If I went & shot the woman across the road

[KathH]

Sorry this is long. Dh went to fetch ds1 from school & for about 10 mins dd2 aged 10 who goes to high school and dd1 who's 14 were in the house on their own. A woman across the road came hammering on our front door and dd2 answered it. She came to complain that while her front door was open our cat had widdled in her crash helmet. She grabbed dd2 and stuck her head in the crash helmet to smell it. DD1 was giving her a mouthful while this was going on. She told dd2 that she was going to get a gun & shoot our cat or drown him in the canal. DD2 started screaming at this point so one of our neighbours came round & took her into her house while she calmed down. I'm fuming - I appreciate it's not nice for her but surely if she's got a problem with my cat she should speak in a civilised manner to me or dh. DH has reported her to housing association but I'm very tempted to go across the road & deck her for terrorising dd2 (I know this isnt very helpful)

Good to go to the police, she shouldn't have scared your child in such way no matter what.

I notice that your DD1 gave her a mouthful, which unfortunately may have made the situation far worse, so I would also tell your DDs that it is better to avoid the woman in the future rather than to confront her, obviously she can not be trusted to behave like the average adult.

As for the cat... well, cat better keep some distance for a while for his own safety. How to do that, I have no idea.

Interesting post from lucyellensmum. (I sympathise, btw, LEM, must be enormously difficult).

But... if you go and apologise, there's a risk she might think her behaviour was somehow justified.

Good for your ds1 anyway, standing up to the silly trout. She sounds like a bully.

She's a loon, you don't speak to children like that.

Well I think yes she IS a loon
I think she needs help, she isn't well

yes, edam, there is every possibility that she will think that, so it is a very difficult position and i guess time will tell. The trouble is with people like this, loneliness can be a terrible thing, it allows them to fester in their own bath of self pity and they manage to turn their way of thinking that it ok to shoot someones cat, when they ordinarily wouldnt dream of doing such a thing.

You speak sense, LEM.

The thing that puzzles me is that she has two cats of her own, so why is she so convinced it was the OP's cat who peed in her helmet?

Most cats avoid houses where there are resident cats, so, unless she actually saw the cat peeing, she is being completely irrational.

Her behaviour was totally OTT and unacceptable whether she knew for certain it was the OP's cat or not.

What did the police say to your dh?

you did the right thing.
If I read it correctly, she has no proof that your cat peed in her cycle helmet, she just suspects.

And manhandling your children is way out of order. she picked on the smallest child, not the bigger one, iirc?

yes, she may have very genuine problems, but she can't be allowed to terrorise everyone else like that.

Freckle, it couldnt have been her cats, they are her husband remember, I'm sure he didnt pee in helmets when he was alive so of course she knows it wasnt hers!

He probably did when he was pissed ......

my god! that's absurd. i'd be very angry too.