Am I the only person who thinks parents should feed their kids outside of school?

[HalloweenDoughnutAnyone]

Obviously it goes without saying I don't want any child to go hungry. But. Am I the only person who thinks parents should feed their kids outside of school?

Just that really.. it's free school dinners. Not free lunch all year round.

I don't understand why people think the tax payer should be paying even more? Maybe, if you can't afford to cover the basics (food and clothing) you should think twice before having a child?

Or should we extend free school dinners, to cover all the food a child needs inside and outside of school ?

I'm not tarring everyone with the same brush but I know people who rely on free school dinners. But have sky tv, expensive mobile contracts etc

There is no way that the caseload of any social worker contains 100% of parents who are deliberately selfish and neglectful

No-one with mental health issues? No-one with disabilities? No-one with learning difficulties? No-one with problems after leaving DV? No-one struggling with childhood abuse?

Just neglectful, selfish parents? Not a chance.

Besides which, of the parents who get FSM, absuive and neglectful ones are the tiny minority.

And that doesn't even matter because the children still need fed regardless of why they are going unfed. Leaving them to go hungry in the holidays out of principle is not acceptable in a civilised society.

@Jaxhog

I'm 50/50 on this.

Me too. I absolutely support short term help during pandemics and when parents fall into circs beyond their control. But, I also see far too many parents having child after child and expecting the rest of us to pick up the tab. That is NOT what the welfare state was set up to do. I have no idea what we can do about it though.

We do pick up the tab with child benefits which is only right. That's there to cover the essentials. The tax payers shouldn't be hit twice though to pay for other people's kids. During a pandemic, sure. Parents need to take responsibility more generally though for their own children.

My word you are all evil trolls . I have been trying to say I help lots of families, however some are not help able, however you all seem to know better . I would never let a child go without. . I am however saying some parents are responsible.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

Seems like I am getting abused for saying bad parents exist. ? Maybe start taking a closer look at your neighbour's, friends; relatives . The parents who spend their vouchers in tesco on wine and beer? Oh and maybe the token burgers and pizzas. Whilst I would love to stop every child from going hungry, it isn't that easy .

Are you a Conservative Politician ?

Stop with the BS
We all know there are bad parents out there. Some people might consider you to have questionable values as a parent when you seem determined not to or incapable of grasping that At the end of the day children need to be taken care of whether that’s their parents the wider family or the state

Even if parents are arseholes - and that is so often not the case in these situations!!- the children should not be penalised.

I was a hungry child in the 1980s. My mum was an alcoholic and had schizophrenia and my Dad was was often away from home and basically just left my Mum to get on with it. School holidays were utterly miserable for me as very often my Mum would just forget to feed me - we’re talking when I was 4-9 years old here (before that I can’t remember and after that I went to live with my Gran). She wouldn’t eat either, she would just sit on the sofa and stare into space. I would try and play quietly around her or in another room as I didn’t want to disturb her. She was never physically abusive to me and at times she could be very loving, but she was often just not mentally present. I remember going through cupboards trying to find stuff to eat. Once I ate a whole loaf of bread that had been on the side because it was the only thing we had and then my Dad came home and told me off- I was about 4.

I have a very odd relationship with food as a result and overstock my own fridge now as a parent. I spent fortunes on food because I cannot stand the thought of not having a full cupboard.

I donate regularly to food banks. I’m not sure if my own Mum would have taken me somewhere to get food, but if the school had been more involved and places were offering free meals / Vouchers maybe my life might have been better.

I find it really upsetting that children are still going through similar things to me.

Evil trolls because we disagree with you?

That's class. Absolute class.

Pandemic or not, no kid should go hungry in this country. The majority will be genuine cases who struggle to put food on the table. And for those who piss any money away on fags/booze/drugs/whatever, so fucking what! It's not the kids fault. Should a kid go hungry just to prove a point. It's shameless.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

My word you are all evil trolls . I have been trying to say I help lots of families, however some are not help able, however you all seem to know better . I would never let a child go without. . I am however saying some parents are responsible.

So this food you’re apparently delivering to kids as a social worker... who is paying for it?

Yeah, we're the evil trolls - the ones not ideologically opposed to feeding the hungry children of parents with mobiles and broadband.

@FourTeaFallOut

Yeah, we're the evil trolls - the ones not ideologically opposed to feeding the hungry children of parents with mobiles and broadband.

How do expect parents without mobiles and broadband to apply for jobs, claim UC, keep in touch with school, keep track of their bank accounts, not become completely isolated in this pandemic? It's not 1950, the world has moved on. Things that would not have been essential in the pre internet and digital age are now integral to day to day life. Suggesting poor parents shouldn't have mobiles or broadband is the same as saying the 1950's parent shouldn't have a wireless or a shopping trolley.

