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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How ill is too ill for nursery?

89 replies

Tyrannynormus · 23/10/2020 11:28

Two year old DD is my first so I'm new to all this 😂

DD has had a cold pretty much all week now, with a mucus cough that's pretty bad if shes been lying down, occasionally a temp too. I'm pretty sure its not Corona, just a bad cold.

Her dad says send her to nursery shell be fine (he used to be a nursery worker)

AIBU to keep her off this afternoon, shes not due back in till Monday so a few more days go feel better.
No one slept last night as she kept waking up and shes just slept over an hour now and still doesn't want to get out of bed, just wants to lay and snuggle and watch her nursery rhymes on tv. Shes not long started nursery though and I'm worried shell get out of the routine of going, she already gets up set being left Sad

OP posts:
Freddiefox · 23/10/2020 13:04

I’d be really worried about the nursery and why they think they are above the guidance! No way should any child be in nursery with a cough or and temp. They should be tested or stay home for 14 days

Notemyname · 23/10/2020 13:17

As someone who is now into our second period of having to self isolate with my DC after positive tests of other children at nursery, your nursery policy makes me a bit mad. Ours were quite slack initially, but when they had to close the whole nursery in because they hadn't been following the guidance properly, the financial consequences for their business and backlash from parents resulted in a massive overhaul of their policies.

This second time isolating for us is just bad luck as we're a high risk area so the virus is everywhere, but to think your nursery is contributing to a whole group of children and parents being affected would make me question if I want to keep sending my child there.

Your DH will care when it's your family getting the call at 9pm the night before that your child can't go to nursery next morning and needs to self isolate while you both have to take time off work to look after them for a fortnight. . . . .

TheDowagerDuchessofMwwwahaha · 23/10/2020 13:20

She sounds much too ill for nursery. Can’t believe your DH thought she could possibly go in, poor thing.

With Covid about, yes she should isolate and be tested. Or if not tested isolate form14 days.

CallmeFP · 23/10/2020 13:21

Even without covid, if she has a nasty virus the kind thing to do is keep her home - firstly for her sake and secondly please think of staff and other children, they do not want it.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 23/10/2020 13:23

I have never heard of a nursery happy to take a child with a temperature ever! Tbh I wouldn’t be happy for my child to go to such a place either.

MindfulBear · 23/10/2020 13:29

Volatile Temperature &/or lethargy is a reason to keep off nursery. I would.

And to address some of the comments on here..... A cough is not an automatic reason to get a Covid test. Am very surprised people on here are so ill informed. The Covid cough is a specific cough so only a continuous cough would mean testing is recommended.

The rest is pretty horrific so am also stunned people are so blase about subjecting a 2yo willy nilly to such an invasive process.

Wishing your little one a speedy recovery.

catnoir1 · 23/10/2020 13:34

You need to get your dd tested.

I'm surprised with everything going on and with your husband previously working in a nursery setting that you wouldn't get your dd tested.

Guidance is very clear on this.

I doubt very much that 111 said what you're saying they said because of the symtpoms your dd has.

Thefaceofboe · 23/10/2020 13:34

@MindfulBear A cough is not an automatic reason to get a Covid test

OP has stated her child’s temp has been up and down... so cough and temperature clearly means a Covid test. The test really isn’t horrific so stop scaremongering.

Mangofandangoo · 23/10/2020 13:42

To be honest I would (and have) sent dd to preschool with a cough after discussing it with her teachers first to check they were comfortable with it. I would absolutely not send with a temperature at the moment though

Just yet a covid test and then you'll know. Imagine if she actually had it and you sent her in when you could have just got a test

Ilovegreentomatoes · 23/10/2020 13:53

I work in a nursery and if a child has calpol they can not come into nursery the next day.If we get permission to give it at the nursery(high temp) then the child still has to go home and not allowed in the next day.

HazeyJaneII · 23/10/2020 13:54

a new, continuous cough– this means coughing a lot for more than an hour, or 3 or more coughing episodes in 24 hours (if you usually have a cough, it may be worse than usual)
This is from the NHS symptoms list

With children it is possible to test just up the nose, as it can often be difficult to test in the throat. It does not have to be 'horrific'

peboh · 23/10/2020 13:56

I would send dd with a cough/runny nose, however I wouldn't send her with a high temp/fever.
In your case, I would get her tested for covid as being pretty sure isn't a good enough non diagnoses when there's a risk of infecting others if she does have it as it doesn't sound like you've been isolating given you're considering sending her.

Emma10702 · 23/10/2020 13:56

I can’t believe your nursery are willing to take her. I’m a childcare provider and I would ask for a negative test before I would allow her back based on the term & cough. We are never going to get this under control at this rate. So frustrating.

TeddyIsaHe · 23/10/2020 13:58

and they just require permission to give calpol if she has a temp

Op if nursery have told you this I’d leave immediately. They are ONLY allowed to give medication prescribed by a dr, and I’d be reporting them to OFSTED.

Or you just made that up so you can send your kid back without a covid test Hmm

MitziK · 23/10/2020 13:59

@MindfulBear

Volatile Temperature &/or lethargy is a reason to keep off nursery. I would.

And to address some of the comments on here..... A cough is not an automatic reason to get a Covid test. Am very surprised people on here are so ill informed. The Covid cough is a specific cough so only a continuous cough would mean testing is recommended.

The rest is pretty horrific so am also stunned people are so blase about subjecting a 2yo willy nilly to such an invasive process.

Wishing your little one a speedy recovery.

The guidance says 'cough', not 'cough that you've heard about on the internet is a particular type you've not heard before' or 'cough that makes it impossible to sleep'. It says cough. And continuous is also defined, so isn't the 'food went down the wrong way' type.

I am surprised you're so ill informed that you're saying a child with a cough isn't a reason to test. It certainly is, even before a temperature is also noted.

Original poster
Tyrannynormus · 23/10/2020 14:23

@TeddyIsaHe

and they just require permission to give calpol if she has a temp

Op if nursery have told you this I’d leave immediately. They are ONLY allowed to give medication prescribed by a dr, and I’d be reporting them to OFSTED.

Or you just made that up so you can send your kid back without a covid test Hmm

It's in the handbook type thing I recieved from nursery when she started. I was also asked to sign a permission slip giving consent for them to give her calpol but only after receiving verbal consent each time. The nursery is rated good by OFSTED.
OP posts:
Bringmewineandcake · 23/10/2020 14:39

If a child needs calpol they shouldn't be at nursery.

nitsandwormsdodger · 23/10/2020 15:10

In normal times I've sent a vomiting child to nursery and before her chicken pox scabbed over , I know this is wrong and bad for others but I was in precarious job situation and needed to keep my job .... now it's a mater of others life and death so get a test ASAP and take it from there
It's tough definitely

SqidgeBum · 23/10/2020 15:33

@nitsandwormsdodger ah, so you are the type of Mom that causes me to have to keep my vomiting, miserable child at home, and face questions over my number of sick days, and face my unhappy boss who has to find cover for my lessons when there is no budget, because I am a teacher and I cant in good faith bring a vomiting bug into my school, causing problems for my students and their parents. I also cannot morally leave my miserable chid in a nursery, when all she wants is cuddles with Mama.

Cheers. I mean, as long as your job isn't pissed at you, thats the main thing.

HazeyJaneII · 23/10/2020 16:33

@nitsandwormsdodger

In normal times I've sent a vomiting child to nursery and before her chicken pox scabbed over , I know this is wrong and bad for others but I was in precarious job situation and needed to keep my job .... now it's a mater of others life and death so get a test ASAP and take it from there It's tough definitely
You know that Covid isnt the only disease in the world that we should try and prevent the spread of, and d&v and chicken pox can be extremely dangerous for some children....please, please don't send children that should be quarantined, for any reason, into an early years setting. Please.
CottonSock · 23/10/2020 16:35

Glad that's not my nursery.

Thespottytortoise · 23/10/2020 16:39

She needs a test.
Until the results come back, you self isolate as a family.

No wonder cases are rising.

aSofaNearYou · 23/10/2020 16:42

My DD's nursery will take her with a cold but not a cough, they also won't administer medicine at the moment so she may also be quite distressed if you sent her in and she is unwell.

Nanny0gg · 23/10/2020 16:58

If they're poorly enough to want their bed or constant cuddles plus no sleep then they stay at home (ignoring covid)

Rosebel · 23/10/2020 17:12

I'm not convinced your nursery said that, or if they did that you played down her symptoms. I don't understand why you seem so determined not to get a test, just do it.
It's not pleasant but takes seconds and is not horrific.
Please just get her tested.
Oh and to the poster happy to send her sick child to nursery, don't be so selfish. Your child is ill and you make everyone else sick. Why are you so much more important than everyone else?