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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think Christmas Eve boxes are absolutely ridiculous and unnecessary?

999 replies

dressinggownwearer · 19/10/2020 07:14

Just that really. Do children not get enough at Christmas without giving them even more the day before?! What are Christmas Eve boxes even for/full of that can't wait until Christmas Day?! Am I being mean and a grinch or do people agree?

OP posts:
ktp100 · 19/10/2020 10:39

I always do one, primarily because I'm always busy on Xmas Eve, with lots of family staying and needing feeding etc AND Xmas dinner prep (you know how it is!) so a little box with new XMas PJs, a little Xmas teddy, a Xmas movie and a treat (usually hot chocolate and a few sweets) frees me up for a couple of hours.

Do I have time to watch Elf on Xmas Eve? Do I buggery but you best believe I'll punt everyone else in to watch it and breathe a sigh of relief while I have 90 glorious minutes of peace in which to peel a mountain of spuds!

DestinyIsAll · 19/10/2020 10:41

Never done Elf on the Shelf, I don’t get that at all, but we have done a Christmas Eve hamper since ds1 was small, he’s 25 now, so it’s an older established tradition in our house with all our 5 dc. It’s up to each family what they like to do, and what tradition they want to make, no one has to do it or feel they have to do it.

My parents died very young, I have no family now and DH only has his dm, so our dcs aren’t lavished with gifts from others. We’re not excessive generally with Christmas so they don’t have expectations of multiple gifts and huge amounts spent.

Even if they had more, the Christmas Eve box doesn’t have to be about getting additional gifts to add to the ridiculous excess of it all. For us and I think most families, it’s pretty low key, it’s definitely about fun and tradition for us and easily comes within the remit of a few special Christmas extras bits most people ordinarily buy, I don’t see it as particularly extravagant.

We don’t have a big lead up to Christmas, and for us and families who do it it’s just a lovely way to make the evening special and properly begin festivities. Everyone has continued to always be here on Christmas Eve and we have dd3 who’s 13, so we’ve carried on with it, it’s our tradition. None of us wants to stop, we all love it. After dinner when we all go to sit down, the ‘elves’ leave it at the door.

I don’t feel any pressure or encouragement to do it and I don’t feel it’s consumerist. I would essentially save buying new pyjamas they needed each year until then, so for those that say they if needed they would just buy them anyway, honestly what difference does it make? I would always buy warm and cosy ‘winter’ pyjamas but not specifically Christmas themed.

Some people who don’t get it might spend loads more on e.g. alcohol than I do or a new Christmas outfit or getting their hair and nails done, or new decorations, or cleaning their house from top to bottom ahead of Christmas, or buying teacher or work colleagues gifts.

I don’t buy the older ones pyjamas to put in now, I’ll put in e.g., cute bed socks instead, plus a new family game to play in the evening, (eg Game Off) a few Christmassy drinks, special flavours of hot chocolate and marshmallows, candy canes, gingerbread and other Christmassy type biscuits, e.g., lebkuchen, and chocs, e.g., the M&S chocolates that spell Merry Christmas.

It’s just bloody fun and nice and special for us. If you choose not to, fine for you, but why anyone would want to judge or criticise our tradition is beyond me.

Twinkletwinklelittletwat · 19/10/2020 10:42

I love doing our Christmas Eve box. But it's a family box and it's our evening of fun. Not extra presents. Its a note from the elf saying what movie she wants to watch before she leaves, something nice to drink, some snacks for the film and a new nightie each for the girls.
Our stockings don't have sweets in. They have an apple and an orange and some colouring pencils and mini colouring books.
They do get sweets/chocs but not first thing.

earthyfire · 19/10/2020 10:46

No I don't do it. I think I did it once but it is unnecessary so I didn't continue with it. Children are allowed to open one small gift on Christmas eve from under the tree which are presents from relatives - it's what I was allowed to do as a child so have continued this.

puddlemuddles · 19/10/2020 10:46

Christmas eve boxes are just another way to part fools with their money and make people who have no money feelike shit for "depriving" their children of another gimmick.

It doesn't cost me anything extra, though.

I did get the idea off Mumsnet, but the things that go into the box I always got anyway. e.g. I always got my DC PJs at Christmas, I always got booze for the grownups, Christmas books and DVDs and sweet treats for all.

I use a box I have at home. I even used the hot chocolate out of the cupboard last year! We had a nearly-full jar so no point in buying a new one. I must admit, I did use some new ribbon though. Hmm

The only thing that's changed is I put it all in a box on Christmas Eve and the elves play knock down ginger with it!

You don't need to do any of these things if you don't want to, and there are ways to do it that don't cost extra money, if you do want to do it.

QueenofLean · 19/10/2020 10:47

@GlummyMcGlummerson

Totally agree.

All the kids I know who get Christmas Eve boxes are complete brats sorry not sorry

I know a lot of kids (I have three young ones of my own, all my friends have young children) and I have no idea if they get Christmas Eve boxes or not!
kowari · 19/10/2020 10:48

If I did a box, I'd make it a first of December box.

