To be worried about staying sane stuck inside all winter with a 2 year old?

[Lardeedar]

Is anyone else struggling at home with a 1-3 year old that isn’t in nursery? My options before were park, playgroup, or friends/family visit at theirs but now The weather is turning I’m just having to keep her inside all day every day and we are both losing our minds!! The playgroups are all shut and now not allowed in anyone’s house.

You know the age where they won’t stick at anything for more than 2 minutes because all they want to do is explore new objects, places, people?! She literally cries when she sees that we’re coming home.

There’s a few outdoor play sessions Thank Goodness but mostly they are shutting everything down. I’m genuinely worried about her development and my mental health being cooped up with her crying continually asking for Hours and hours of tv. Anyone else?

Some great suggestions here for indoor and outdoor activities.

Three of my five DC are under the age of 3 years, so I will definitely try some of these.

Suggestions are good for motivated mums who can see the point in them. But I assume the rates of PND, depression, anxiety (health anxiety and general anxiety) are through the roof. I have no stats in front of me about them, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that social isolation, possible job loss, no family support will result in poor outcomes for mums, DC and families.

The attitudes I've heard about children - mainly school children - have been disgusting. In essence refering to them as Covid vectors, dirty and noisy. I reckon this attitude is also held by many about little children too.

Yes, there is joy in the same things of nature walks, playing with beads in the living room and movie nights on sofa. But no social interaction, no seeing gran and mum washing her hands and bleaching groceries as she slides into a mental health crisis will not help create resilient and healthy DC.

Rant over

If you can afford it maybe put DC into a nursery a couple of mornings or afternoons a week where they can play with other kids without socially distancing and nurseries are great and doing activities a parent/carer wouldn’t bother doing! They also get to eat lots of different healthy food they would probably reject at home!

StillCounting123 completely agree. I don’t think it’s been helped by lots of people who don’t currently have small children saying (Often contradictory!) things like “How hard is it to entertain a toddler/baby?” “Why did you have children if you didn’t want to look after them” “in days gone by the women didn’t entertain their children all the time or have groups to go to” “in the war XYZ awful thing happened and women just got on with it” and all that. This situation in this world as it is now is unprecedented and most people’s lives were not set up to take these circumstances into account. Making people feel like they are failing for finding it hard does not help, especially when the safety nets are no longer there for any but the severest cases

Ahh I feel you OP although I only have to entertain my 2 yr old 3 days a week as I work. Luckily she goes to nursery so I'm not worried about her social interaction etc but even so, it is going to be a particularly tough winter on the other days. I'm in a city in the NW where it frequently rains for weeks and weeks in end in winter and is v v windy, I was giggling at PP upthread who claimed days like that are rare, where do you live?! Our DD has also been out of only nappies two months and has suddenly started very frequent small accidents prior to going the toilet, and we don't have a car, so that's another barrier to going anywhere that is actually open. Children's centres aren't running any groups for kids in this city, swimming pools are now completely closed and even when they weren't it was impossible to get booked onto a family swim as they only allowed TWO families at once and were totally booked up every time I checked. The museum we went to once a few months ago which wasn't even worth it as all the interactive things are removed or taped over etc and my daughter obviously doesn't understand a one way system! The play cafe has closed down and so has another accessible soft play. Pre booking also makes it particularly difficult to get to places without a car because public transport is unreliable and I can't guarantee my daughter won't suddenly need a poo meaning we miss the bus and would miss our entire slot at soft play or whatever because the next one won't come for another 30+ minutes for example.

Also, we are a family who go out in most weathers and like PP whenever we go to the park on a dry but cold ish day there are very few other kids there and on wet days usually none at all. So I'm always surprised to see everyone on MN saying to go out in all weathers, I suspect most of those PPs do not in fact have small children right now.

Get the right clothing.
Get the right boots.
Go out every day.

Many people are suffering much more than mums of toddlers who don't know how to keep them busy. Funding is very sparse, I much prefer it goes to vulnerable children and adults than bored mum

No one is saying others aren't suffering more, neither is anyone advocating for funding to be taken away from anyone else to go to "board mums" as you so kindly put it.

Op and the rest of us are allowed to feel concerned and worried about the prospect of a winter with very little to do to keep a toddlers life enriched.

Many of us also feel that the services that have been taken away - such as children centres and free toddler groups should either be reinstated, or an alternative such as some free nursery time provided.

