Is this normal? **Trigger Warning Suicide**

[ColumbiaAGroupie]

I'm aware that this probably isn't an AIBU post but I genuinely don't know where else to post this.

I found out a couple of days ago that someone I knew during my teenage years has commited suicide. We only met a couple of times and he would call me up every so often during this time, but honestly I didn't know him well at all. I hadn't spoken to him in a very, very long time (about 15 years) but I cannot stop thinking about it. The events of what happened keep going round and round in my head. Is this a normal way to feel about someone that I barely knew.

Please be kind

When my Dad killed himself, one of his colleagues was feeling similar to you and really was shocked about it. They didn't even get on so were not friends.
It was more born out of curiosity because he couldn't comprehend doing something like that himself. It was also because my dad 'didn't seem the type' and all their interactions never hinted at the troubled person he was

A sudden or shocking death of someone will play on your mind, especially if they are young, or the same age/stage as you.

Someone I vaguely know, a friend of a friend I had met a few times had a baby the same age as mine who died very suddenly overnight. I've thought of her often, and the sheer horror and pain of that experience, as I've watched my own baby grow up.

Something about the baby being the exact same age makes it feel close to home, same with old school friends etc.

When I heard of a workmate from years ago death I was really upset. Wasn't particularly close to them, but I think that as it was in sad circumstances and they were the same age it made me question my own mortality. My ex couldn't understand why I was so upset, but it hit hard.

Feel how you want to feel, OP, there is no right or wrong way to feel about something like this. Something similar happened to me, in that someone I knew from the age of 12 committed suicide. I didn't find out until a year after the fact. I had not heard from them in ages (they would dip in and out of my life a lot which was fine with us both!) and I was trying to track them down to see if they were okay. I found out by messaging an old mutual friend we had and they told me what happened. I still get gut wrenched by it when I think about and all of the details surrounding what happened and I found out 2 years ago. So just let yourself feel what you need to and don't feel weird about it. The death of a stranger can be equally as upsetting as someone we know, so the fact you know them to some degree will add further weight to that. I hope you're alright, OP.