To not want to travel from Scotland to England over Christmas?

[Maria53]

Dealing with some tension at the moment because I live in Scotland and I dont want to travel to England to visit family over Christmas.

We always spend every other christmas with our English relatives and were supposed to do the same this year. However as the situation worsens I really don't want to do that. I get a very limited amount of time off work and I simply dont want to travel twice through airports in a short space of time and mix with 4 relatives from 2 other households

Well I've just told my family this and they are very annoyed with me. No flights booked yet but being told I am.being unreasonable. Need to resolve this either way this week. Thoughts?

The Scottish government has warned the country to prepare for a 'digital Christmas'. And also told students they may not be allowed to go home.

Why, given the above, do your relatives think you'll even be allowed to travel?!

Dont do it then.
Mn is full of these threads every year , it starts in October....will we wont we visit family lol now this year we have covid in the mix .
No one is unreasonable to spend Christmas how they want . 25 th December. One day .
There .

My DDs live in London and I am hoping they can get to us in Scotland for Christmas. However we are not making any plans until much nearer the time because it it likely there will be more restrictions in place not fewer by that point.

OP you need to make it clear to your relatives that it may be you can't get to them at Christmas anyway so you would rather just make plans to stay at home this year. Be firm with this.

YANBU I wouldn't be booking flights. Even if it is allowed, airports are an increased risk and a risk of not getting home. It is an unusual year and tricky to make plans.

I'm in Scotland too and desperately want to see family in the south of England for Christmas but everyone's decided there's too great a risk at the moment (they are 70+), DD and DH are both out of the home coming into contact with people all the time in a high risk area, so didn't seem the best option. Really gutted about it but would be worse if we took the virus down to them when they've been so careful.

There’s signs everywhere that we won’t Be having a normal Christmas....

I’m in the same boat and have no intentions of going to Scotland until about Easter.

Maybe.

I agree with you, stick to your guns

I’d also pass on travelling and a big family Christmas this year, regardless of government guidelines.

Remember how COVID spread so quickly following people’s Italian skiing holidays? It thrives in cozy indoor gatherings. So, frustrating as it is, Christmas provides simply perfect virus spreading conditions. It’s too big a risk for me.

They are being unreasonable. Many people are having to curtail their usual Christmas plans me included. . How can you foretell how things will be at Christmas when rules can change overnight? Even in England areas in different tiers aren’t supposed to visit each other. I don’t know what tier your relatives are but in tier 2&3 visiting rules are very strict. I certainly wouldn’t be going far from home. It’s a bummer but it’s only one year (hopefully).

Threads like this make me laugh. Why would you want to visit these kind of people? They are annoyed at you for expressing concern and wondering the best course of action in a seriously out of control situation! Honestly, the type of people that lay this shit on others are not the type I would want to spend my Christmas with.

Time for a new Christmas routine OP.

I wouldn’t go if you are flying. Personally I wouldn’t want to be on a plane with others and at the airport. Further outbreaks in NZ were traced to the airport which took them back up from zero.

I would like to visit my sisters as one is very ill. I am not going at the moment but it is a real dilemma because I haven’t seen her for two years and might not see her again. However I also don’t want go as she is vulnerable.
Times are very difficult and I think they should respect your decision.

I'd be very reluctant to spend money on flights for Christmas time tbh, regardless of everything else. High chance you lose your money if there are restrictions at either end. Even if you did want to go, pointless to buy tickets until the week before Christmas.

My sis lives alone in London and is desperate to come up for Christmas but I think its going to be unlikely. I suspect we will be in full lockdown by then

No don't go!
My dd and family is in the highlands I'm in Manchester, normally they'd visit over Christmas but aren't this year. I miss them terribly and it will be a year since we saw each other but neither long train journeys or busy airports are sensible places to be if you don't have to just now.

@Maria53

But lockdown isnt likely to go on until Christmas it it? Or is it?

The point is if I dont go none of us in Scotland will go and I'll be blamed for it it seems. Not sure I care - this is a serious situation.

The point is if I dont go none of us in Scotland will go and I'll be blamed for it it seems. Who are the "none of us in Scotland" OP? If it's people outside your household surely they can make their own decisions and leave you to make yours?

In your situation I'd also not travel. My family (England) are currently all in Tier 2 but have various vulnerable people do we're all staying in our own households this year but connecting virtually on Christmas/Boxing Day instead. 🌹

We're in Scotland and not travelling to England or NI.

Absolutely no way.

Or is it your family in Scotland who'll give you a hard time, rather than the ones you'd be going to visit? That's going to be more of a problem to stand up to. You have my sympathy, and also my encouragement to stick by what you believe in. You may well have an opportunity to say "I told you so" later down the line!

It's tough because I have DC in Scotland I haven't seen since February either. But if I travelled up there bearing The Covid I wouldn't be very popular; and if I travelled up there not bearing The Covid, but couldn't get back down again because all travel had been cancelled in the meantime, my welcome would soon wear very thin

YANBU Depending on what tier they're in by then you might not be allowed to stay with them or visit indoors anyway. I definitely wouldn't be booking flights around the likelihood of only being to meet outside......I'm prepared to do this myself but will be driving and have a refundable hotel booked as back up.

There will most definitely be restrictions at Christmas .
I was of the firm belief we would get a Christmas reprieve but no way on earth that will happen now.
Plus , to travel from a very high risk area to a lower one is not a sensible idea and they shouldn’t be expecting you to do that .

I think this just won’t be allowed sadly. It might be possible To visit relatives in the same area but IMO travelling across the UK in a plane for a big get together seems like a bad idea that will quite likely be impossible anyway.

I think there will be more restrictions at christmas. I'm struggling with the thought of driving 5 hours to spend Christmas with parents, all the planning it involves, 2 children all the presents etc, then being told a few days before that we can't go. I don't think I could bear the disappoint, let alone have two upset children as well! I definitely wouldn't be booking flights, you may lose your money and also what about having to rush around last minute to buy Christmas foods and treats!

YABU to be asking ! It's a no brainer! Book nothing . Anything else would be madness

Had a proper sit down with family tonight and said I dont want to go and explained why. They were more reasonable this time and finally said ok we wont go. I feel sad about it but we need to be realistic.

It sort of messes up the christmas routine we've had going for 20 years because we each usually spend xmas with others and then each other again the following year. Throws everything off kilter.

I think we are all of kilter tbh.

My family certainly are - but we will make the best of it.

I'm glad it's been resolved.

It's been a shitty year for everyone and Xmas will be very different for most of us.

That said I count my blessings. Just because we can't have the usual extended family celebrations no one in the family will be alone. We will do lots of zoom calls etc and ensure we all enjoy the day.

In fact it's a reality check that many people spend Xmas alone every year so whinging about spending it with "just" our nuclear family 'tis absurd in context.

You may not even be allowed. We are in England and haven't been allowed to visit my parents for 6 weeks. They are literally round the corner. We've been in a local lockdown since mid September and we are now in tier 2 which doesn't allow households mixing. More of England is moving to this tier all the time. We are allowed people here on holiday but they're not allowed to mix households so even if they come from an area where they're allowed to, they can't for example come here as 2 households and stay in one house.