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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s wrong to use someone’s address to get healthcare in a different area

130 replies

Coldnights · 09/10/2020 13:52

A friend of mine is using another friends address to get healthcare under a different mental health team than the one they should be in.

OP posts:
CupidStunt2020 · 09/10/2020 16:13

I do have empathy for her but she’s using a service where she doesn’t live

And? Does her address make her less deserving of help?

JacobReesMogadishu · 09/10/2020 16:15

She kept her address records at her Mum's so she could get their dd into a better primary school. Such a shame there's a postcode lottery for these things.

Now that I disagree with because she's depriving a more local kid of their nearest/local school.

Original poster
Coldnights · 09/10/2020 16:15

I think sometimes you do have to accept things for what they are. I don’t like my local gp I have to be registered there as it’s the on,y catchment on

OP posts:
Gooseygoosey12345 · 09/10/2020 16:16

The problem is with the system, not with the person trying to access better health care. I absolutely could not judge this person poorly for doing what they must to access the care they need.

m0therofdragons · 09/10/2020 16:16

I think it’s wrong there’s a postcode lottery!

movingonup20 · 09/10/2020 16:18

What is wrong is that service is dependent on where you live, completely wrong. They should set national standard and criteria, if you meet them you get treated end of.

Butterer · 09/10/2020 16:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OwlBeThere · 09/10/2020 16:21

I think the fact she feels the need to do this to get help is wrong. Desperate people do desperate things. If I thought it would help my daughter faster/more I would do it in a heartbeat.

TheFreaksShallInheritTheEarth · 09/10/2020 16:28

@Coldnights

I think sometimes you do have to accept things for what they are. I don’t like my local gp I have to be registered there as it’s the on,y catchment on
Not liking your GP hardly compares to needing urgent care and not getting it, when the care us available nearby.

You can't accept things for what they are when your loved one is in crisis and denied help.

Original poster
Coldnights · 09/10/2020 16:35

My gp haven’t been helpful when I’ve been crisis quite frankly they are awful doctors but again I have to put up with it due to a postcode.

OP posts:
Dozer · 09/10/2020 16:37

The under resourced, poorly performing system / ‘postcode lottery’ is the problem.

Original poster
Coldnights · 09/10/2020 16:38

She is on benefits as unable to work

OP posts:
Butterer · 09/10/2020 16:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Saz12 · 09/10/2020 16:43

I couldn’t get worried about this: when ill, most people find their health to be the most important thing in their lives and will bend rules to get what they need. It’s not ethical, but the real “bad guy” is the inadequate, under-funded healthcare system.

Letsgetgoing123 · 09/10/2020 16:46

@JacobReesMogadishu

She kept her address records at her Mum's so she could get their dd into a better primary school. Such a shame there's a postcode lottery for these things.

Now that I disagree with because she's depriving a more local kid of their nearest/local school.

Yes I agree this is very annoying.
Milkshake7489 · 09/10/2020 16:47

No. As other pp have said it is the fact that she can't get the correct level of care without lying that is the problem.

Healthcare should not be dependent on a postcode lottery.

If you're really her friend, be pleased she's getting the help she needs. If not, just ignore and move on.

ThreePipeProblems · 09/10/2020 16:49

@Coldnights you could register as an out of area patient with another GP surgery.

QuestionableMouse · 09/10/2020 16:50

Far better she does this than walks in front of a train. Which is what one of my friends did because there was no help in his area.

WhatWouldJKRDo · 09/10/2020 16:54

@Coldnights

I think sometimes you do have to accept things for what they are. I don’t like my local gp I have to be registered there as it’s the on,y catchment on
It’s a NATIONAL Health Service. The level of care should be uniform but it isn’t. So desperate people have to move or lie to access the care they are due.

The scandal isn’t that she lied, it’s that she had to.

DPotter · 09/10/2020 16:54

At least she's living in the UK. There are many expats, especially living in Spain, who keep an address registered in UK so they can have access to NHS care.

unmarkedbythat · 09/10/2020 16:55

It's wrong that things are in such a state that they're driven to that. Any moral culpability here lies with those with responsibility for funding and resourcing the system, not the desperate people who have to resort to lies to get the care they need.

Butterer · 09/10/2020 16:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Coldnights · 09/10/2020 17:02

Was just interested to hear peoples views.

OP posts:
FrizzyHairMalarkey · 09/10/2020 17:02

@Coldnights

I do have empathy for her but she’s using a service where she doesn’t live.
Clearly you have no empathy, nor is she your friend. If you genuinely cared for her, you would understand why she is doing it and wish her all the best. I am sorry you are having problems accessing the service you require but with that comment, it sounds like you are jealous that she has managed to to find a way to access better care and you can't. Are you telling me that if someone offered their address in another area that would mean you could get the help you needed that you would refuse?
PostedTooSoon · 09/10/2020 17:03

@Coldnights

I think sometimes you do have to accept things for what they are. I don’t like my local gp I have to be registered there as it’s the on,y catchment on
Well no... You shouldn't have to accept a national health service prioritising certain areas of said nation depending on a few letters and numbers at the end of their address.

That isn't how a national health service is supposed to run imo. And we shouldn't have to just accept it, we bloody pay for it!