Yesmate · 19/10/2020 10:49

Yea! The “I don’t agree with what you do at Christmas” threads have started 🙄

CherryValanc · 19/10/2020 10:50

This thread gives me hope. Do this mean we are going to have at least one "normal" in 2020? That the level of stressing about Christmas from some is going to reach the usual height of neurotic levels for some. So determined to obtain the perfect and "correct" Christmas day that it removes all joy.

TheKeatingFive · 19/10/2020 10:50

I know a lot of kids ... and I have no idea if they get Christmas Eve boxes or not!

Perhaps Glummy sends out a survey. Grin

Thurmanmurman · 19/10/2020 10:51

Don't do them then. My kids get new PJs on Christmas Eve but not a box. I don't care what others want to do though.

earthyfire · 19/10/2020 10:51

Due to social media people have a fear of missing out, when I was a child I had no idea what other families or school friends did on Christmas Eve. 😂

myhobbyisouting · 19/10/2020 10:51

"I think I did it once but it is unnecessary so I didn't continue with it"

Do you only continue doing things that are necessary @earthyfire? Surely doing something because it nice or fun is better than not doing them.

It's unnecessary to visit a beach, but it would be sad to never do so in your lifetime.

OverTheRubicon · 19/10/2020 10:53

Yanbu. It's often just more tat, at a time of year full of insane overconsumption.

I love a big Christmas, but brand new 'christmas pyjamas', and special mugs and all kinds of other bits and bobs every year, on top of presents later, is nuts.

myhobbyisouting · 19/10/2020 10:54

"Due to social media people have a fear of missing out, when I was a child I had no idea what other families or school friends did on Christmas Eve. 😂"

My children have no idea what school friends do on Christmas Eve....because they don't have social media Confused

Happygogoat · 19/10/2020 10:55

YABVU to care about other people's traditions/habits for Xmas for their kids.

My Dd has a Xmas eve box with pjs, a book, and a snack in. Yes it could wait til Xmas day but we do the night before.... it doesn't mean she gets more on Xmas day, it just means it's spread out and is fun.

For the record she also won't get loads on Xmas day, likely some puzzles, stories, and a couple of toys.

Some kids are spoilt at Xmas (it generally) but a) it's not your concern and b) unlikely to be correlated to Xmas eve boxes in particular.

NewarkShark · 19/10/2020 10:57

Putting Christmas PJs in to be worn once or twice before going to landfill is incredibly wasteful, but Christmas in general is incredibly wasteful so 🤷🏼‍♀️

myhobbyisouting · 19/10/2020 10:58

Agreed @NewarkShark but then, who does that?!

Ninkanink · 19/10/2020 10:59

I really doubt that anyone does that. And if they do then that is absolutely ridiculous.

I don’t about other people but my girls wore their warmer pyjamas right through winter and spring every year.

mam0918 · 19/10/2020 10:59

They are litrally things for the christmas eve night though, giving them on xmas day defeats the entire point of them.

And they arent 'gifts' they are PJs, a bedtime book, new toothbrush, hot chocolate etc... all badtime items so why would you have those things in the morning?

As for what goes in a stocking?
Stockings arent much of a thing here (never understand people who pack sacks with huge gifts and call it a stocking or people that just stuff them with underwear and toiletries which to me arent 'gifts' but 'nessecities') but stockings most contain sweets like chocolate coins, chocolate orange, rainbow drops etc... and a few silly little things like bubbles, a sheet of stickers, temporary tattoos etc... nothing that would go in a xmas eve box.

Also the idea that its a new 'fad' etc... is wrong, we have been doing is since the early 90s (possibly before but I'm too young to remember what we did in the 80s as I was a baby/toddler still) and it started as a book scheme thing to encourage children to read.

I still have no idea what an 'elf on a shelf' is though... anyone want to explain that origin and purpose because Im unkowledgable in it and dont really 'get' it.

Fink · 19/10/2020 10:59

We don't do one, but because we're practising Christians it's quite important for us to get the seasons the right way around - Advent is penitential through December and Christmas is celebratory. Christmas starts at midnight on 25th and goes through till 6th January (presents and feasts and fun activities every day). People who aren't celebrating it as a religious festival can make up their own rules and I can see why a Christmas Eve box might appeal to those with kids.

diggadoo · 19/10/2020 11:01

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the request of the OP.

earthyfire · 19/10/2020 11:01

@51myhobbyisouting - unnecessary for ME and MY family...is that ok with you? Sorry that my comment seemed to hit a nerve with you.

mam0918 · 19/10/2020 11:02

@NewarkShark

Putting Christmas PJs in to be worn once or twice before going to landfill is incredibly wasteful, but Christmas in general is incredibly wasteful so 🤷🏼‍♀️
we buy character PJ (Minecraft, Fortnite, Paw Patrol, Hey Dougee etc...) and they are worn for the next 6 months or so until they grow out of them and if they are in good condition (usually are) they get given as hand me downs.

I have NEVER thrown out usable clothes, litrally who would do that?

puddlemuddles · 19/10/2020 11:02

Putting Christmas PJs in to be worn once or twice before going to landfill is incredibly wasteful

Why are you assuming the PJs are Christmas ones?

a. the PJs we put in aren't Christmas themed, I suspect the same is true for a lot of people on this thread.

b. when a relative gave DD Christmas PJs one year, she wore them till the summer! They don't need to go in landfill.

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