Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed when dh works on all his days off?

4 replies

museumum · 21/10/2020 18:34

Both have professional jobs, his higher paid than mine but that’s the sectors were in. I run my own business and work 4-4.5 days most weeks. I work very hard on my work/life balance and being present with dc when with them. He’s f/t.

Dh has worked at least half of every day he’s had off since lockdown began. Today for example was our only day off for half term. Lovely family morning and lunch (though I caught him doing emails on his phone at lunch in the cafe)., I got an hour to do my thing at home then he worked from 2:30ish till now.
Every single “day off” he’s like this 4-5 hours work gets done before breakfast or “after” whatever family thing we do. .
It’s “his” time, not interfering with me really (dc doing own thing) although I’d prefer his company so AIBU to be annoyed? I’m not even sure why it annoys me so much. I just wish I didn’t feel like we are an unwelcome distraction in his proper (work) life.
Sigh.

Go on, tell me I’m BU. I kind of know I am.

OP posts:
TheDowagerDuchessofMwwwahaha · 21/10/2020 19:46

Hmmm

Kind of yes and no

I think it’s probably unhealthy for him to be so focussed on his work as he’s not giving himself time off. Also I can see how it’s insulting and not much fun to be an after thought!

Then again, at least he does do the family things on days off, and the kids aren’t little from what you say, so can entertain themselves. And of course he’s at least being paid for this.

Have you talked to him about it? It would be nice if he showed he enjoyed your company more!

MitziK · 21/10/2020 20:09

It's healthier for him to have proper time off.

Whether or not he decides to take the healthier option, for whatever reason, that's really up to him, though.

alphasox · 21/10/2020 20:12

I’m married to one of these too and we argue about it a lot. He’s never present for the kids, just lets them do their own thing while he works, or he’s taking work calls while we are doing family things/on holiday. He hasn’t asked me about my job for years. He’s always asking my opinion and advice on his business, it’s like he lives and breathes his work. I have no advice sorry, just solidarity and a hug 🤗

EmmaGrundyForPM · 22/10/2020 09:40

YANBU but I think it's difficult for him. My dh does this and it drives me potty. Then I changed job and now often end up having to work on a Saturday to get things finished off. So I have far more sympathy for him than I used to!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread