Mental health problems. Lockdown. Worried.

[plessuregirle]

Sorry, I've started so many threads already about this. I'm just panicking a little. I have a 2 year old toddler. The last lockdown really, really affected my mental health. I've started seeing someone since and my mum has my son occasionally overnight when I go to see him. Not comfortable seeing him with my son yet overnight. Those couple of nights a week away from my son save my sanity. I don't know how I'll cope for a month with no down time. I can't exactly form two support bubbles as it's not allowed, so will have to bubble with my mum. My anxiety is through the roof. I'm awaiting an OCD diagnosis. I have PTSD and fear that my ex will kill me (he's threatened to and I have a restraining order) and I only ever feel safe in those nights when I'm with new partner. I'm going to stick to the lockdown rules, but I'm really, really fearful for my mental health because it is probably the worst it's ever been. Intrusive thoughts. Unbearable counting compulsions. I'm exhausted. AIBU to feel like this lockdown might break me, and so many other people? Sorry, I know there are likely so many other threads about this. I'm just in panic mode and can't stop crying.

Deep breath. Honestly just fork two bubbles.

And in the medium term can you get some support/counselling to help you?

You don't need to bubble with your mother, bubble with your new partner, your mother can provide respite care for your child whilst you spend time away, childcare is different to bubbles - although that depends on the exact nature of the law enacted, but I believe that would be consistent with what's leaked - although obviously you'd not be able to do things with your mum.

Alternatively, and again we await the actual details of the law - I don't believe they're really been thought yet, but the prime minister said you can still "exercise" with someone from outside your house, so use your time with them exercising...

Check the law carefully, prioritise your health within the law.

Carry on doing what your doing , your mental is more important and I don’t see how that could not be allowed.

I'm in Wales (we're in lockdown currently) and I have 2 support bubbles, well sort of, My 2DC still visit their DF on set nights (I don't enter his home and he doesn't enter mine) and I see my DP as we're both living alone. We only see each other and no one else. I don't see why your DM could look after your DC on set nights and you still see your DP as long as you keep your distance from other people.

Yes, carry on. Assuming your mum is comfortable with you being in 2 bubbles. They are very small bubbles too. Think of the families in multigenerational homes where several adults are going out to work.
If for any reason you decide not to bubble up, definitely meet him outside for exercise and walks.

Fuck the rules. You already know you will struggle to cope without both partner and mum. That's good that you know this already, you're not going to be blindsided. You can prepare. You can put a routine in place to save your sanity. If some jobsworth twat decides to report you so be it, it's not the end of the world.

Not the main issue of your post and apologies if I’m overstepping but you haven’t been with your new boyfriend long and seem extremely reliant on him while still traumatised by your ex and his behaviour. I hope you can also lean on your mum for emotional support. A lot of women go from one abusive relationship into another as they’re vulnerable and won’t realise till it’s too late. People recommend the freedom programme which you could look into if you haven’t already done it.

As it’s such a new relationship I would stick with the support bubble from your mum. That is what I’m planning on doing. If you think you’re really struggling is there any way to move in with your mum temporarily so you have more support and can sleep better?

I feel for you .
My ds is really struggling right now and it’s worrying me sick .
I’ve said to him if he needs to go and see his gf then we will support him.
He feels so trapped at the moment and literally only went back into the office last week which helped so much .
If being in 2 bubbles helps you get through this then do it .

I agree with the PP it’s worrying to read that you can only feel safe with your new partner especially as you haven’t known him very long.

Hi OP,

I'm sorry you're struggling so much. I have severe OCD and know what an absolute nightmare it can be at times (and that's even without PTSD and that awful situation to cope with) I agree though that you are allowed to form a support bubble (with your boyfriend) and a childcare bubble with your Mum (as that is exempt). Do consider whether seeing your boyfriend might pose any additional risk to your Mum if she is in any way vulnerable though.