Why does it always have to be a competition for who's the most disadvantaged.

Op and the rest of us are allowed to feel concerned and worried about the prospect of a winter with very little to do to keep a toddlers life enriched.

Of course people are allowed to be concerned, but loads of people have suggested things and most them have been shot down for even trying to be optimistic about it all.

Nobody is denying it's going to be tough and unusual compared to normal but that doesn't mean people have to sit inside for months and complain about the lack of toddler groups available. There are options out there - you may not like the sound of them, but they should keep young children fairly well entertained over winter.

Hand warmers. Stick them inside your gloves. You're welcome.

@vanillandhoney

Op and the rest of us are allowed to feel concerned and worried about the prospect of a winter with very little to do to keep a toddlers life enriched.

Of course people are allowed to be concerned, but loads of people have suggested things and most them have been shot down for even trying to be optimistic about it all.

Nobody is denying it's going to be tough and unusual compared to normal but that doesn't mean people have to sit inside for months and complain about the lack of toddler groups available. There are options out there - you may not like the sound of them, but they should keep young children fairly well entertained over winter.

I appreciate there have been lots of useful suggestions. But if, say, you’re not in a tier two or three area, how can toddlers socialise properly with other children this winter? It seems like the only option is nursery.

Sorry, you ARE* in a tier 2/3 area

All the outdoor stuff, we do that already, we did it last year, we did it the year before, I have a baby and a toddler and god knows I’m the most sickeningly irritating “strap the baby in a carrier, tog everyone up appropriately and go out and romp the fields and woods in all weathers” type. But I appreciate that it’s not for everyone and it was/is my choice and also there were other options - the fact that it’s the ONLY option is part of what is hard, there is no variety and many of us have been doing it for a long time so it’s not like outdoor activities are new, the suggestions are all over social media and most of us have and continue to do them. Hearing from people who raised their toddlers a couple of decades ago (I’m talking in general - not anyone specific on this thread as I have no idea) that it’s about a positive mindset or whatever is completely unhelpful, when did that sort of thing ever help anyone. In my area there is NOTHING indoors that is suitable for preschoolers, other than the church thing I mentioned upthread. My toddler is fairly self sufficient at home so we do ok, but I know that for many this is a real challenge.

I appreciate there have been lots of useful suggestions. But if, say, you’re not in a tier two or three area, how can toddlers socialise properly with other children this winter? It seems like the only option is nursery.

But the OP wasn't really talking about socialisation - she just said she was stuck inside all day with a whinging toddler and people were just pointing out that she didn't have to be. There are plenty of things to do outside, you just need to dress appropriately.

Even in Tier 2 you can still meet outside as long as you stick to the group of 6, so there's nothing stopping people meeting up with a friend and going for a walk in the park or something so the children can play together and socialise. You also don't need a mask outside which is another benefit of it.

Admittedly tier 3 will be harder (as will a full lockdown) but there are still plenty of ways to keep children entertained over the winter.

I just think the defeatist attitudes of "we're stuck indoors for months, there's no way we can ever go out until Spring" isn't going to help anyone and will just make a tough time even tougher.

but loads of people have suggested things and most them have been shot down for even trying to be optimistic about it all.

There have been alot of good suggestions. There have also been some pretty stupid suggestions of how to entertain toddlers (sewing and board games, come on really) But there has also been an attitude from some of, just put on the appropriate clothes get outside and stop moaning. Which is not practical or feasible for everyone, does not resolve the issue of social interaction and Tbh is not going to entertain a toddler for 6 months, wandering around the woods is going to get pretty old pretty quick if it's the only thing to do.

I coulndt think of anything worse than being dragged around the woods when I was a kid, especially not in the cold. In fact I often would be and I hated it.

Personally I'm taking mine out every day, to indoor and outdoor activities. My 2yo DD still enjoys all her favourite toddler classes despite the social distancing required. She's still mostly playing in parallel with other dc, so she benefits from observing them but isn't actually interested in interacting with them much yet. The classes are expensive, but we can afford it as we're not paying expensive childcare or having to run a car to commute.

We also live in London, near lots of attractions like museums and galleries, which are mostly free and are always good to spend a rainy day inside. We can only afford to live somewhere like this because we compromised on having a small flat with no outdoor space though, basically our lifestyle has always depended on not spending much time at home. But I have friends who have moved out to the suburbs so aren't able to visit the museums here, but they have big playrooms and gardens and spend hours just playing at home.

