll get several colds and each time I'll have a new cough, with three or more (it'll be more!) episodes of coughing in 24 hours. Each time I'll be fairly confident it's not covid, but obviously there's no way I can guarantee it. So I'll get a test and we'll isolate until the results are through. And then we'll rinse and repeat a few weeks later.

No fun, but clearly what is required by the guidelines.

PlanDeRaccordement · 03/11/2020 08:43

[quote user1471457751]@PlanDeRaccordement No you are not right and you clearly don't know what a continuous cough is. You stated that as long as the mum wasn't coughing during the call then she doesn't have a continuous cough. The other poster gave the definition of what counts (3 times in 24hrs). You seem to think it is a literal can't stop coughing.[/quote]
I did not say that was the definition of a continuous cough. It’s not my fault you are mistakenly inferring that.

sonjadog · 03/11/2020 09:10

In your mother's defence and as an asthmatic of many years myself, sometimes you get a cough that is there for a while and you know it is asthma-related because you have had that same cough every autumn for x number of years. You get to know the difference between coughing because of a lung infection and coughing because of asthma. They don't feel the same. Maybe that is why your mum is not worried about it?

flaviaritt · 03/11/2020 09:28

She absolutely should isolate and get a test before she infects three or four people with COVID. If I saw her coughing away at a gym class I would have to leave. She is being incredibly selfish. But you can’t make her.

Noitjustwontdo · 03/11/2020 09:33

It is coughing season for asthmatics and she knows her body well so I’m assuming she’s coughing up phlegm which is a productive cough. Covid coughs are dry and often accompanied with other symptoms such as body aches, fatigue and a temperature.

Feelingconfused2020 · 03/11/2020 09:40

@PlanDeRaccordement sometimes the right thing to do is just admit you were wrong, we can all read your posts.

Wouldn't she need a temperature on top of that, too? My son was refused a test on account of no temperature

Where was he refused a test? I can't believe we are still debating the rules for goodness sake. People are dying while we mess about trying to self diagnose our own coughs.

It's any ONE of the three main symptoms which includes a cough. The cough is defined as coughing a lot in one hour or 3 episodes in 24 hours. It doesn't say anywhere that of you normally have asthma or a cheat infection the rules don't apply, in fact those people should really be extra careful.

IHeartHounds · 03/11/2020 09:42

I have asthma and cough every day and every night always. I am worried every time I leave the house that everybody I pass thinks I have coronavirus and am just swanning about with it.

PostItJoyWeek · 03/11/2020 09:55

I was lost for words! AIBU? Can anyone shed some light on this situation? Mum has gone from being terrified and afraid in March to being completely flippant about everything??

I think I can see her logic.

She knows what her seasonal cough feels like and this feel like that so she thinks it highly unlikely that she has covid.

She thinks that people have lost their common sense in a panic. She thinks that if she asks for a test, she will still be asked to isolate for a day or two until she gets the test and the results, which she fully expects to be negative. In that time period she will have missed her opportunity to do all the bits and bobs that are about to be locked down.

She is no longer worried about catching something from others in all the crowded places today and tomorrow. She no longer believes the virus is a big enough risk to herself for her to seriously inconvenience herself avoid infection.

You don't know what she would do if she had symptoms she can't put down to "this is what I am always like in November". She may well get tested and isolate.

Her exasperated rant about death stats being fake was probably in reaction to you going on at her instead of listening to her. It seems you decided she was wrong and then went on a crusade to change her mind rather than listen to her. No wonder she got snippy.

That's my take on it anywya.