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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be uoset that the arrangement of funeral flowers has been taken away from me

2 replies

LowFat · 11/10/2007 11:21

Okay I know I am being unreasonable, because at a time like this such a petty arguement is disgraceful.

However I need to vent because going on at DH is not fair or right, as it's his Grandad.

Bascially DH SIL (his brothers wife)is always moaning to me that she is the no one in DH's family arranges anything for themselves, despite the fact they all live close except me and DH who are a couple of hours away. And to be fair she has just arranged gift (we paid half) and resturant for a milestone celebration.

So with GD funeral I offered to arrange flowers (from us and them), 1, because I loved DH GD like my own and it was something I really wanted me and DH to do for him, and 2, because SIL arrange the last 'event' so I looked up flower arrangements, costs etc. And DH phoned his brother last night and told him what we found and did he want to go halves etc and said to call back today.

DH just called me at work to say SIL is now arranging flowers with local florist and this is what we are getting (similar arrangements to what I had suggested) and this is how much it costs (which is less expensive than those I found - part of her reason for taking over I think).

But I am so angry and upset that this has been taken away from us, particularly given her usual comments of "why does no one else do anything" I know we are paying half, but I now feel our contribution to the day is nothing. I have just cried my eyes out in the toilets and feel like I need something to break.

Anyway have calmed slightly while writing this, and am now thinking to perhaps get 4 roses from DH, me and DC's just so it is something we have done for ourselves - as well as go halves on the arrangements.

I know my argument is unreasonable and I wont be acting on it or saying anything else to DH (unless he brings it up), but from a personal point of view - Am I being unreasonable to be so upset?

OP posts:
FioFio · 11/10/2007 11:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

dissle · 11/10/2007 11:25

a little bit sensitive i would say rather than unreasonable, "unreasonable" i think is too harsh in this circumstance.
I think that you have your own reasons for feeling this way, that are important to you, but you are bieng very sensitive.
It obviously matters a great deal to you....but let it go now, it really is not that important is it?
just let it go and think of grandad and his day.

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