Anyone got any ideas for the inevitable periods in self isolation when you can't go out, which I suspect very few people will avoid...

My 2 were vile after one day, bouncing off the walls and climbing the furniture...

I can do wet outside, I can do cold outside, wet and windy is dodgy, as is strong winds...

What I struggle with is wet/cold plus not allowed beyond garden as we're in rented so can't afford to destroy the already swampy lawn completely (kids would happily wallow in a mud pit).

@randomsabreuse when we couldn’t get out due to very horrible weather or illness, I found it helped to include something energetic and something creative during the day.

Energetic -
Bubbles
Soft balls to play catch or kick
Skittles set
Cushions on the floor to avoid the crocodiles
Copying exercises or dances from YouTube
Chasing games
tickling, pillow fights

Creative
Colouring, drawing, painting
Painting boxes or toilet rolls
Painting by numbers
Kitchen or toilet roll craft
Cutting magazine pictures and sticking them on to paper
Making snowflakes
Sticker books
Hobby craft have some cheap craft sets and things like masks you can paint or decorate.

Hopefully they can watch tv or play with toys by themselves for the rest of the time!

@Sitt I think you've phrased it really well.

@snowtoad I'm similar to you, except I moved to London in January so I had no friends to meet up with and I'm very vulnerable do wasn't sure how safe it was to meet up with other people initially.

He's three. Of course we aren't the worst off during this, but I've really struggled with loneliness and depression.

This thread is making me worried for some parents' mental health. I work compressed hours so I have a weekday off with DS - I used to run a music group for babies and toddlers, but that's obviously not going on now that covid is around. Does anyone reckon an outdoor music group (we're rural, there's tons of open space) would be ok within the rules? Obviously equipment would be parcelled out at the beginning and not shared, and we could social distance. Although there'd be no loo, which is tough with toddlers...

but now The weather is turning I’m just having to keep her inside all day every day

now the weather is turning get wet/warm weather gear (decathlon is great for that).
plus a flask or travel mug for tea for you and hot chocolate for dc.
puddles on a rainy day followed by a warm bath is great!

Going to read properly later, but yes. I have a two year old. Here in NI we have a non funded pre-pre school year, I'm actually just messaging my friend, who works in our local preschool, about it now. DD could start in May. I hadn't considered sending her to nursery, but it's been 8 months now with very little contact with other children and it is really worrying me as there is no end in sight.

Nothing is open here. I mean nothing, for miles. It's awful. Library was open but now closed again.

People tell me it doesn't matter and she'll be fine, but I've seen children before who have spent their toddlerhood cooped up inside and taken nowher, and it isn't good.

I've worked with kids of all ages so have a vast array of messy play and craft stuff and have bought more, I've really tried. I'm consciously taking the time to teach skills etc.

But when my now teenager turned 3,she had a gang of little friends at her birthday. They all met at the same group aged 1 and they're all friends today. They ran around playing all sorts of games and interacting loads. All this "they don't need to socialise before age 3" is nonsense in my opinion, teenager is actually quite introverted and likes her own company now but at 2 and 3 she was always desperate for company.

It's shit. I don't believe for one minute there's not going to be significant issues with some of the kids coming into school in a few years

Haha I love all those get the right gear and out you go... I’m a true all weather outdoors persons and on days when it’s raining I don’t see out these MN outdoor people in the playgrounds... they are empty!!

Seems that it’s finally dawning on the Guardian that older children might be suffering a bit under lockdown. Just waiting for the handwringing headlines about babies and preschoolers to start now...

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2020/oct/20/sage-experts-warn-of-impact-of-covid-policies-on-young-generation-z-harm-pandemic-coronavirus?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

@Nancydowns, my comment was not to OP but to the poster who was saying she hoped to get free funding for a nursery place for her under 2yo.

I have no issue with posters asking for ideas about how to entertain a 2yo, but like most I do find it strange that winter means not going out for some.

@HavelockVetinari forest schools playgroups are running round here (tier 2) so people are looking for something and it must be possible. I guess it depends on your insurance and your risk assessment.

The other thing to consider is if there are any big airy but covered spaces near you that could be used but would provide at least some shelter. One of our local parks has a thing that looks like a barn roof but with no walls and a drumming groups meets there once a week.

Check out the five minute mum website for activity ideas as well. So helpful during first lockdown.