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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

David Attenborough

121 replies

felineflutter · 15/10/2020 14:14

To be find his nature programmes too distressing to watch and children should be spared from watching them?

Ok so little flamingo with salt stuck to legs so couldn't keep up with his/her peers in search of water? DS still asking did he make it? Penguin being bopped around like a volleyball and his little face in the killer whales jaw. Luckily DS didn't watch this episode and probably won't watch the rest of the series.

I get this is life but surely they could skip the gruesome bits? We know animals eat other animals but I don't want to see the inside of an abattoir for entertainment either?

OP posts:

Hangingover · 17/10/2020 02:52

Unless you're vegan it seems a bit odd to be so uncomfortable with killing for food

Do you think vegans go around telling cats not to eat mice etc

I'm vegan and I love these shows.

LunaNorth · 17/10/2020 03:02

I’m afraid I’ve started to groan when I see David Attenborough’s face looming at me from the telly with his Awful Warnings.

I just can’t hack it, on top of everything else.

nighttrains · 17/10/2020 03:07

@CHIRIBAYA

Real life isn't a Disney film though is it? It's endless cycle of birth, death and renewal and I think that in itself is amazing and beautiful; we all have to accept our place in the big scheme of things, sooner or later. Our current thirst for immortality reflects our failure to embrace this truth. These programmes are only presenting the natural order of things; whereas if you flick to the other channels (especially Netflix) every other programme is a detective/murder series. We seem to have such difficulties considering death unless it is presented in this manner and I think as a consequence we have lost touch with an essential part of what it means to be human.

Well said.

I'd let my children watch DA over Disney any day, as it is they watch a good balance of the two and we discuss whatever they ask about.

squeekums · 17/10/2020 03:17

@felineflutter

My DS is 8 and it was too much.

well then dont let your kid watch, be the parent Why should the whole way its filmed be changed to suit some precious petals? Its reality, its what animals do in nature. They hunt and kill

Topseyt · 17/10/2020 03:38

@babygroups

My DS is 8 and it was too much.

I mean this kindly but if you make up lies about the 'other flamingos pecking it off' etc then he'll know you're lying. Children become distressed when they're not just told the truth in an age appropriate way

For example; my dad died in December, we knew he was dying and I told my son in advance. He had questions of course and I told him that grandad was very sick. When he died I told my son he was dead, we of course cried together. He's 4 and still misses his grandad and asks about him. I answer all of his questions honestly, he wasn't dwelling on it, he accepted that it was sad and he could talk about grandad whenever he liked.
Until my mother in law thought she was being helpful by telling him that he wasn't dead, he was only somewhere else and was still 'looking over him' etc.
This really confused and distressed my son, it was 2 months ago and he still asks very confused questions about it and is upset that he was told something that didn't make sense.

I totally agree with this. Children need honesty in a way that is as age appropriate as possible, but sometimes nature, and life in general can be brutal.

My DD2 was only 3 when their paternal grandfather died. He had been very ill for a couple of years. I told the children that he had died as gently as I could. I couldn't actually be certain that DD2 had really understood, but she did gradually settle down to this new normal (awful phrase, I know). The questions were getting much less frequent until one day MIL told her that grandad had gone to heaven. She meant well, but it didn't work and it triggered DD to start asking when he would be coming back?

Nature can be brutal and I don't think it can always be sanitised. Some children will cope with it and others will find it harder. There are some age appropriate nature programs which can be more suitable for younger kids.

HeronLanyon · 17/10/2020 03:50

I am still haunted by some of these one transatlantic flight was pretty much ruined by an otherwise amazing documentary about a new black bear family. Stupidly o forgot the distressing parts when recommended it to a friend for next flight. She hasn’t forgiven me for the trauma !

nighttrains · 17/10/2020 04:07

@HeronLanyon

You are both adults, a nature film shouldn't cause trauma

HeronLanyon · 17/10/2020 04:16

Well that told me, nighttrains.
I wasn’t using the word ‘trauma’ in its psychological meaning. I’ll bear your advice in mind.

