I have tasted the worst drink in Christendom. Can you top this?

[Iamthewombat]

Category, as Ru Paul would say, is alcoholic drinks aimed at women.

I bought a bottle of Malibu Strawberry Spritz at Morrison’s last week. I like Malibu (don’t judge me) and strawberries and fizzy things.

I opened it last night. Christ, it was awful. Tasted like a weird blend of kids’ medicine and saturated sugar syrup. Not sure how you can make something like this taste un-fruity. And it was virulent pink.

Down the sink it went, even the plughole seemed to be resisting it by vomiting up the pink foam.

I can’t imagine anything worse but maybe you know differently.

YABU = yes, there are worse alcoholic drinks aimed at the ladies and I’m going to give you details.

YANBU = no, nothing sounds worse than Malibu Strawberry Spritz.

Oh I liked snakebite and black. Some places wouldn’t serve it as it made people a bit fighty. Not me, I just danced a lot then puked purple.

I remember drinking my mums Taboo, with a weird Schweppes mixer that was a bit pink and fizzy, it was lush. I can’t remember what it was called.

I once drank poitín mixed with Kombucha. Well, I didn't actually drink it - one taste and it was launched down the sink. It wasn't a drink aimed at women, I'll give you that - it was the last bit of booze we had in the house after a rather merry Christmas. Never to be repeated. Never.

My DH loves an Italian aperitif called Cynar made from artichokes and i think Chinotto is similar to this. I think it's supposed to be bitter but each to their own etc etc,
I bought some peach diet coke a while back, a six pack, of which five are still in the garage. I have never tasted anything quite so nastily synthetic before.
And I came across this the other day, a huge bottle containing five separate sections of mostly disgusting liqueurs. They included Parfait Amour , a tooth-rottingly sweet concoction made from violets!

I know not alcoholic but I bought a bottle of non-alcoholic aromatic red wine from Sainsburys at the weekend (am on the wagon boooo) and it was vile. Gave me HORRIFIC heartburn.

Egg coffee in Vietnam - tasted like a coffee flavoured omelette.

@Ocies

Once upon a time DH won a hamper at his work Christmas party. There was a bottle of virulent red liquid. The bottle was unlabelled, made of clear glass and it was a sort of Christmas tree shape. We weren't sure if the liquid was to drink or put in the bath. For safety we tested it to see if it lathered first - it didn't. We tried drinking a bit - tasted bitter and artificial. Still not sure to this day what it's purpose was!!

that reminded me of a decorative shaped bottle of bath oil I was given one christmas. Except it wasn't - turned out to be chilli infused olive oil for cooking. Painful. Gave the bath (and my skin) a weird orange tinge that was hard to shift.

I used to work in a pub and this old lady used to come in every Friday and drink double Pernod and diet Irn Brus from 5pm until closing 🤮

Root beer is rank. I do think though that I may like Beverley and Chinotto from the descriptions on here.
Years ago I worked in a pub and someone ordered a Malibu and milk. I think I repeated milk back to her five or six times as I thought I had misheard. I didn't try it but I can only assume it was awful. And this was at lunchtime so not at 1am when her tastebuds had vanished.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Lightning_(cider)

This stuff. Had it once at a party at college as a teenager and spent the rest of the night vomiting. Horrible stuff.

Dr. Pepper is so evil it should be internationally illegal. Also, Pernod, Ouzo and any other pastis.

As to how the OP's Malibu horror could be made palatable, try this -
Pour yourself a veeery large Bacardi ( or rum of your choice.)
Add ice, a slice of lime then no more than one or two drops of the strawberry concoction.
If you can still taste the strawberry, add more rum.

I've changed my mind about the worst drink. I got some Strawberry Diet Coke earlier this year, and it was foul.

weird Schweppes mixer that was a bit pink and fizzy
Schweppes Russchian maybe?

Sparkling Country Manor and Sherry.

I should also mention Label 5 Scotch Whisky. There was a reason a litre bottle was such good value, apparently. Worst whisky I have ever tasted. I wouldn't even use it to light a barbecue.

@ElizabethMainwaring oh god mad dog 20/20. < not envy The stuff of teenage nights out. Along with a "wine " called thunderbird. At least I think it was wine

I'm wondering now if any of the canned cocktails are any good, or are they all inherently nasty?

I've only tried the Marks whiskey and ginger, that was fairly awful.

Hardbackwriter came on to say Unicum, received it as a gift - used as a punishment drink - finally finished the bottle from hell in 3 years later Oct 2019. What did the sons girlfriend buy him last Christmas - yes a nice bottle of Unicum she thought we liked it as we got it out for each family special occasion (drinking session), the punishment continues ...

Someone told me once that Prosecco tastes like piss - now that’s all I can think of when drinking it

@VeggieSausageRoll

Riga Black Balsam

National drink of Latvia. It's a thick, black liquid (like a thick syrup) that is almost 50% abv and some fruit apparently (blackcurrant and cherry I think) but tastes herbaly. It's the kind of thing that your grandmother would produce to cure all ails. It's vile but everywhere in Riga 🤷‍♀️

Ooh I like the sound of that. I love weird flavours

When I was a PG student, my friends and I would sometimes have lunch in a pub near our department. There was always a group of older women in there who, to our amazement, drank red wine and irn bru in the same glass. 😱 Every time they would have this abomination, as if it were a perfectly normal thing to drink.

I didn’t like makgeolli very much when I had some in korea. It’s a fermented rice based alcohol and looks milky. It’s just not very nice. Not truly vile though.

@QuestionableMouse

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Lightning_(cider)

This stuff. Had it once at a party at college as a teenager and spent the rest of the night vomiting. Horrible stuff.

Ugh. You've just reminded me of that stuff - smells like some kind of fuel and tastes of sick. Do they still make it? It's meant to be cider but I don't think a fermented apple has been anywhere near it.

Oh and with regard to cider, I can't drink it at all now, not since someone told me they put a sheep's head in the vat to speed up fermentation.

Pogari Sweatwater. And tinned milk soda. Both from a Japanese vending machine.

Fizzy armpits. And fizzy yoghurt.

We have tried a Chinese drink - I am not sure what it's called - it is very alcoholic - apparently the working men drink it in China. It is horrific - smells of rotting meat and tastes as bad. it made me gag before I had tasted it... 🤢🤮Awful.

Another....have you tried the alcohol free sipsmith gin thats costs as much as real gin? Literally the 2nd worst drink ever - I mixed it with fevertree which is my fave tonic - such a waste...

Haven't RTFT, but if nobody's mentioned wheatgrass yet then I win and you can all go away.