Student nursing as a single parent

[flowersintheshade]

I originally posted in work but decided to post here instead for traffic. Will get the other one taken down.

I am a single parent to two kids, one school aged and one preschool. I really want to retrain as a nurse with the goal of becoming a health visitor.

I do have family nearby who are able to provide some childcare but their dad can't have them much/overnight due to long work hours and unsuitable housing.

Aibu to think this is it doable? Has anyone got any experience of being a student nurse as a parent of young kids?

I became pregnant and a single parent mid course over 25 years ago. Back then you were expected to leave and take your shameful ways with you! I didn't. I had good parental support, a good childminder and sheer determination to get through the last 2 years. I did have ward placements that were helpful with my situation and the awkward/unpleasant qualified staff got bored when I turned up shift after shift and worked hard.
I found it tough and at times I felt like giving up but I'm so glad I didn't.
Speak to the university as they will have experience in supporting women like you before.
Many placements are in clinics, community settings and other areas of the NHS. You need ward placements with that 24/7 experience too but it's not 1950 and healthcare is so different now with many models of delivery.
Good luck!

From a university pov - speak to them about support, the distance they'd expect you to travel to placements and ask how many other parents/people with dependents are on course. If it's a course full of 18yos straight out of school chances are they won't be as good at offering the support you need as if it's a mixed cohort with students from a range of backgrounds in my experience.

Would you be interested in something very different?

Physio, Occupational Therapy or Speech & Language Therapy? Some do work weekends, some are on call at night, but most as far as I know are Mon-Fri with maybe 1 weekend in 4.

If nursing is what you want to do, don't be put off by the possibility of working weekends and evenings. Once you qualify you can choose somewhere with working hours that suit you (as long as you don't live in the middle of nowhere).

Examples of nursing jobs with no night shifts:
Day Surgery Units (also maybe General Theatres; at the hospital I work at they have separate day and night staff).
District Nursing.
Imaging/X-Ray (might have to do overnight on calls).
Dialysis Units (might have to do overnight on calls).
Endoscopy Units (might have to do overnight on calls).
Outpatient Clinics, like in a speciality like ear nose and throat, orthopedics, eyes etc.
Chemotherapy Units (senior nurses usually have an on call phone overnight in case patients need advice).
Radiotherapy Units.
Cardiac Catheter Lab (might have to do overnight on calls).

Jobs you probably need experience for (but you never know!):
Practice Nursing
Health visiting
Pre-Op Assessment Units
Discharge Lounge
Research Nursing
Sexual Health Clinics
Fertility Clinics
Occupational Health

Jobs that you'll need experience for:
Clinical specialist nursing roles.
Practice educator roles.
Ward manager.
Nursing lecturer.

There is so much flexibility with nursing; much more than other healthcare roles that are traditionally 9 - 5. You could also work minimal hours on a contract and top up your income with bank work while your kids are little. That way you pick and choose your shifts.

I did my midwifery training as a single parent, without family to help. It's hard bloody work and a massive juggle. I spent a lot on childcare over the 3 years.
I booked full time childcare and any time off on a weekday was study time. If I didn't have a shift on a weekend day it was a day off with my kids.
I look back and wonder how I got through it but I did. I am finding qualified life much easier.

So my advice is, go for it. But you have to really want it to get through the stress it involves. Good luck.

@Hobnobsandbroomstick

If nursing is what you want to do, don't be put off by the possibility of working weekends and evenings. Once you qualify you can choose somewhere with working hours that suit you (as long as you don't live in the middle of nowhere).

Examples of nursing jobs with no night shifts:
Day Surgery Units (also maybe General Theatres; at the hospital I work at they have separate day and night staff).
District Nursing.
Imaging/X-Ray (might have to do overnight on calls).
Dialysis Units (might have to do overnight on calls).
Endoscopy Units (might have to do overnight on calls).
Outpatient Clinics, like in a speciality like ear nose and throat, orthopedics, eyes etc.
Chemotherapy Units (senior nurses usually have an on call phone overnight in case patients need advice).
Radiotherapy Units.
Cardiac Catheter Lab (might have to do overnight on calls).

Jobs you probably need experience for (but you never know!):
Practice Nursing
Health visiting
Pre-Op Assessment Units
Discharge Lounge
Research Nursing
Sexual Health Clinics
Fertility Clinics
Occupational Health

Jobs that you'll need experience for:
Clinical specialist nursing roles.
Practice educator roles.
Ward manager.
Nursing lecturer.

There is so much flexibility with nursing; much more than other healthcare roles that are traditionally 9 - 5. You could also work minimal hours on a contract and top up your income with bank work while your kids are little. That way you pick and choose your shifts.

You don't just need experience to be a health visitor, you need a masters!

I don’t do nights or weekends as a nurse specialist and I work part time, but I have done my share of years of nights and weekends. Also remember that weekends and nights bump up your pay, so although I get to see my DC I don’t get the unsocial hours pay. There are advantages to doing long days in that you get your hours out the way in one chunk. Having days off during the week is lovely.

You may also find that actually you love a different area of nursing, so don’t be too fixed on health visiting too soon.

I’m a student nurse, with a preschool child, and a husband. It’s been tricky at times and like now where childcare is spotty and I’ve got two assignments and a placement on the go, it is intense. But it can be done and I know it will be worth it in the end! You definitely need childcare in place and contingency childcare, and be willing to devote time to doing your work once they’re in bed, there are assignments and reading to do. But, it is do able, I know a few single mums on my course. You will be able to give your kids a better life with a better job, that’s how I see it.