Imworthit · 17/10/2020 04:18

This is life. Sir David is realistic, relevant and important 30 years since I first heard of him. His programmes teach children true nature, survival skills, decorum, climate issues, science, the birds and bees, logic, conservationism and curiosity.

Imworthit · 17/10/2020 04:21

If its traumatic its because we prefer to ignore it than see how we might be complicite.

Yes we can't save every animal, every environment but not watching doesn't make it untrue.

Rollmopsrule · 17/10/2020 04:29

He focuses on the tragic and gory because that's what nature is. Its tough with very few 'fluffy' bits inbetween. I went on a safari and saw a baby elephant calling for its mother- it had been abandoned by its herd because it was injured. The lions were closing in and nightfall was coming. It was bloody horrific.

Goosefoot · 17/10/2020 04:43

I have been an enthusiastic watcher of wildlife programs for 40 years or so and I do think they have changed. They have become less generally informative and more sensationalised. I am perfectly well aware of the more unpleasant side of life in the wild having been fascinated by animals all my life, but I do not want to see these things in lurid, close up detail, filmed in as distressing a fashion as they are. It is almost as if (and I think DA is most at fault here) they are deliberately looking for ever more gruesome footage to inject something 'new' to hold our attention.

You know, I disagreed with the OP, but I do think there is something to this. I homeschooled my kids in the past and was always on the look out for good documentaries. I found a lot of the recent ones contain a lot less information, and many seem to have lot of filler in terms of computer simulations and such. (Don't even get me started on historical documentaries which are now almost unwatchable.) I ended up looking for older ones, they were often much less gimmicky.

Bellagio40 · 17/10/2020 05:14

Totally agree, OP. I can’t watch them myself for the same reason.

RaisinGhost · 17/10/2020 05:43

Hmm I half agree OP. I agree that they are really sad. I've enjoyed his docos in the past but I can't watch the latest one. Not because I'm a climate change denier or want to be ignorant, the opposite. I'm already at maximum sadness and panic about it.

Where I disagree is saying that he should have done it differently. It's great the way he has done it, it's just not for me, and if it's not for you and your kids either, just don't watch it.

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 17/10/2020 05:48

sometimes his programmes though beautifully shot seem like glorified hunting films

But that is how animals survive . Hunting is their life. You are viewing animal behaviour as if they were human. YOU have decided to label the penguin ‘cute’.

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 17/10/2020 05:55

And animals eating other animals isn’t ‘brutal’ or ‘tragic’, it is just animals feeding themselves.

LunaNorth · 17/10/2020 07:34

@RainingBatsAndFrogs

And animals eating other animals isn’t ‘brutal’ or ‘tragic’, it is just animals feeding themselves.

Yes, but I’m the wild they feed themselves without swelling strings and an urgent voiceover in the background.

It’s not the thing we’re seeing that’s the problem, it’s the way it’s presented.

LunaNorth · 17/10/2020 07:35

miimblemomble · 17/10/2020 08:13

«So I would probably shield a child or most people from throttling a rabbit and skinning it before I put it in a soup but hey that's just me«

M’y children have watched their grandfather shoot pigeons, then helped pluck and clean them afterwards - and enjoyed them roasted! They’ve also been fishing, and helped gut and clean the fish for cooking.

What DA shows is nature as it is. We make up stories and emotions to go with it. Tbh I love the photography but not so keen on the heart stirring violins and emotive language.

Tumbleweed101 · 17/10/2020 09:04

I used to love his documentaries as a child and mine also watched them from a young age. It fostered a real interest in the natural world for me that I still have today.

As for the flamingo - I think the particular one that got filmed did get rescued by the people filming it even though they aren’t meant to intervene. Sure there was something about that after the series was shown (years ago now that I saw it so not 100% sure).

Ace56 · 17/10/2020 09:56

Funnily enough, DA’s programmes aren’t aimed primarily at children. They’re for adults.

If your DS is too distressed to watch them, then don’t let him. Maybe he’ll be ready in a couple of years.

But does DA need to change his popular, award-winning, respected programmes to suit your precious DC? No.

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