And the government cannot be held responsible

The government absolutely is responsible. They’re responsible for a benefits system that keeps people in poverty, for inadequate mental health services, for structural inequalities that foster inter generational adversity, for underfunding public services that would act to advocate for and support struggling families, for the lack of decent, accessible rehab facilities, for the shit show that is social housing, for making it nearly impossible to protect all but the most at risk children, for turning care for older people into a profiteering industry, for undermining workers rights, for the erosion of human rights, for housing policies the price people out of the market for decent, affordable housing, for imposing sanctions that leave people literally without money, for leaving vulnerable people with no recourse to public funds, for supporting an insecure gig economy.

I’d hope, as a social worker, that you understood the direct impact of government decision and policy making on the lives of people who are most vulnerable.

“Bad” parents usually have significant trauma histories and significant mental health issues with minimal supports or treatment available. “Bad” parents often are living out the consequences of their own experience of being poorly parented - none of this happens in a vacuum. It happens against a government determined to exacerbate structural inequality and demonise the poor as being feckless agents of their own destiny.

Where the fuck did you do your training to be so blind to the role of government policy in the daily lives of the people they purport to represent.

No point in a discussion . You all seem blinkered. Let me know how it goes when you are the person trying to help these families. I truly hope you have a better outcome .

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

No point in a discussion . You all seem blinkered. Let me know how it goes when you are the person trying to help these families. I truly hope you have a better outcome .

Who pays for the food parcels you’re giving to these children?

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

I am trying to say every child deserves a good warm , well fed upbringing, however some parents do not have the same attitude . And the government cannot be held responsible.

i believe that Madonnawiththebigboobies is a social worker, having two disabled kids you wouldn't believe the lengths that some public sector professionals go to to deny vulnerable children access to services because apparently 'the government cannot be held responsible'.

I have no idea how they sleep at night.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

No point in a discussion . You all seem blinkered. Let me know how it goes when you are the person trying to help these families. I truly hope you have a better outcome .

It's extremely amusing that you think you are the only person that helps families.

The ego is amazing. You really should be a politician.

My word you are all evil trolls . I have been trying to say I help lots of families, however some are not help able, however you all seem to know better

I’m not an evil troll. I’m a social worker with 25 years experience of working with vulnerable families who understands that landscape those families are trying to navigate and who thinks the government frankly need to do better. And in the meantime, they can sacrifice their pay rises and subsidised gravy train to bloody well feed children.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

I am trying to say every child deserves a good warm , well fed upbringing, however some parents do not have the same attitude . And the government cannot be held responsible.

And your last sentence is just plain wrong. It’s why we’ve got a welfare state - or at least what remains of it.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

No point in a discussion . You all seem blinkered. Let me know how it goes when you are the person trying to help these families. I truly hope you have a better outcome .

Blinkered because absolutely nobody agrees with you that children should be abandoned by the government when their parents won’t feed them?

Where is it you work? Is it definitely social work?

@FourTeaFallOut

Yeah, we're the evil trolls - the ones not ideologically opposed to feeding the hungry children of parents with mobiles and broadband.

I'll add to my response.... my great grandparents lived in Jarrow in the 1930's. They needed social assistance due to chronic unemployment. They were only allowed a limited number of household items including a kettle, a double bed, a table and enough chairs for the adults in the household (children had to sit on the bare floor to eat). My great grandad was a bit of a technological whizz (of his time). Before he lost his job, he built a crystal radio set. Cost him pennies as he was thrifty and resourceful. That radio set brought music and joy into their bare and barren little house. He couldn't have sold it really as it was a homemade affair and no one else in jarrow had cash for such things. He hid it in a cupboard as he was terrified if the 'welfare' man saw it he would be forced to destroy it to 'prove' him and his family were truly destitute. The welfare man didn't find it and it started a chain of interest throughout the generations in technology and telecommunications that ensured employment for my granda and dad. That's what you propose when you say modern parents shouldn't have mobiles and broadband. That judgement from you is shameful

@FourTeaFallOut I apologise whole heartedly. I think I miss read your post so I am sorry my rants are tagged to you unfairly. I stand by my comments though.

@crimblecrumbleofcourse you’ve completely misread @FourTeaFallOut’s post. She said ‘not ideologically opposed’.

X post!

crimblecrumbleofcourse

We are in agreement, although I was, in frustration, being sarcastic which isn't always clear on here, I suppose.