Spending time with young teen? Force, or not?

[N0tthe0nlyfruit]

YANBU = insist on some shared time
YABU= let teen do their own thing

DS is an 'old' 12. He loves golf with his friends, hanging out online playing all the usual popular games, and chatting to his BF after school for a while each day. All good. However he doesn't want to do anything with me anymore. I understand it's the great separation, and probably a positive sign that he's maturing and forming his own identity but I miss hanging out a bit!

Do you (should you?) insist on occasional walks/outings even if your teen complains bitterly, or do you just let them fly free?

I wouldn't force him to do the walk if he is doing the other family things, sounds like it's the walk he doesn't like. As long as he is getting some exercise with his golfing then I wouldn't worry.

Coming from a teenager myself, absoloutely not. Never force, unless it's something they MUST do. My parents forcing me into pointless things with them when i just wanted to do my own thing just made me resent them

If we are having a family day out or a meal together, yes, I insist he joins us, but that's not that often.

@jennie0412 are you still a teenager now? If so, don't resent your parents for them forcing family time just yet....it's a difficult thing being a parent

@myhobbyisouting i don't resent them now because I know it's hard to parent a teenager who doesn't want to spend time with you, but i explained I want to do my own thing sometimes, that I don't necessarily want to spend time with them when it's convenient for them.