It’s your fault I’m fat...

OverTheRainbow88 · 2020-10-07T19:30:13+00:00

Anyone else seen this programme? AIBU to agree that in most cases it is the parents/care givers fault?

CitizenFame · 07/10/2020 20:32

Well YANBU but... that is literally the title of the program and what it’s about, isn’t it? (I’ve only seen it once)

yellowmaoampinball · 07/10/2020 20:35

Well yes and no. The parents are overweight themselves so it's hardly suprising that they struggle to instil healthy eating habits in their kids.

I think the diet plans they put them on are shit though. Way too few calories, no real addressing of their issues as a family. I bet none of them manage any real long term change.

Original poster

OverTheRainbow88 · 07/10/2020 20:37

Yes, I agree, setting up to fail long term, by calling it a 6 week diet.

It’s quite shocking really

OP posts:

SD1978 · 07/10/2020 20:42

I've quite enjoyed watching this. I think it shows both sides- that parents need to take responsibility, but that the kids also have some accountability for how they live. My issue with the personal trainer is that they are great- but it's too short term, and most likely not affordable for many families to all have gym membership, and personal trainers, to encourage them. If that was provided for a year, I'd say there would be a much better chance of success.

THJ8LL · 07/10/2020 20:43

I think it is quite difficult when you are in a situation where a lot of things are out of your control.
For example during my teenage years I had to live with my grandparents for a while and although I loved my grandparents cooking everything was totally unhealthy and they would also order takeaways for myself and DS white often.
I would often ask my grandmother to buy healthier options but this didn't last long as I was the only person wanting to eat healthy. I was at the time studying sports at college so was active but the change in food completely threw me

Ended up gaining two stone and also have stretch marks that I'm left with for life!! Cheers gran.

Original poster

OverTheRainbow88 · 07/10/2020 20:45

There’s been a couple of episodes where they have to go into lockdown and struggle to buy the healthy food options as well!

OP posts:

Minimumstandard · 07/10/2020 20:58

Yes. It is largely the parents' fault if their children are fat. Children have very little control over their own diet and the things that make them healthy. By the time they have more freedom, their tastes are formed. Having said that, schools should do more. Very few children get the half hour of decent exercise a day which they're meant to get, it seems.

Sexykitten2005 · 07/10/2020 21:47

I’ve been loving this. Binge watched the lot. I’ve been enjoying the fact the kids blame the parents at the start but most of them seem to realise they are also partly responsible either by buying their own excessive amount of snacks or by not listening and disrespecting their parents.

I think it’s also shown a huge gap between different lifestyles and incomes and how much easier it is for people who are wealthier. I always thought fruit and veg is cheap why can’t people chose that but actually having seen one episode with a single mum working 5 jobs and her lazy son refusing to cook so she got home and threw convenience food in the oven I understand that aspect a lot better.

It’s been eye opening and I’ve been really rooting for the ones who clearly have worked at it whilst shouting at the tv at the ones who’ve given up after a week.

StepAwayFromGoogle · 07/10/2020 22:06

How old are the kids, OP? My 5 year old at her height and weight check at school was 'obese'. We're struggling to understand what we're doing wrong. She's active, eats healthily, few treats. Has a bit of a belly but the rest of her is solid like her Dad (he's 6ft 4in and built like a rugby player). Neither of us are overweight. We've been referred for local support now and my guess is that she's eating well but too much. It's very difficult to get a handle on portion size because she's the height of a 9 year old. So no I don't think it's our 'fault'. We're trying but we're clearly getting it wrong. And we've asked for help.

JaceLancs · 07/10/2020 22:39

What channel is it on?
Anyone got a link please

Oneborneverydecade · 07/10/2020 22:41

@stepawayfromgoogle has whomever referred her actually seen her? My DS was classed as obese. He's now about to turn 14yo, almost 6ft 5 (like his DDad) and slim. Take the advice but don't let it worry you, if she's very tall it stands to reason she'll also be heavier than your standard 5yo

Elsewyre · 08/10/2020 04:00

@THJ8LL

I think it is quite difficult when you are in a situation where a lot of things are out of your control. For example during my teenage years I had to live with my grandparents for a while and although I loved my grandparents cooking everything was totally unhealthy and they would also order takeaways for myself and DS white often. I would often ask my grandmother to buy healthier options but this didn't last long as I was the only person wanting to eat healthy. I was at the time studying sports at college so was active but the change in food completely threw me

Ended up gaining two stone and also have stretch marks that I'm left with for life!! Cheers gran.

