Self isolating to see grandparents

[1400spincycle]

My (lovely) MIL is elderly, frail with a lung condition, she also has dementia. We have 2 young DCs who she dotes on. We have not been to see PIL since DCs went back to school as it’s just too high risk.

We are concerned that we won’t get to see them at Xmas either. DH is very close to his mum ( and dad too)... so we took the kids out of school for a week before half term so we could self isolate for 2 weeks before planning a visit.

So I have put my life on hold and looked after 2 kids at home for 2 weeks - and now FIL turns round and says he doesn’t think we should come as the forecast is for rain...

I have struggled with these 2 weeks and kids have been bored and fractious. I am now seriously pissed off and have said to DH that they either make a firm arrangement to see us on Saturday or I sat fuck it and take the kids out tomorrow...

AIBU?

Maybe he’s uncomfortable at the prospect of you visiting, and the risk to MIL, and this is his way of discouraging you all from coming?
YANBU to want to know though.

Yes he is nervous and i guess he was expecting to have us mostly outside. But I feel that we are now a low risk - we’ve not even been to buy milk for 2 weeks.. whereas SILs families have both been to visit ( older teen kids) and FIL goes out most days for shopping etc so it’s not like they are shielding (still)...

Just hate it when you go to massive lengths for something and someone else just changes their plans...

I would be really annoyed... particularly after your follow up that they’ve been fine with other people visiting and have been going out themselves.

And if you’ve all been isolating for 2 weeks then you should be pretty safe... if it was weather dependent he should have told you that before you isolated for 2 weeks so you could decide whether it was worth doing.

Yes I would be annoyed too

So DH is trying.. ( and grovelling- I even got tea in bed this morning)

A plan has been reached- we go for lunch (previously it was afternoon tea and I would bring cake...) - and I will take a picnic lunch for 6!

This dear Mumsnetters was decided without checking with me- and without DH so much as looking in the fridge. A fridge which you might imagine is pretty bare after 2 weeks at home...

I was feeling more positive this morning and now once again I am heading towards WTAF? I don’t want to rock the boat by falling out with PIL as things are tricky for them ( MIL can no longer cook and FILs cooking is ‘eccentric’ but why can’t DH use half a brain when it comes to these things.

I hope you enjoy the picnic that DH makes.

@DollyDally😂

You can get a Morrison’s box delivered next day - I believe they do a picnicy one. Then your DH won’t have to go to the shops and can still make you all a lovely lunch!

@DollyDally

I hope you enjoy the picnic that DH makes.

Well said!

It’s such a typical Dh thing to do!

@thanks for the heads up on the Morrison boxes! Mind you I am veering towards the gin box now!

[quote 1400spincycle]@thanks for the heads up on the Morrison boxes! Mind you I am veering towards the gin box now![/quote]
My finger is always hovering over the gin box.