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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I report this to police?

49 replies

towncalledPalice · 28/10/2020 20:59

I'm a single mum living in a block of flats with my 2 DC, 6 and 1 years old. Today the children were with their grandmother. I came home from town around 5pm and pretty much as soon as I shut the door my flat buzzer went off, it was from a woman saying she lived at flat 21 (the block behind me) and could she come up as she needed to speak to me. I was confused as I'd never experienced anything like this before but let her up anyway. She then accused me of stealing her cigarettes?! She said that she saw me putting my rubbish out earlier, and she had left a pack of cigarettes on the wall, and that she had CCTV evidence of me putting the cigarettes under my buggy (which I also had as I was putting it away in the garage). I told her that I had absolutely no idea what she was talking about, that I hadn't even seen any cigarettes and I've never once smoked in my life! She kept repeating that she had CCTV footage of me, which I repeatedly asked her to show me as I know I did nothing wrong, and she kept changing the subject. Eventually she asked for my mobile number, which I gave her, so she could send me the footage. She never did send any footage, but instead called me half an hour later to say she was sorry, but she had the wrong person and it was apparently someone who "looked like me". At this point I was very upset and felt quite intimidated as she had bought her massive boyfriend along with her too. She kept saying how bad she felt and the conversation ended. The kids were dropped home a while later and as their grandparents were leaving the girl ran out of a car, trying to hug me and saying how sorry she was. By this point I was totally freaked out. My EX MIL knew what happened and luckily got back out her car and told her to clear off and leave me alone. Do you think this is just a case of the girl being a bit nutty or possibly some kind of scam? I don't want to overthink things but it was so odd and she kept going on and on about how these fags had cost her 50 quid.

OP posts:
AcornAutumn · 28/10/2020 22:31

PS don’t answer the phone if she calls you, she might be wanting to see if you’re out.

S111n20 · 28/10/2020 22:33

How strange !! Very odd, hope your ok 💐

OrtamLeevz · 28/10/2020 22:36

@Maddison12

Cigarettes are £10 per pack thoughConfused I think she was hoping she could intimidate you into offering her money for replacement cigs. Probably tried doing this to loads of people, try not to worry.
What if the packet of 'cigarettes' left on the wall actually contained something other than cigarettes and were supposed to be collected by somebody else? Sounds highly likely that drugs were involved somehow.

I'd write down her mobile number and then block it now OP - but don't delete the messages she's already sent you. And as others say, you need to tighten up your security.

caringcarer · 28/10/2020 22:42

She has obviously been watching you. That is creepy. I think I would report just in case she comes back again or follows you.

AcornAutumn · 28/10/2020 22:43

OP also wondering if it’s clear there’s CCTV at the block.

GirlCrush · 28/10/2020 22:48

setting the scene

you now know each other
she knows where you live
has your number

she will be texting to borrow cash by the end of the weekend. guaranteed!

GirlCrush · 28/10/2020 22:49

and you won't say no because she has all that info about you and you know she has a big bloke for good measure

FortunesFave · 28/10/2020 22:54

She probably ran out of cigarettes and wanted to try to intimidate someone into giving her money to replace them. Literally that simple.

Shizzlestix · 28/10/2020 22:58

Block her and don’t give your number out to randomers. Keep yourself safe!

Fairyflaps · 28/10/2020 23:00

Do you have the same landlord?
If you are both in social housing, the housing provider often has someone who is responsible for dealing with anti-social behaviour, and this may an avenue for you to follow up with.
Her behaviour is odd to say the least, whether it is caused by mental health issues or substance use, and it has made you feel very uncomfortable. She may have made similar approaches to your other neighbours.

Barryisland · 28/10/2020 23:02

Phone the police and come back on here to tell us what they say.
I’m always amazed at the number of mumsnetters who say ‘log it with the police’. The police don’t seem to respond to actual crime why should they respond to weird neighbour stories?

GirlCrush · 28/10/2020 23:02

its not a police matter at all

chickenyhead · 28/10/2020 23:07

That's really creepy. I'm sorry but the scenario was fabricated.

Cigarettes do not cost £50. She wanted to see how gullible you are.

Please check who is at your door before opening.

saraclara · 28/10/2020 23:07

They were 'special' cigarettes. Hence them being left on the wall rather than being handed over in person.
And yes, her later behaviour sounds a bit druggie.

Just block her number. There's nothing to tell the police at this point.

Bunnybigears · 28/10/2020 23:10

Sounds like the usual kind of paranoid, over the top behaviour linked to drugs or alcohol misuse. Block her number she will soon forget about you.

MadinMarch · 28/10/2020 23:10

Is anything missing from your flat? money, bank cards, letters (for her to use as proof of address) passport or other ID? Your spare doorkeys/ carkeys?

Unhurried · 28/10/2020 23:17

Barryisland
Phone the police and come back on here to tell us what they say.
I’m always amazed at the number of mumsnetters who say ‘log it with the police’. The police don’t seem to respond to actual crime why should they respond to weird neighbour stories?

Actually, the police log calls and build up intel in just this way.

chickenyhead · 28/10/2020 23:19

The police have designated neighbourhood dispute teams especially for harassment and this type of thing.

They wont do anything until there are more incidents, but you can log them online for record keeping. I would. It was intimidating.

GabsAlot · 28/10/2020 23:31

i thik the cigarettes were something else

but dont let people you dont know in your flat

LizB62A · 28/10/2020 23:33

Hugging you, trying to get to your pockets maybe?
Had you let her into your flat?
Might she have been trying to see if you had anything worth nicking ?

MingeofDeath · 28/10/2020 23:39

I can't believe that you gave her your number

Jent13c · 29/10/2020 06:23

Not sure what kind of flats you are in but when I lived in a block of 4 dodgy flats my neighbour kept her crack pipe and supplies in the security light outside so that when the police came round it wasn't in her possession. Does she think you touched her stash?

JamminDoughnuts · 29/10/2020 06:58

she sounds like she has mental health issues.
can't hurt logging it op.

TheTamingOfTheresa · 29/10/2020 08:15

Definitely get it logged with the police as an incident. You can do it online. You could copy and paste what you’ve posted on here. Take you 2 minutes and then it’s logged and they’ve got all the details just in case . Then have a brandy / strong cup of coffee. What a horrible thing to happen x

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