To think that 39mins to bedtime is a fast job?

[stealthbanana]

Just had this article from the Indy pop up in my newsfeed.

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/uk-parents-bedtime-nine-days-year-compare-market-a9700981.html?fbclid=IwAR0m8p6jmMBWshyETjtbf-GmY5-92GdIHaUuDMnSU56-byO57c28SbdYMJE

Am genuinely flabbergasted that people can get their kids to bed in

@2Rebecca

Agree you don't stay with the child until they're asleep. Bath, teeth, story, good night kiss.

Easy to say but not all kids will self-settle no matter what you do from being a baby. I've even had specialists involved. I managed to get my nephew to self settle and helped my friend to get her DD to self settle but my DD - categorically will not! Never has from the moment she could stand in the cot 🥱😑😴

Five potatoes I think.

It's about 30 mins in my house. One 3 year old

6 and 8 here but the 6 year old isn't all that independent and the 8 year old has SEN.
6 year old is about 40 minutes (including teeth, nappy, messing about, story, toilet, toilet again).
8 year old is about 25 minutes (not including his supper but including teeth, pyjamas and story).

@DC3Dakota Leaving him awake would be a car crash here, hes only been able to get to sleep on his own for about 3/4 months, but it isn’t reliably every night. Luckily he is generally a good sleeper so tends to fall asleep quickly, it used to take a good two hours of being in bed with him when he was younger.

Doable without bath. Def much quicker when school age

It used to take 45 mins when mine were similar ages to yours op. We'd go up at 6.45 for bath etc and I'd be coming back downstairs at 7.30.

Sounds about right from my memory. Used to finish dinner about 7.15 in bed by 8 as little ones, quicker still when they were older as they showered from around 6 years old in the morning

@DC3Dakota surely the 'suggested' bedtime depends on what time the child has to get up and how much sleep they need?

DC is 2.5 and takes 10 minutes roughly, if that. He bathes earlier in the evening, not straight before bed. That's a 15 minute job.

Then at bedtime, it's brush teeth, PJs on, kiss and into bed. Job done for us. He goes up at 7pm and DH starts getting his PJs on and doing teeth 10 minutes before.

Including baths, where the children play for 15 minutes or so each it probably takes 45 minutes to an hour. Children are 4 and 2.

Not including baths, it's into pjs, brush teeth, wash face, have a wee/change nappy, story in bed, then sleep. Doesn't take more than 20/25 minutes to do both of them.

They do go straight to sleep though, both of mine are great for bed (after being very naughty babies who woke constantly and would only sleep nicely on me for the first year of their lives!).

This is partially down to 1) luck and 2) having a really strong routine that doesn't change.

Furst off I didn't bathe them every night.
Not necessary and dries out their skin.

40 would have done it with ease.

I would have gone absolutely bloody mad if it had taken 1-2 hours to get my children to sleep after a long day doing my best with them.

No way.

About 20 /30 minutes here, drink of milk at 630 after tea, brush teeth then pyjamas and story in bed. Almost 4 year old twins. I started doing baths of an early morning or before tea if rainy afternoon in. We keep it as short as possible and find they go to sleep quicker, usually by 7 as soon as lights out after story. They usually get bad tempered or silly through tiredness if it takes too long.

I don't think a long bedtime means shit parent. Every child is different. My 3 year old can be asleep 10 minutes after coming upstairs. But it's nothing to do with me he's just willing to go to sleep!

Agree, it means nothing. If I had to bath mine every evening I would take far longer but I am able to do it earlier in the day.

@MsChatterbox thanks for saying that! We mostly have a long bedtime. So etimes it's the only time I spend with them all day if I'm working. We enjoy it, it's not a chore.

Other times it is much shorter, but that's generally if there's no bath and it's already time to get into bed.

It can be anything from 20 minutes to 2 hours with a 3 and 5 yr old. If it's 2 hours it's because theyve had a long bath and we're having "quality time" not because they won't go to bed.

It takes about 45 mins in our house. But bedtime routine starts with “family game” where we all play a board game for 10 minutes or so, then it’s upstairs where DS decides it’s time for a luxury poo (he hates going at school, so saves it for home!) where he sits and chats away. Then teeth, face washed etc, and then books, and then final made up story in bed (yes, every night he wants me to make up a story for him, they tend to be short and involve farting dinosaurs more often than not).

As he’s at school all day, and we are working, it’s lovely to have this time with him: it’s when I find out most about his day, and all his thoughts and worries

5 and 3 year old. On average I’d say about 15/20 min per child if it’s not bath day. Pjs, teeth, final pee and they get 2 books. Oldest has to read a word on each page which can slow it down. DH and I usually do one each if he’s home. So yes if I had to do both kids by myself it would take about 30-40min

Baths take longer. But I do them right after dinner and then they get to play in pjs for a little bit. We aim for 3 times a week. 5 year old likes to shower now so that’s pretty fast too.

@Hardbackwriter

It says it was a survey of parents with children aged 3-10 - I suspect the average for the parents of 3 year olds was quite different to that for the parents of 10 year olds.

I think this most definitely the reason why the average is 39 minutes!! Most three yr olds won't be anywhere near that, but a ten yr old won't take very long at all, no need to do stories most likely, no need to supervise, probably have a shower rather than a bath!

If someone can get a whole toddler bedtime routine done in 39 minutes...could you come and teach me everything you know please?? 🤣

My 5 year old can no joke take 8 hours to settle

@Mulhollandmagoo I was wondering the opposite - what can people be doing with toddlers that mean it takes more than 40 minutes
But it seems from this thread that some people do long baths, periods of playing inbetween each "step" of the routine, long sessions of reading stories and then lying in bed with the child.
I just do a short bath, straight to teeth/pjs with no playing, 1 or 2 stories and don't stay with them after lights out.

If someone can get a whole toddler bedtime routine done in 39 minutes...could you come and teach me everything you know please?? 🤣

I dunno really, mine were pretty much always happy to go to bed. After story time downstairs which they loved, I'd just say, "yay, it's finally time for bed!" and as soon as they could walk they were up the stairs like a rat up a drainpipe, quick brush of teeth and into bed, tuck in, kiss and leave them to it. Ds2 would tell me from a very early age that he was "tired-er than a bag of snakes" I still have no idea what he meant...

I don't claim to be a perfect parent. I'm 90% sure that it was personality rather than good management. However I was never one to take any shit and I think they learned that early on. Also, always made bedtime sound like the best time ever and they bought it :o

Oh and i have never ever been asked for 5 more minutes/a glass of water etc etc. The only times they haven't slept through were very early baby days or when they weren't well. Though DS1 did sleep through the night before we left the hospital. That didn't last but I'd say form about 3/4 months they both slept through reliably every night for a good 8-10 hours, would wake, have a feed and go back for a few more hours.

I timed it tonight and from saying 'ok, let's go upstairs' to having to pop back into his room for (I hope) the last time took 48 minutes. That includes the bath, moisturising (he has eczema) and PJs, teeth and three stories. I had to go back in twice (and change his nappy on the first of these as he had called me in to inform me that he'd done a poo) so that added on about 10 minutes so I guess if he hadn't called me back in - which does happen on a good night - I'd have got pretty spot on the average...

Our bedtime routine with 3 (5,4,10m) works like a dream and they are all out like a light with in 45mins of going upstairs! This is great and I'd possibly feel quite smug about it all if at least one of them slept through the night!