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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Who is BU?

2 replies

Liquoriceallsorts87 · 10/10/2020 16:41

I’ve name changed for this as it’s so outing. This is a current ongoing situation and it’s going to be a big one here so I’d like some perspective.

I’m so fed up today, it’s been a really shit week. I’ve been on my own trying to hold down an almost 1 year old who is being a little s**t at the moment and sort out a house sale / purchase. Not my DP’s fault. He’s had a work commitment and it’s just fallen at a bad time.

Today was another day whereby the baby won’t nap, he didn’t sleep more than 20 mins last night and he’s beside himself with being grumpy / tired but won’t sleep. This has been going on in cycles for the last few weeks. Don’t know what’s up with him, anyway. To add to the stress having instructed and completed all the paperwork for the solicitors last week I find out today that they’re not on the approved list for our mortgage lender and we have to change. Another stress.

I’m fed up, tired and to make matters worse we’re skint and now this will undoubtedly end up costing us more money. I unsuccessfully tried to have a nap this afternoon whilst DP spent time with DS. Eventually I thought f**k this and went out to get myself a coffee. I thought I’d just drink a coffee in peace for once and scroll a few MN threads and return home to do dinner for us all.

DP decided as I wasn’t back in 20 mins that he’d take DS out the house and go off in the car. I called him to find out where they were and he’s refused to tell me ‘because I left’. He asked ‘who I was with’ i said I was in the drive thru que for costa ....

I know it sounds batshit but he’s done this to punish me. I’ve recently been diagnosed with PTSD and have huge anxiety / stress being separated from DS.

He’s punishing me for going out on my own isn’t he?

He does trust me, he just didn’t want to be left to do the childcare on his own so he’s made it into a horrible experience for me.

Have I gone crazy?

I’m furious. I’m honestly contemplating my relationship over this. He’s just not supportive.

YABU - you’re being crazy let it go
YANBU - have this out with him

OP posts:
okokok000 · 10/10/2020 16:44

You're not being unreasonable at all. Is he always paranoid and controlling?

Liquoriceallsorts87 · 10/10/2020 16:48

He’s now messaging me questioning that I’m not home (because I’m in the car and haven’t gone into the house).

No our relationship is just beyond damaged because I’ve been in a terrible terrible place for the last year without any support and it’s worn thin. I don’t think he can handle who I am now since this all happened.

OP posts:
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