Midwifery isn't 'more money' nonsense
You'd still qualify on a band 5

I did my nurse training when I had a 10m old, an 8 yr old and a shit DH

I'm going against the grain here to say that my mentors were very good, apart from my 3rd year I rarely worked full 12 hour shifts and wasn't forced to do nights

I had a great childminder and the kids godfather would take them out if I had an assignment due

The nursing degree was easier than working full time

I'm now a mentor and practice teacher and take my students personal circumstances into account

Do it, it's not impossible xx

Also, I don’t know about al unis but I know mine says you only have to experience 24 hour care, as in if you do a couple of night shifts that’s enough to tick the box. I did 2 in my first placement and I don’t intend to do anymore if I can help it, unless there’s a good reason, I won’t be applying for jobs that involve night work when I qualify.

The working with your mentor thing has changed - they’re called practice assessors and practice supervisors now and you don’t have to do all the same shifts as them, makes it a bit easier. Worth speaking to the Uni’s about.

@Somewherein2021 no I think I really want to be a health visitor. I really want to work with babies if I can.

All these posts have been v helpful and informative thanks everyone!

HV isn’t just babies, it’s all children up to the age of 5. It’s a lot of safeguarding. Have you looked into what HV actually is? I’m not trying to be offensive, just so many students come in saying ‘I just want to work with children’ without actually thinking beyond that.

I work in nurse education. Part time route at our local uni is 25 hours placement per week when on placement block. The course is 3.5years. You still do the same theory as full time students you just do an extra placement at the end to make up the hours.

If you have good, secure childcare you’ll be ok. Those without really struggle and it really
impacts on their performance.

As others have said it’s a full on course. No 12 week summer holidays. If finance may be an issue as well look at the RNDA route instead. This can also be done part time.

Good luck.

@ZombieAttack yes I know it's kids up to 5 and am aware it involves safeguarding. I have a friend who is a health visitor who has spoken to me a lot about that aspect of the job. my comment probably sounded a bit naive, was just rushing an explanation of why I don't want to be an occupational therapist. x

I've just qualified as an ODP and trained as a single parent to two DC (aged 7 and 5 when I started). I had good support from my family but I think it would have been manageable without it too.
I think we had more flexibility with shifts than the nurses have. We also didn't move hospitals to train, we stayed in the same trust for 3 years (although we moved between the trusts hospitals and between surgical specialities).

HV is up to 19 now, not 5.

It's also changed to a masters now. So post grad degree. You get paid full time wage though when you do it, at a band 5 pay.

If you want to work with babies (that's my love too) then go for child nursing and become a neonatal nurse.
Adult nurses can also do this, but it would seem daft to look after dementia patients for 3 years when infants are you calling.

@CovidStoleTheRainbow

So can you apply directly to unis for health visiting now, or do you need to find an employer who will sponsor you first? Just curious how it works now.

I agree with the others.
My DD is a student nurse- it is tough.
50% of the course is placement, and she does a lot of night shifts, including weekend work.
Shifts are 12 hours long, so only has time to sleep, eat, do laundry before she is back on another shift. No long summer of winter holidays as other students get- only a two week break during summer.
She finds it hard and she has no children.
In your position I would consider another course.

@CovidStoleTheRainbow I did consider neonatal nursing. My first was very prem so it's close to my heart. I am definitely going to do child nursing. I don't have to decide about health visiting for 3 years anyway so plenty of time, I didn't know it was up to 19 now.

flowersintheshade

Be prepared for a tough application- particularly for child nursing.
My DDs Uni has 70 places a year for child nursing- and usually has around 900 qualified applicants.

You don’t have to decide what you want to do long term at all. Get through the course, get some clinical experience and see how you feel.

Why though?

It's well known the pay is shit, the hours are long and the support is nil.

People have to stop taking these shite jobs or conditions will never improve.

Look for roles that pay well. We go to work for money, so seek good money, not wholesome warm feelings. Our sales team at work are still doing well even during Covid, with a base salary plus commission. Call centre work - I did it for years - is fairly easy money, and they're not all "awful". Two of mine, for smaller banks, were lovely places to work, with no stress at all and encouragement to progress and get pay rises. Management isn't thrilling, but it's an easy good wage. I career-switched into tech - they're very welcoming and keen to train enthusiastic newcomers. £28k starting salary.

Chase money, not a job you'll just end up hating because you'll still have no money, and be exhausted, and stressed, and you get paid in claps and platitutdes.

Op I went into paediatric nursing thinking I wanted to be a health visitor too, however 15 years later I’m still on the ward and here a Hv is band 7, with masters qualification and I feel you’d need some ward/post degree experience before you apply. School nursing has also changed, I am more interested in that these days but waiting till my children are older and I don’t need childcare.

Paediatric nursing isn’t all babies it’s children, teens and complex needs, and can be very demanding and hard work with very anxious and sometimes aggressive parents. However it’s so rewarding and honestly love my job and the families we care for, usually those who are difficult are worried and stressed and we take that into consideration but there are some parents who are downright awful but you’ll get that with every aspect of nursing and you’ll work with nurses who aren’t overly nice or keen on students.

I have to say my ward is very accommodating to students & our charge nurses are wonderful and would help out with shifts and the new mentor programme does make things more flexible so you’re not tied down to working with one or two people for the majority of your placement. If you can secure some good childcare then you’re sorted I’m also a single parent, however I was not single when I trained and I now work part time & don’t need any childcare but I’m not sure what I would do if i did as I leave at 6am for 7am start 45 min drive and not home until 2030/45 in the evening. Nights are 7pm/0745am obs that differs depending on your area.

I hope you find a way, we absolutely need lovely enthusiastic nurses in paediatrics, we have some lovely students with us just now who are really enjoying their placements.
Good luck 🤞