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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be concerned about employee?

50 replies

Fallenfromgrace · 04/10/2020 22:54

Had to make her redundant from a job she has been in for 14 years.
Diagnosed with a second autoimmune condition during lockdown.
Colleague she worked with in her department died suddenly last week.

Now panicking about how she can find work and attend appointments for her health conditions.She looks incredibly tired and thin everytime she comes in for consultation meetings and become very quiet and withdrawn. Aibu to be concerned?

OP posts:
SecretBlue · 04/10/2020 22:55

How awful :(
No advice I'm afraid.
Hopefully someone will come along soon with some wise words.

Lockheart · 04/10/2020 22:57

Since you're still in consultation, is there any way her job could be salvaged?

TheBeatGoesOn · 04/10/2020 23:01

Unfortunately not as it is not possible with covid around.
We have exhausted all other options but unfortunately her health also prevents her from doing those alternative roles.
It's difficult to see someone struggling so much, it really is.

AvoidingRealHumans · 04/10/2020 23:03

As awful as this sounds, could she not keep her job in place of the colleague who passed or was she up for redundancy too?
She is probably sick with worry about her health and not having a job soon, no wonder she's in a state.

CokeEnStock · 04/10/2020 23:05

You seem to have NC in 10 minutes.

QuacksInTheDark · 04/10/2020 23:26

NC fail OP

Sparklesocks · 04/10/2020 23:29

Are there any EAP services you can set her up with?

NoSquirrels · 04/10/2020 23:31

Does your company have robust post-redundancy support? That would be a tangible thing you could help with.

Very tough. Flowers

Elsewyre · 05/10/2020 01:02

@TheBeatGoesOn

Unfortunately not as it is not possible with covid around. We have exhausted all other options but unfortunately her health also prevents her from doing those alternative roles. It's difficult to see someone struggling so much, it really is.
So shes not redundant you're firing her because of her health?

Is that even legal?

Casschops · 05/10/2020 01:10

No OP stated that her role is no longer available due to COVID her health isn't up to other available roles.

FortunesFave · 05/10/2020 01:37

Are you able to visit her weekly? Is she a friend? I'd be making sure she had enough food.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 05/10/2020 06:15

Id be asking round trying to help get her a new job elsewhere.

ShinyMe · 05/10/2020 07:06

From an employee's point of view, I wouldn't want your sympathy or think much of it, however genuine it is I'm afraid. If I've worked hard for you for 14 years and done my best and thought you appreciated my skills and commitment, and knowing you knew about my serious health conditions and about the sudden death of my close colleague very recently, and yet you're still pressing ahead with redundancy and won't consider me for another role because of my health, which you've known about for some time and which is no fault of mine... yeah, I'd be upset and worried and not inclined to give a shit about how sympathetic you are. It's a horrible situation and I'd be depressed and scared and miserable.

If you genuinely can't offer her another role then make sure her redundancy package is as good as possible, make sure she has access to some good independent support, and let her leave as quickly as possible without having to work too much notice. And please don't suggest visiting her at home or trying to be pally.

toomuchfaster · 05/10/2020 07:15

I agree with @ShinyMe, fuck off with your faux concern or do something real in the offer you make. And no, don't try to be her 'friend'.

LigPatin · 05/10/2020 07:23

@ShinyMe

From an employee's point of view, I wouldn't want your sympathy or think much of it, however genuine it is I'm afraid. If I've worked hard for you for 14 years and done my best and thought you appreciated my skills and commitment, and knowing you knew about my serious health conditions and about the sudden death of my close colleague very recently, and yet you're still pressing ahead with redundancy and won't consider me for another role because of my health, which you've known about for some time and which is no fault of mine... yeah, I'd be upset and worried and not inclined to give a shit about how sympathetic you are. It's a horrible situation and I'd be depressed and scared and miserable.

If you genuinely can't offer her another role then make sure her redundancy package is as good as possible, make sure she has access to some good independent support, and let her leave as quickly as possible without having to work too much notice. And please don't suggest visiting her at home or trying to be pally.

An Employer is doing no favours placing someone in a role that they won't be able to do, even without the pressures of juggling appointments that the OP mentions.

Employers, not unlike Landlords, seem to be the epitany of evil on Mumsnet.

JalapenoDave · 05/10/2020 07:37

@LigPatin "Employers, not unlike Landlords, seem to be the epitany of evil on Mumsnet".

Don't forget teachers - they are hated on here too from what I've seen. Doctors as well.

m0therofdragons · 05/10/2020 07:43

After 14 years is she getting a generous Redundancy pay or the minimum? When I was made redundant it was rubbish but I got 9 month’s pay without tax so if she’s getting that it may be good timing?

ShinyMe · 05/10/2020 07:44

@LigPatin very true. But if you're making someone redundant then lots of additional sympathy won't make the blindest bit of difference to the employee. They're in the same situation however nice the caring boss is about it, and in some ways it could make it harder because the employee could be thinking that something might change.

OP, is there no way you can combine the roles or make a new role that this person can do?

Make sure your HR has a watertight case to prevent a constructive dismissal case too, you can't discriminate on grounds of health.

Twinkie777 · 05/10/2020 07:56

You cannot discriminate against someone because of health issues, but you are only required to make reasonable adjustments. If their health is so poor that they cannot fulfil the role they can, legally, be sacked.
From a human perspective this feels harsh but it does happen more frequently than you might think.

Livelovebehappy · 05/10/2020 07:59

Yabu for appearing to be surprised that she might not be coping. Obviously with the things that have happened she is not going to be in the best frame of mind. I’m guessing there’s not a lot you can do personally to make things better as your actions have contributed to the situation. Not saying you’re wrong in making her redundant as you have your reasons.

Pumpkinnose · 05/10/2020 08:04

I think the OP is getting a hard time here. Unless she owns the company she’s almost certainly a line manager who has been instructed to male the change. A lot of people have already been made redundant and I presume they’ve exhausted all options.

In terms of tangible assistance, see if you can offer her higher redundancy die to circumstances, offer to put her in touch with anyone in your personal network who might be able to find her a job. If you have an sort of employee assistance programme (common for large employers) put her in touch with them.

Meuniere · 05/10/2020 08:07

YANBU to be concerned
YABU to be surprised.

It sounds like you are feeling guilty about it (up to you to see if you actually have good reasons for it...).
But it sounds like you’ve kicked her in the teeth at the worse time possible and that you know it. (Regardless of whether this was something you could avoid or not)

nosswith · 05/10/2020 08:07

Look again at whether or not her job can be retained, even if only for a period of time.

Tumbleweed101 · 05/10/2020 08:11

You’re not BU to be concerned but it’s not surprising she’s not coping.

She’s unwell, grieving for her colleague if they were close, lost her job, likely worrying about money now plus all the other fall out we all have from Covid-19 this year. That’s a lot for anyone to be dealing with.

The only thing you can do at this point is make sure she has a fair redundancy package to help her through it.

OllyBJolly · 05/10/2020 08:15

What an awful situation, OP. I've had to manage this a few times in my career.

Redundancy, even for healthy, very employable people, is horrible. The circumstances you describe with the long service and the health issues, make it so much worse. Very few companies are able to keep people on the payroll who are not able to work. To do so often compromises the job security of others in the workforce.

I do agree with other posters. You'll be taking the blame for this from both the employee in question and her colleagues. There is unlikely anything you can do to make it easier. Perhaps ask a colleague to check in on her?

Flowers OP, many people don't realise the toll of having to make and implement these kinds of decisions.