But you could have just ate less?

Original poster

OverTheRainbow88 · 08/10/2020 06:06

@StepAwayFromGoogle

There’s different episodes with different ages,
But the ones I’ve watched are usually older teens, but often their younger siblings also look overweight.

Yes portion size is really hard to get right, in this programme they give them special plates showing how much to have and of what sorts of food.
So half the plate should be veg, 1/4 carbs and 1/4 protein. Maybe now your child is back at school, they may get back into a routine, during lockdown when bored it was easy to have more snacks than usual. And at school they may run around more during PE or playtime.
Oh also in this programme, one main occurring issue was the amount of snacks they have and the type of snacks they have- lots of biscuits/crisps etc. portion size and lack of exercise was the other major issue.
Best of luck to you guys, and it’s fab you’ve asked for help, hopefully they will come up with some easy and fun ideas.

OP posts:

Original poster

OverTheRainbow88 · 08/10/2020 06:08

@StepAwayFromGoogle

www.amazon.co.uk/New-Nutrition-Colourful-Child-Friendly-Dishwasher-Safe/dp/B0861BTGFV/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=kids+portion+plate&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1602133671&sr=8-3

Something like this?

There were lots of options on good old
Amazon

OP posts:

Holiday21plea · 08/10/2020 06:14

@StepAwayFromGoogle

How old are the kids, OP? My 5 year old at her height and weight check at school was 'obese'. We're struggling to understand what we're doing wrong. She's active, eats healthily, few treats. Has a bit of a belly but the rest of her is solid like her Dad (he's 6ft 4in and built like a rugby player). Neither of us are overweight. We've been referred for local support now and my guess is that she's eating well but too much. It's very difficult to get a handle on portion size because she's the height of a 9 year old. So no I don't think it's our 'fault'. We're trying but we're clearly getting it wrong. And we've asked for help.

It may depend what you view as “big”. Because from your description “rugby player” they usually are quite stocky. If your childs BMI was obese they probably are slightly over weight at least. I’m more familiar with BMI for adults but you have to be slimish to have a BMI within range.

Holiday21plea · 08/10/2020 06:16

Hi OP.
I have not watched the programme. I would definitely agree that a lot of the time parents who are over weight and have poor diets this bad habit is passed onto the child. I doubt the parents would do it deliberately though. It is likely though if your parents are overweight your children maybe too.

KatherineJaneway · 08/10/2020 06:40

It's also the parents not instilling good family habits like regular exercise.

Sexykitten2005 · 08/10/2020 09:31

@Holiday21plea one of the last ones I watched had a lad whose mum was gym addicted. 2 hours a day 5 days a week. But he definitely had some kind of issue around food as he would steal so much she started putting a lock on the fridge til he broke it then she used to take the food out with her in a bag to prevent him demolishing an entire loaf in one sitting.

@StepAwayFromGoogle All the children have been mid to late teens and all have been dropped from 3500/4000cals a day down to 1500. It’s definitely been lack of exercise/overeating issues not the stupid BMI percentile for young children that I think is totally wrong.

It’s been a good mix, some parents who clearly have never been taught how to eat healthily and want to learn, some who just work so hard they don’t have time To cook with lazy children not helping out, some With a lack of discipline and some who (like me) are actually just massive foodies and have enough disposable income to overcook huge portions of amazing tasting food and go back for second and thirds.

For trash TV it was really well done and quite insightful

tulippa · 08/10/2020 10:05

Speaking as a fat kid who is now a slim adult yes I think it's mainly the parents' fault if a child is fat - especially at primary age. Young children don't do the food shopping. They also won't always know how to manage their food intake. This needs to be taught. I just kept eating food that tasted nice - healthy and unhealthy - and no-one ever told me to stop.

I worked it out for myself eventually as a teenager but went too far the other way and have never had a 'normal' relationship with food.

Allowing your child to become overweight and doing nothing about it lands them with an unnecessary and difficult to solve problem they'll need to sort for themselves when they get older.

Mooey89 · 08/10/2020 10:10

What channel is this on please?

notacooldad · 08/10/2020 10:17

What channel is this on please?
I've just googled for you. It appears it is on channel 5