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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To clamp his car?

44 replies

Delain · 18/10/2020 19:44

My Dad has been a drug addict since before I was born. He's 73 and last weekend my brother and I had to do an emergency visit as we thought he had severe dementia. I took him to the GP and it turns out there's nothing wrong with him. He's just taking such a potent mix of prescription, non prescription, over the counter and illegally sourced drugs from the internet. Mainly opioids, sleeping tablets and strong pain relief but no one knows what for sure as he's a pathological liar and a classic drug addict.

The GP said he is unfit to drive and that she will inform the DVLA. She instructed Dad to inform his insurance company.

He's a ticking time bomb and is going to kill someone. Last month he wrote off his new car off by driving down a ditch. The police officer in attendance asked his friend, who came to help, if Dad was high.

Dad's hidden his car key and he's refusing to tell me who his insurance company is so I can inform them he's been told he's unfit to drive. He says he's 'told everyone who needs to know' which means he hasn't informed them. He's very aggressive and is the type of man who refuses to wear a seatbelt as he dosn't like to be 'told what to do'...

I know he's been driving even though he swears blind he hasn't. His car has moved places and he's left the keys in the ignition with the car unlocked even though it was checked by us the night before, for example.

I've informed crimestoppers. Filled out a DVLA report as well as the GP. (I've also informed his GP he's still taking a cocktail of drugs, still driving and still refusing help from SS even though he's been referred to them 3 times now as well as multiple different addiction agencies. He won't entertain them.)

I've filled out an online police form and spoke to an agent via live chat who said unless they catch him driving dangerously there's nothing they can do.

It's literally a matter of time before he murders someone. Can I clamp his car? Is there a company to will do it. I don't have any friends.who could tow it but could o pay a company to do it? Dad can't report it surely..as he has no legality to drive it? Where would I stand legally? I can't just break-in and take his keys as he has at least two sets and has hidden a set somewhere in his awful house. It's probably on his person at all times.. and even though he's old and off his face, when it comes down to it, I'm still frightened of him.

Just to prevent any drop feeding - He was very abusive when I was a child so am low contact with him now. I live about half an hour away and my brother lives about 4 hours away and works what seems like 24/7 so it's eaiser for me to deal with things. I've also NC as this is very outing.

OP posts:
MsAdoraBelleDearheartVonLipwig · 18/10/2020 23:31

Do you know any of his neighbours? Could you approach any of them and ask them to report him when he goes out?

Sorry if my account of the news story upset anyone. I only read about it yesterday and it has really stuck in my mind. We can only hope that if the Op’s father does crash his car he doesn’t take any innocent people with him.

seayork2020 · 18/10/2020 23:45

I am not sure anyone can cancel his insurance unless it is him/a person on the account? well I presume a court can but I don't think it is as simple ring and up and it is done thing.

Could one of you see a solicitor/citizen's advise bureau or anyone to get actual legal advice?

makingmammaries · 19/10/2020 07:14

Can you unbolt the front driver’s side wheel and take it away? You’ll need a jack and a few bricks.

Penners99 · 19/10/2020 07:38

Long screwdriver through the front grill, punch a hole in the radiator. The engine will seize in a couple of miles. Car off the road for a long while.

Elai1978 · 19/10/2020 07:47

Clamping his car would be a criminal offence so probably not the best idea.

Blueuggboots · 19/10/2020 07:53

The DVLA have been made aware so his insurance will be invalid as someone else has said.
You can ring the police and ask that his car is marked - tell them what you've told us. They would pull him over and drug swipe him if they saw the car.

FOJN · 19/10/2020 07:55

I think you will find it difficult to defend yourself if you damage the car to immobilise it. I did know a legally qualified person who use to arrange for a family members car to be clamped when they went on a drinking binge and they never seemed to get into any trouble for doing so.

What could your dad do if you clamped the car? If he phoned the police it would quickly become apparent that the DVLA had been informed he was unfit to drive and was therefore not insured. You have tried all legitimate means to prevent him from endangering others and I doubt that lack of valid insurance will stop your dad driving so I think removing his facility to drive is the only way.

If you don't want to clamp the car because of the questionable legality then I think you have to walk away and know that you did what you could.

FOJN · 19/10/2020 07:58

I would also add that even if your dad lost his license he could still drive if he had a car so reporting him to the police and having him pulled over and tested may still not result in protection of other road users.

slipperywhensparticus · 19/10/2020 07:58

You have done a you can short of public shaming him

Clymene · 19/10/2020 08:03

So if he left the keys in the ignition, why didn't you just take him? And as @Flaunch said, if the police think you're under the influence of opioids or anything else after an accident, they test you, they don't just ask your mate.

MyNameHasBeenTaken · 19/10/2020 08:13

Not RTFT as getting kids to school
But what about a tracker?
Bot sure of all the details, but I have seen little devices that you put on luggage, kids, pets.... and an app on your phone shows where the tracker is.
When the tracker is moving, the car is moving.
That's when you call the police. With a live location.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 19/10/2020 08:14

I'm not sure what telling the insurance company will achieve. They cannot physically stop him from driving only withdraw his insurance.

I suppose there is a chance that without insurance a police ANPR system will flag him up if he was driving and his car would be seized.

CallmeIT · 19/10/2020 08:18

I can see why you would want to stop this but it isn’t your responsibility. And nor should you feel guilt if the worst were to happen. I doubt the police officers who suspected he was high when he drove into a ditch yet took no action will. You have told every authority you can and asked for help. If they can’t or won’t give it you shouldn’t take the law into your own hands and put yourself at risk here. You’ll know by now you can’t control him in any other way and you won’t be capable of controlling him on this. Go easy on yourself x

Reedwarbler · 19/10/2020 08:25

One thing I can't understand in your op, you say he wrote off his new car in a ditch and the police attended. If they thought he was off his face they would have done something about it. It is illegal to drive while incapable through drugs and they have testing kits for illegal drugs, or otherwise can have blood tests taken, so that bit of your story sounds most peculiar. Also, if he wrote off a new car, and now presumably has another car, the insurance company must be happy that it was a genuine (no fault on his part) accident otherwise they wouldn't have paid out.
Other than informing the police that he is a regular drugged driver, there is not a lot you can do that is legal.

userxx · 19/10/2020 08:28

You can buy a car clamp online, barriers direct do one for £60.

DC3Dakota · 19/10/2020 09:36

Just block it in! Park directly behind his car, perpendicular.

Elai1978 · 19/10/2020 11:07

You can buy a car clamp online, barriers direct do one for £60.

And it’s a criminal offence to use it

userxx · 19/10/2020 15:27

And it’s a criminal offence to use it

If she genuinely believes her Dad is going to kill someone whilst driving, then fuck the criminal offence!!

I’d happily take a bollocking rather then knowing my own flesh and blood had wiped out another life. Wouldn’t you ?

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